Jul 202014
 

JimmyjaneForm4The Jimmyjane Form 4  seems to be suffering a case of mistaken identity. Everything it claims to be, it is not. 

I don’t have a good history with the brand; in fact it’s well-known that I will never recommend one of their products. I fondled their Iconic line at a Babeland a few years ago and was extremely underwhelmed. Don’t even get me started on those bumblebee-in-a-can Little Something vibes. I hated the Hello Touch and I wanted to set fire to the Form 3. The Form 6 bored me so much that I never found the fucks to give to review it. I tend to think that everything made by JJ is in the buzzy camp and very overpriced.  Yet I start to doubt my convictions now and then when I read a positive review. I start to think that possibly not all of the Forms are awful and I should give it a shot again. So when Peepshow Toys sent me the Form 4, I tried very hard to pretend it wasn’t a Jimmyjane vibrator. I tried to ignore the ludicrous ad copy. 

All of my efforts failed. I still don’t like the Form 4. Let me count the ways….

Barry White?

I’d like to hand Jimmyjane the Lelo Smart Wand Large and the Minna Limon and the We-Vibe Tango and drill it into their heads that those items are rumbly. Those items could possibly be called the Barry Whites of vibrators. For Form 4 to self-claim the title is presumptuous and just dead wrong.  I tried the water test (which the Form 3 failed spectacularly). In the short video below, I tested (in order of appearance) the Leaf Fresh+, the Lelo Mia 2, the Je Joue Mimi Soft, the We-Vibe Touch and then Tango, finishing and starting the clip with the JimmyJane Form 4. All of the vibrators I tested had more of an impact on the water than that of the Form 4. 

I personally respond best to deep, penetrating vibrations. Lacking that, I require pressure (so that the vibrations travel through flesh a little farther). It took me 35 minutes of play and porn and a lot of pressure to coax out an orgasm with the Form 4. The orgasm was a bit like a failed July 4th firework – You see the trail going up up up into the sky, you hold your breath and wait for the bang and burst but it never happens. It’s just a silent “poof” of nothing with a tiny light sputtering and spiraling to the ground. Plenty of people do not need strong, deep vibrations. I think you already know this about yourself, if this is the case. But if you’ve hated more vibrators than you’ve loved, if manual clitoral stimulation is a frustrating endeavor then let me lead you away from the Jimmyjane Form 4.  There is no “exceptional power”. It is moderate, in everything it does.

Flexible! G-Spot!

Form4FlexOn their site, Jimmyjane has a graphic that is apparently supposed to represent how flexible the Form 4 is. Um, no. “Form 4″ and “Flexible” are in different zipcodes. States, even. With a lot of force pushing the head in one direction and the neck in another, I can get the Form 4 to be very slightly flexible…ish. This claim has to be the most far-fetched of them all on the Form 4.

Listen, my g-spot needs either pressure or fullness or firm strokes. The Jimmyjane Form 4 cannot deliver any of these. And if your g-spot is not located right near your pubic bone, the Form 4 isn’t going to reach. You’ve got maybe 3 inches of insertable space if I’m being generous. This coupled with the straight bowling-pin shape1 does just not make for a g-spot vibrator.  STOP TRYING SO HARD, JIMMYJANE.

More seam than a pair of legs circa 1942

Silicone-covered vibrators have a seam. It’s the nature of the beast. You can’t avoid it. But you CAN make the seam less noticeable. Jimmyjane did not. I don’t consider myself extremely sensitive but even I felt that seam during external use. Most people are more sensitive than I, and would likely be quite bothered by this. For ~ $145, I expect way better.

SO 2010

In my list of gripes, it feels very minor to gripe about the charging cable and the packaging but it irks me enough that I can justify it. It’s 2014, Jimmyjane. Time to slim down the packaging, use less plastic, make the charging unit more travel-friendly. It’s been a few years since I received a rechargeable toy with this giant A/C adapter plug. Many companies have switched to USB for worldwide compatibility and others at least made the adapter smaller.

JJForm4Packaging JJForm4Charger

It’s not all bad….?

You get a moderately powerful slightly buzzy waterproof vibrator that is stuck in between the lands of Clitoral Vibrator and G-Spot Vibrator. It’s longer than most vibes meant for clitoral action, which in my world is a good thing. It’s easy to hold. There is still some vibration sensation that travels throughout the entire vibe, so it’s not like ditching the smaller clitoral vibes for this gets you noticeably less tingly of the fingers. It comes in gray…..

….That’s all I got. I can’t find anything else good about it. I tried.

 Where should you go from here?

Vibrators that are more powerful and rumbly than the Jimmyjane Form 4: Lelo Mona 2; Je Joue Uma; Minna Limon; We-Vibe Tango; We-Vibe Touch; Jopen Envy 3; Je Joue Mimi Soft; Leaf Fresh+. Lelo Mia 2 is a bit more rumbly but about the same intensity and the same can be said for even the Lelo Gigi 2.  If you don’t really need something powerful, I think even the Gigi 2 (and it doesn’t rank super high for me) would be a better choice than the Form 4. More of a handle, better g-spot curve and head, and can be used externally. I’d suggest Je Joue Uma if you want a little more length and intensity/depth of vibration in a style that can be used for g-spot or clitoris. If it’s just clitoral you’re interested in, I’d recommend the We-Vibe Touch for a more pleasing vibration that still retains serious power within an ergonomic, silicone-covered body, or the We-Vibe Tango for the ultimate in deep, rumbling vibrations. Both the Touch and Tango have 4 intensity speeds so you don’t need to choose the super-powered setting if you don’t need it.

Bottom line is that I can recommend a whole host of vibrators that perform better and cost less than the Form 4. I can’t find any reason to ever recommend the Form 4 over anything else.

 

My appreciation to Peepshow Toys for allowing me to satisfy my curiosity, and prove to myself that I just shouldn’t trust Jimmyjane to deliver. After all, this is a company that thinks people are going to pay $40 more for the same vibrator that has 24K gold plated charging contacts – or, better yet, $3,500 for a platinum & diamond 1-speed piece of crap. They seem to have done away with their $4k bouncy house and $35k plane ride, at least. Between their ridiculous pricing, inability to make even one awesome vibrator, and the fact that they’re now owned by Pipedream (a company I wouldn’t trust as far as I could throw them, so it’s a match made in heaven) – this is a brand I simply won’t recommend. 

 

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  1. I think it also is shaped like squash, also not sexy or conducive to g-spot play
Jul 162014
 
Vixen! Medium Realistic Bent vs Vixskin Tex

The Medium Realistic Bent and Vixskin Tex are the same size, length and design – modeled after an average-sized cock with foreskin. The only difference between the two is that one is dual-density Vixskin and comes only in flesh tones, while the other is more firm and comes in colors like black and a gorgeous purple. I’m not a fan of super-realistic dildos, but the realistic design squick can be offset for me with non-realistic color options, hence why I chose the Medium Realistic Bent as my single-density Vixen to try out. Probably the only real issue I have with these two dildos is the length. It would be a great addition to a harness for thinner build people, but from my experience larger people need a dildo that is a little longer. I carry a lot of weight in my midsection and it can interfere with a harness dildo of this length. For solo

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Jul 112014
 

This got to be a little more complicated than just 5 simple things, but more knowledge is good…right?? Right. I’ve also asked some veterans to weigh in. Epiphora made this great post for sex toy reviewers but I wanted to see if we could narrow it down and make it less about being a newbie and more about “continuing education”. So Tip #4 comes to you from Piph! I want to be clear and say that a lot of these things don’t apply to your average blogger who is just blogging to have an outlet, a writing voice, etc. That type of blogging is no less valid; you’re in it for you and nobody else and that’s awesome. But if you want to be a reviewer and be given things to review from companies, then you need to treat it like a job in some ways.  1. Know about sex toy material safety and proper

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 Posted by at 1:30 pm
Jul 102014
 
Contest Winners!

I had anywhere from 80-140 people vying for EACH prize in the big 6 year giveaway which is awesome but sad at the same time. Why sad? Because I wish I could pick more than one winner per item. Also: Welcome newbies! Next contest, if you stick around, you won’t be a new visitor anymore and will get bonus Loyalty Points for the next giveaway. How? This past contest, one way I was able to do that was with my Google Plus page. There was a special post on there only visible to those following my page, which is something I’ll do again so if you’re not already following me on there, you should be.  I’ve also decided to do a monthly newsletter like all the cool kids,  and there will be a code published in the newsletter prior to an upcoming giveaway that’ll get you a bunch of bonus entry points.  But you have

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 Posted by at 12:31 pm
Jul 062014
 
Hot Octopuss : Pulse Vibrator for Men

Skeptic: Converted. I’ll admit, I was skeptical of the Pulse when it first came out – and a small part of that is the company’s name: Hot Octopuss. It doesn’t do it for me. And then somewhere along the line, it got dubbed the “Guybrator” and my eyes rolled out of my head. But I read a few positive reviews, started to rethink things and asked Lovehoney if we could review the Pulse. My cis male husband has enjoyed vibrating objects placed on and around his cock in the past, so I thought that he would at least find it decent for foreplay. What we didn’t expect, however, was for it to work so well. I mean, look at it!  But, don’t knock it til you try it. So far, it’s been used under conditions where one would think that an orgasm would be nearly impossible for him: in a lot of pain from dental

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 Posted by at 12:01 pm
Jun 262014
 
Doxy Massager Review

There are so many “wand vibrators” on the market now. Companies saw that some people liked or needed the power that came from the plug-in electrical beasts (or as they refer to it in the UK, “mains powered”) despite the fact that they weren’t made to be used as a sex toy. When the Magic Wand formerly known as Hitachi stopped being sold in the UK, one company’s answer was the Doxy Massager Wand.  According to their site, Doxy boasts as being the “most powerful”.  This is sort of like naming a bank, in my opinion. I highly doubt that the First Bank of {insert name here} was *actually* the first bank for that town, but it sounds nice, eh? The Doxy is the world’s most powerful mains operated wand massager. Launched in 2013, it’s attracting an increasing number of enthusiasts, keen to experiment with this heavy duty, but controllable, intimate massager.  Wanting to offer

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