~ Policies ~

 

Huge props to Girly Juice for creating an amazing policies page that I couldn’t improve upon, so I’m borrowing. These are my policies for everything from content to emails. Please read them carefully before contacting me so that we don’t end up wasting each other’s time.

Blog content & sponsorship policies:

  • Sex toy reviews
  • Products I don’t review
  • Sponsored Posts, Guest Posts, Free Content
  • Link Exchanges
  • Advertising
  • Social media posts
  • Quoting/using my posts/photos

Contacting me, Commenting, Email & other business policies:

  • My comment moderation policy
  • Sending me press releases
  • Advice & Sex toy recommendations
  • Asking me for professional advice
  • Interviewing me
  • Giveaway Policies
  • Asking me to join your affiliate program
  • Legal Matters
  • Anonymity
  • Morality Clause
  • Contacting me

 

 

Sex Toy Reviews

Manufacturers: I will review items sent directly from manufacturers if the product is available at the places I affiliate with (I prefer to link to Shevibe.com), and if I can also link people to my affiliate retailers. I know that some manufacturers have affiliate programs but I find that people usually don’t buy from manufacturers (one exception has been Tantus). There are very occasionally exceptions to this rule, though. I will not review for a manufacturer who doesn’t have an affiliate program and I will not review for a manufacturer who primarily sells their product via Amazon.com – I won’t link to sex toys on Amazon.

Retailers: Because the review process is time consuming and is very much like a job to me, “free product in exchange for a review” without being an affiliate is not enough for me to review for you at this time. I can’t pay bills with sex toys. I may (at this point it’s a very weak “may”) be open to doing paid reviews, but a paid review does not mean a positive review. Since I only will review for a retailer with an affiliate program, please see that section. I won’t work with retailers who stock mainly porous products, and few silicone options. I also will not work with retailers who are not abiding by MAP.

I don’t work with many companies, as you’ll see. Right now I’m not signing up with any other American sex toy retailers. I will consider partnering with Australian, British or Canadian companies that meet my requirements.

Important to note: I won’t work with retailers whose site design heavily depends on dividing sex toys up into “male” and “female”, and, worse yet, insinuating that there are “gay” or “lesbian” toys. Fix that shit and then come back to me.

My terms: I don’t do one-off reviews just because you have an affiliate program – if your shop has a broad enough selection while still being curated enough to contain many body-safe (non-porous) options, then I would expect to be in an ongoing, regular reviewing relationship. This doesn’t mean many products a month, but it can’t just be the one time, either. Unless the product is wildly popular and I loved it (and your pricing is competitive) I won’t make any affiliate earnings for one review – I need links peppered throughout my site. I’ve been doing this for over 9 years; I’ve come to understand the tides. I’ve been asked what a review relationship will get you – it gets you reviews. I invite you to really browse my blog to read my reviews and see how I handle them, as well as my many social media accounts and you’ll see that reviews get promoted heavily across all of my social media platforms.  An affiliate banner in the upper sidebar only happens with large, established companies who make it a condition of reviewing or once I’ve had time enough to know that the relationship is going well and I definitely want my readers shopping there.

Once you send me the item it is mine and I will not pay for it or send it back if you’re unhappy with my review post or how long I take to review it. Any review stipulations, time frame requirements, etc should be spelled out clearly prior to hammering out a relationship agreement, and be provided freely without me having to pry for these details. Surprise requirements after I’ve already received the item are null and void. Once a product has been sent to me for review, I will be posting a review that is honest. This does not mean a positive review. I reserve the right to publish my entire opinion, however I see fit. I do not work with companies that ask to review/proof with the intent of controlling my language or opinion in my post before it goes live, nor will I abide by requests to refrain from publishing a negative review. My language will be my own. I will refrain from linking directly to a competitor’s site in the review of your product, but I will link to my own posts, about any product and from within the review post, as I see fit. I may also see fit to link to a fellow blogger’s review of your product or a similar product and will do so at my discretion.

I shouldn’t have to say this, but if you cannot discuss all terms or cannot tell me everything about the product (due to your release not being rolled out yet, it being in prototype, etc) then we have nothing to discuss. Come back to me when we can have an open, honest conversation.

Your act of sending me product to review equals your agreement to my terms and conditions above

 

 

Products I Don’t Review

At this time I am not reviewing products other than sex toys. I don’t review supplements, condoms, websites, books, porn/porn sites, BDSM equipment and (usually) don’t review lubes (unless I’m reviewing a bunch all at once).

Sex toys I do not review, or write about include: large penetrative masturbation aids that look like chunks of body parts; sex dolls; sex toys that are made from materials other than silicone, metal, wood, glass, ceramic, stone, ABS plastic. I will occasionally review a masturbation *sleeve* that is porous, but prefer to stick with  name brands that are known for being non-toxic. I also do not review butt plugs / anal beads, but will sometimes review prostate-specific items. I don’t review penis enlargers, extenders, sleeves to be worn during sex, strap-on dildos meant for penises. I don’t review pumps of any kind – penis, nipple, clitoral, vulva, etc. And finally, I’m not interested in reviewing really large items like fucking machines.

 

 

Sponsored Posts, Guest Posts, Free Content

Sponsored posts can happen if I feel that your company is a safe place to send my readers (plenty of quality sex toys, good prices) and if the post is something I might normally consider writing. I won’t accept sponsored posts where you write the content, and I don’t want it to read like an advertisement. You can email me to discuss options and then rates. Before inquiring about a sponsored post, take a look around my site. Look at the type of items I normally review, my stance on issues, etc. It should be fairly obvious with a few-minute perusal if your site/product/etc is something I could write about it. For example, I’ve never (and will never) review supplements or dolls; I don’t discuss ED; I don’t write about or review anything related to BDSM. A sponsored post linking to an escort/sex worker site simply wouldn’t fit my demographic or my content. These are just a few examples. Taking a few minutes will save us both hassle and time.

A guest post would only happen if a reader from an under-served area (trans, as an example) wanted to let me post a review for a product available from one of my affiliates. If you’re a reader and feel that there’s something I should share with everyone, contact me. Guest posts will not have links that I don’t add myself. A guest post will never be allowed from another website. I won’t link to your site.

I won’t write posts for free about your infographic, your crowd-funding campaign, your cool new product and I definitely won’t share press releases. You, the person contacting me, has most likely been paid for your work that you’re trying to get me to put up for free. As a blogger my time *is* valuable and I expect that to be respected. I cannot pay bills in “exposure”.  If you want to discuss paying me to do so, or paying for other means of advertising on my site then it might be open for discussion.  If the item in question is interesting to me I might share it once on social media but writing a blog post about it is work.

Important to note: I won’t work with retailers whose site design heavily depends on dividing sex toys up into “male” and “female”, and, worse yet, insinuating that there are “gay” or “lesbian” toys. Fix that shit and then come back to me. 

 

 

Link Exchanges

I didn’t think I really had to add this because it’s 2016. Links just don’t matter to Google as much as they used to. I do not do link exchanges. Ever. I link to sites I read and love, and that’s the long and short of it. I just don’t have the space to crowd my sidebar with links that are there out of obligation. If you choose to link to my site because you enjoy it and think your readers will too, I humbly thank you. I am flattered and honored. But please do not do so in hope/expectation that I will return the gesture. If it’s traffic you want, consider approaching blogs who take advertising!

 

 

Advertising

I offer limited slots for banner ads *only* at this time. Banner sizes allowed are 150×150 or 150×250. Please contact me for current rates; at this time I am only accepting advertisers who prepay for at least 3 months of advertising. Discounts are available for those prepaying 6 or 12 months in advance. Your site and the ad must be relevant to my content.

Terms:  Invoices will be sent from Paypal, and payments need to be made in US funds. Payment of your invoice indicates your acceptance of the following terms and policies:

  • All sales are final – no claims or guarantees are made regarding the performance of advertising.
  • There are no refunds once your ad has been placed on my site, there is no early termination.
  • Banner ads are to be free of nudity, promotions/sales/discount codes, and must be static images – I reserve the right to request a different design if the design initially received violates my terms.

Important to note: I won’t work with retailers whose site design heavily depends on dividing sex toys up into “male” and “female”, and, worse yet, insinuating that there are “gay” or “lesbian” toys. Fix that shit and then come back to me. 

 

 

Social Media Posts

I won’t be able to make social media posts (Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook) for free about your business, funding campaign or infographic unless I personally know you. Payment for these can be discussed by contacting me. I will write the content and payment must be made up front. It must be 100% relevant to my brand and my current content.

 

 

Quoting/Using My Work

You may absolutely link to anything I’ve written without contacting me. If you’d like to include a quote from a post, please keep the quote to 3-4 sentences. I ask that you not alter or change anything I wrote when you quote me. I also require that you link to that post and credit me the person as Lilly, or credit the site as dangerouslilly.com.

Blogs do not work like Tumblr, and you may not “repost” something that appears on my blog. This constitutes copyright infringement and I will contact your hosting company to get it removed.  If you believe that anything on the Internet  is free to take and use as you wish, then please do not use any of my work in any way.

If you would like to use any of my photos, you must contact me first and tell me where you will use them and why. If the photo you want to use doesn’t already have my copyright watermark then I will send you a version that does. If I give permission to use a photo, you can’t crop it or alter it. Attribution will be required with a link to the page or post the photo appears on, credited to Lilly of dangerouslilly.com.

 

 

Commenting on my posts – My Comment Moderation Policy

I discard any comments that are offensive to others, obvious attempts at trolling, or comments that devolve into off-topic arguments. I’ll also sometimes remove comments that really don’t belong on a page, like asking for a sex toy recommendation on the Care & Cleaning page. I’m happy to give advice, but there’s a time and place. This site is a personal blog; not a magazine publication or a company Facebook profile – it’s my house. If I feel like your comment is just made to be inflammatory and isn’t helpful to the conversation, I will remove it or not publish it. I have no problem with people who disagree with my opinions, and don’t censor everybody who disagrees with me. But I reserve the right to do what I want with comments, and that’s that.

 

 

Sending Me Press Releases

Unless I’ve already opted-in, please don’t send them. I will not publish them on my site. Ever. There’s no precedent for it, they don’t fit with my content, and it’ll never happen. If you’re sending it about a product, then I’m going to assume this means you want me to review said product.

 

 

Personal Advice and Sex Toy Recommendations

I answer nearly every question that a reader has. Check out the posts on the Toxic Toy Page and look to see what I’ve already reviewed, first. Do a search. If you have a question about material care, your answer is usually found here. If you write to me and ask what I think of XYZ sex toy and if it’s safe, ask yourself this: Is it made from a non-porous material? If not, then I’m not going to recommend it (unless it’s a masturbator – and then I’m going to tell you that you should replace it after 6 months) – bottom line is that if it’s a “soft” material and isn’t silicone? I’m not going to recommend it. If you cannot afford silicone, then get TPE or TPR from a brand I don’t hate and replace it after 6 months. I’ll answer questions via email, the chat/contact box you see hovering at the bottom of the page, or if you need to remain truly anon then you can submit an ask on Tumblr.

 

 

Business Advice, Product Advice, etc

So you’re thinking of opening a sex toy store, or you have opened one already but would like to do better. You’ve read my blog and are impressed with my expertise (why, thank you, yes I do work hard at that). Great! I do consulting, and will discuss rates with you. I can understand it’s hard to justify that if you’re just starting out but my time has value. You wouldn’t possibly expect an accountant to look over your bookkeeping for free, right? You wouldn’t expect a therapist to see you for free, right? My time has value, my expertise has value – clearly, which is why you’re seeking it. Just because I run a website doesn’t mean I can help people for free. It’s not fair, it’s not acceptable. 

 

 

Interviewing Me

I will answer interview questions via email, I don’t do phone interviews or Skype. Please let me know where the interview will be published, and please link to my site. I am Lilly, of dangerouslilly.com, I don’t really like to be called “Dangerous Lilly” like I’m an evil floral villain of some sort. If the article you are interviewing me for requires that I submit a photo of myself and/or give you my legal name, then I won’t do it. I’m an anonymous blogger.

 

 

Giveaways Run on My Site

Due to some very vague accusations of unnamed bloggers sending out “used” giveaway items that were touted as brand new, I’ve decided to make a pledge and have it be an official policy.  If I ever have an item/items sent to me from a manufacturer or retailer for a giveaway because I’m going to be handling the shipping, I will request that, whenever possible, they shrink-wrap the item or apply anti-tamper stickers to the packaging. In uncertain times I can understand how people who do not know me could become wary of any & all bloggers running giveaways. I want my readers to feel assured that, in addition to my word that any products I offer for giveaway are unused, I’m going to every effort to give you proof. I also am very picky about who I work with for giveaways, and I only work with companies I trust.

 

 

Joining Affiliate Programs

At this time I’m pretty picky about the affiliate programs I join. Your shop should carry primarily body-safe, non-porous sex toys, but it should also have a broad range of items. I find that people are less inclined to shop heavily curated sites because they want to see other options, and perhaps buy more than one item at a time. I also will only work with retailers who play fair and abide by MAP; if your prices on certain luxury brands dip well below what you’re supposed to be selling it for, then I can’t work with you. You should be prepared to regularly send me items for review, I’ve found that a once-in-a-blue-moon review for a company doesn’t lead to commissions for me. Commission percentages should be a minimum of 15% without payouts no more than $100. For International affiliate programs I actually prefer paper checks because Paypal’s exchange rate is always a few points low.

Since reviewing and affiliate go hand-in-hand, please make sure that my review policies align with your own. I won’t join your affiliate program unless I’m actively reviewing for you.

Please note: If you’re a manufacturer, then I’d need to review your products, and they would be products unavailable through retailers. Tantus is the exception to the rule and I won’t join affiliate programs for manufacturers usually.

I do not join affiliate programs if you are a porn site, behind a pay wall, selling a book or anything like that.

 

 

Legal Matters

In this day and age of shady sex toy companies, patent trolls and so on it is probably inevitable that I may review an item that is a copyright violation / patent infringement. However as a reviewer I am bound by agreement with the party who provided the item to me (this can be the infringing company or a third-party retailer). If your item has been infringed I suggest you take the matter up with the courts and the offending company. Not me, not other bloggers. Harassing and bullying bloggers and reviewers is simply a surefire way to lose respect, not gain business. Whether you are right or wrong my hands are tied until your attorney contacts me with evidence that a court ruling has stated that all reviews must be removed. Then and only then will I happily comply; otherwise I could be in legal hot water with the retailer/company who provided me the item in exchange for my honest and unbiased review (which is seen as in lieu of payment). 

I’m a blogger. I’m a consumer, too, and I’m a consumer advocate. I voice a lot of opinions here and share a lot of facts that some companies would rather I not – it makes them look bad. I’m well informed on the legalities of libel and am aware that I’m not making libelous statements. If you’re a company taking issue with my opinions about you, a civil email wherein you offer to hire me for consulting time to tell you how you can do better and change my public opinion of you will be read, responses not guaranteed.

This is all I have to say on the matter and unofficial threats, bullying or harassing emails will be deleted. Unless your missive comes through proper channels via official paperwork and an attorney, it is simply harassment.

 

 

Anonymity

I am an anonymous blogger for personal/professional reasons. If I had the privilege to be working under my legal name, then I would, but keeping my anonymity is a matter of great importance. If I have to provide you with my legal name and mailing address, you are agreeing to keep this information private and not share it with anyone without my consent – this applies to affiliate programs, advertisers, and those who send me items for review. I also insist that packages sent to me NOT contain my blog address or the name Dangerous Lilly. I will be providing the link to this Policies page to everyone, and by agreeing to work with me means you are agreeing to my Policies and terms, including agreeing to uphold my anonymity.

 

 

Morality Clause

I reserve the right to remove or edit reviews or banner ads associated with companies whose marketing campaigns, business practices and/or treatment of people in their employ are later found to be sexist, racist, transphobic, homophobic, fat-shaming, condone non-consent, or are otherwise oppressive  (with no compensation to them). If I find that your company isn’t trustworthy with communications and privacy, I will also cut all ties.

 

 

Contacting Me

Please note: while my standard email address is a Gmail address, if I am contacting a company first then I will use my domain email. There is currently an Australian person claiming to be me to get free sex toys.

This isn’t a site run by multiple people, there is no “webmaster”. There is only me, Lilly, and if you begin your email with “who should I talk to” then it’s pretty clear you didn’t take even a few minutes to read my policies or look around my site.

My name is Lilly; that’s 3 L’s. It’s not hard to get it right – you had to type it that way to get to my blog, you had to type it that way to send me an email, so please don’t call me “Lily”. My preferred pronouns are she/her. As a hard and fast rule I restrict my contact to emails. I do not do video calls or phone calls. I am hard of hearing and will not be able to understand what you’re saying, plus it’s just not ideal for me.

And finally: I reserve the right to publish via website, Twitter and/or Facebook part or all of emails sent to me. If you are a reader or fellow blogger, your identity will not be revealed unless said email verges upon an abusive, ridiculous, nonsensical or illogical nature (i.e. if you’re behaving like a complete jerk) but as always, the discretion is mine. If a missive contains multitudinous spelling and grammatical errors, crude references to sexual behavior, uninvited images of genitalia, threats to consult a Legal Counsel on retainer or to sue for Defamation of Character, please expect to see that correspondence mocked and derided electronically and (possibly) physically set aflame in my own personal backyard.

 Posted by at 12:17 pm
  • Avery (formerly an Amanda)

    Lilly, as a fellow Vr6 aficionado, my darling Jopen of 7 years finally split at the charging port yesterday, letting in a little water during a wash, and now the arm no longer vibrates. ::loud wailing:: It is a sad day to lose my favorite toy out of a large collection, and the first one to teach me how to squirt. That being said, I know you are a fan of dissections and have a scientific mind. Would you want my old faithful for any research purposes? I am willing to donate so its spirit lives on.

  • josiemae

    How can I contact you? The email you have posted is not good.

  • I assure you, the email address listed is good. Perhaps you’re not typing it correctly.

  • josiemae

    Weird cause I copied and pasted what you have on there and tried several different times and it keep telling me it wasn’t a good addy.
    I’ll have to try to figure it out then.
    Thanks

  • John

    Hey, I was wondering, is the prism 5 a toy good to use on a girl while giving her cunnilingus at the same time? If yes, I’m guessing it would be used for penetration? And is it one of the best toys to use while giving cunnilingus?

  • taylor_serenil

    I was attempting to sign up for this month’s giveaway (put down SheVibe as gift card choice) and I couldn’t remember the *name* I used initially. So I can’t tell if I successfully signed up or not. (I am a current subscriber at taylor_serenil@hotmail.com.) I would deeply appreciate it if you could check on that for me before the end of the month, and I am very sorry that my memory issues are adding to your workload. I’m fine with resubmitting if it turns out that I need to, I just want my shot at $50 of SheVibe goodness.