Sep 172015

Patchy Paul G5I finally have a Fun Factory vibrator that I can recommend. I’ve been underwhelmed, overstuffed, had pubic hairs ripped out, put to sleep, and bored. I tried out the G4 version of the Patchy Paul and Big Boss and was let down – I’d read about big vibrations with deep rumbles and I expected delivery. We know how much I love big rumbles and lots of power. And they were rumbly, but the large amount of silicone meant that the vibrations had a lot of fighting to do to stay strong and avoid dampening. I was so underwhelmed by my G4 vibrators that I never even reviewed them. So when the Patchy Paul G5 was offered for review I jumped on it, hoping for something to back me up on my overall feelings about the company. 

You see, I’ve always liked Fun Factory, in theory. Their vibes have never worked for me but this pissed me off a lot less than when Lelo vibes didn’t work for me. Fun Factory has always had cool designs, albeit with some high prices (remember the Sinnflut line?). They’ve always been different enough, unique, “fun”, but without boasting lame/non-existent “revolutionary tech” or trying to claim absolutes. With the G5 vibrators you can experience flex and give, unlike the silicone-skin-over-hard plastic like Je Joue, Lelo, and many more. 

Fun Factory also usually has a very draggy silicone – matte finish with a texture that means even I need lube. Fun Factory silicone is a bit of a lube hog, so be sure to stock up – water-based, hybrid or coconut oil is fine. But unlike a lot of companies, Fun Factory doesn’t focus on the gendered colors. Patchy Paul G5 is available in Neon Orange and Green, as well as light Pink. 

Another upgrade to the Patchy Paul G5, and the whole G5 line, is that the controls are just a lot better vs the G4 line and even many other vibrators on the market. They kind of idiot-proofed it. If you try to just hit the + to turn it on, the red Fun button blinks to remind you to start there. This isn’t brand new for Fun Factory; the Stronic Drei and Amorino had it as well.  These are vibes for people who hate to read a manual just to work their vibrator. Unlike the G4 line, now there are two obvious little metal nubs that show where the Click n Charge magnetic charger will go (and the magnets are quite strong). You can’t screw up using this vibrator. You can hand this to anybody, even a total vibe newbie, and they’ll immediately understand how everything works. When you hit the Fun button it starts out in the middle of its vibratory range – there are two lower settings and 3 higher settings. Once you hit the + enough to get into Pattern Land you can cycle through the 6 basic patterns by continually hitting the + button. To leave Pattern Land you have to hit the minus button. Again it’s not super complicated and didn’t ever leave me feeling like I had to turn the vibrator off and back on again just to get myself back to straight vibrations.


So how does it feel?  The vibration power level is a significant improvement over the G4 line and a huge improvement over less expensive Fun Factory vibrators. The motor seems to be about in the middle so in the G4 line the tip felt bland. In fact the difference in vibration oomph is enough to make me even more disappointed now with the old G4 line. You have no idea how badly this upgrade was needed, for such a pricey vibe. With the Patchy Paul G5 on high you do feel vibrations in your hand, but it’s not overwhelming. When inserted it does suffer from vibration dampening, a good bit more than the Rosa Rouge, but it’s still powerful enough to stimulate the clitoral legs for me. Because the motor is in the middle I am feeling most of the vibration right at the vaginal entrance, since I can’t insert the entire length.  I was able to use the Patchy Paul G5 both as an external vibrator and an internal vibrator – it wasn’t as great as using the L’amourose Rosa this way, though. The vibration dampening I experienced with the first inch or two just from my labia-o-steel was enough that in certain positions I didn’t feel enough oomph to get me to come.  The design is awesome for those who want to work up to using more length and width internally  – the nose is a flexible just-shy-of-1.5″ curved tip which narrows back to 1″ wide and then slowly gets fatter up to about 1.6″ but that’s not until you get close to 5″ insertable. I feel like the max insertable length is more like 6 or 6.5 inches versus what FF claims and I don’t see it getting up to the 1.75″ max width they list, either. 

There’s a good amount of flex for the top 3 inches so if you need solid vibrators that can apply firm pressure to your g-spot, this might not be your thing but if your g-spot, a-spot and/or clitoral legs respond to deep, penetrating, powerful vibrations? Patchy Paul G5 is your jam. It’s an easy-to-use, powerful vibrator that is pretty versatile, too.  Would I recommend it over the L’amourose Rosa, though? Honestly no. However the Rosa is $40 more (while the warming Rosa Rouge is full $100 more than Patchy Paul G5) and I understand that when the price climbs closer to 200 it’s hard to justify. The Patchy Paul G5 doesn’t have reliable all-over vibrations like harder vibrators (such as the Lelo Mona 2 or Je Joue Uma) but it is definitely more powerful than the Mona 2 or Uma and definitely more rumbly. I feel that if you don’t have the fleshy outer labia like I do which can provide a decent amount of vibration dampening (by surrounding the vibe tip with flesh) then you could easily use the Patchy Paul G5 externally and experience deep, powerful vibrations that slightly eclipse even the Rosa. While I would recommend this vibe I still found myself abandoning it during testing for the L’amourose Denia (because my Rosa Rouge was dead).

Patchy Paul G5 isn’t a quiet vibrator. In quiet room you’d be able to hear it from under the covers and probably on the other side of a closed door. It is more noisy than Lelo, L’amourose, Je Joue and even Jopen vibes.  If you need stealth sex toy time you’re going to want to turn on music or buy a white noise machine. I feel like Patchy Paul G5 really could claim the title of “the Barry White of vibrators” – yet they don’t, because Fun Factory isn’t a pretentious asshole company.


My thanks to Shevibe for sending me the Fun Factory Patchy Paul G5 in exchange for my honest review.

May 272015

Jopen Envy Fifteen Vibrator ReviewI’m reviewing the Jopen Envy Fifteen because I’m on the hunt for a decent remote-controlled vibrator; it’s what people ask for the most, it seems! The thrill of wearing a vibrator in public is a gateway kink for many people; it’s one I can get behind! But sadly when it comes to remote control sex toys the market is lacking. A really great RC vibe needs to nail down these three things:

 *  A remote that allows the remote holder to know what’s going on – what setting the vibrator is one, basically.

 *  A remote connection that stays through clothing, flesh and ideally from across the room. Bonus points if it works through a wall.

 *  A comfortable vibrator shape with decently rumbly, decently powerful vibrations.

Con – Weird Shape

Every Jopen vibe I’ve tried has been very powerful and pretty rumbly so I had high hopes for “rule 3” to be met with the Jopen Envy Fifteen – and we almost had it. Look at the shape of the design. Where would YOU expect the vibrations to be centered? If you’re like me, you expected the vibrations to be in that portion that sticks out a bit – it would be a great design for those (like me) with full labia and a “buried” clitoris. But strangely the vibrations are focused at the other end. So this leaves the protruding part to sit at your vaginal entrance, I guess. The design sucks for me because of my full labia, chubby mons and buried clit. It’s vibrating my labia, right now. 

Jopen Envy FifteenPro and Con – Powerful!

Yes, the vibrations of the Jopen Envy Fifteen are powerful (no, not Tango-powerful, not quite). I didn’t think I could ever say this, but they’re ….. TOO powerful. The first setting is barely anything. I can feel that something is happening with the vibrator, but that’s it. The second setting is still very mild to me; kinda rumbly, but mild – although very sensitive folks will find it to be a great setting. The third setting jumps up to a level that could make moderately sensitive people orgasm. Already the third level is more powerful than some of the more mild vibrators I’ve owned. The fourth setting isn’t noisy, but it can be heard if you’re sitting on a chair and the room is quiet. It’s moderately rumbly and decently powerful. The fifth setting is rumbly in hand but between my labia and under pressure, it’s only moderately rumbly with a hint of buzzy. The fifth setting is pretty powerful. All of the settings can suffer from vibration dampening when surrounded by flesh, but it’s not too bad. I actually was able to orgasm on the fourth setting by wearing it in a way that wouldn’t be discreet in public (half of it sticking out of my labia like a mini cock, the red light blaring away) and putting a lot of pressure on my clitoris.

So it’s probably too powerful for those who are moderately-to-very sensitive IF you don’t want to actually orgasm in public. If you do, you might not last long. For those who are more orgasm-resistant, this might be the panty vibe that gets you off if that’s your aim.

Con – Controls Aren’t Intuitive

I first thought my Jopen Envy Fifteen was broken. You turn it on by pressing and holding the button on the vibrator for 4 or 5 seconds. Nothing will happen, except that the red light will be brightly shining. You then press the middle button on the remote, but a slow, deliberate button push, not a quick click. You’ll want to hold the remote in your hand by the fat end! Be warned – when you turn it on, it starts off at the THIRD setting. Here’s where it gets odd – to decrease the power level, you first have to click the top button (“up”) and THEN click the bottom button (“down”) to get to the first setting. Clicking just the top button will take you to the second setting if that’s all the lower you want to go to start off.

You can then click on the center button for 6 different patterns. You can also use the increase/decrease while in a pattern to change the vibration intensity. The red light on the vibe will blink along with the pattern, also.

Con – It’s a Bitch to Turn Off

Here’s where it gets annoying – the only two ways to turn it off are: 1. Press and hold the button on the vibrator for 3 or 4 seconds 2: Click the middle button on the remote 7 times (if you’re not in patterns) to cycle through all of the patterns to get it to stop vibrating. The red light on the vibrator will remain lit until it’s turned off at the vibrator.

The red light on the remote does sort of let the remote-holder know what’s going on. If the remote’s red light doesn’t light up, it means you’re going in the wrong direction with the buttons or you clicked it too quickly.

Con – Bright Red Light!

The vibrator of the Jopen Envy Fifteen has a very bright, red LED light under the silicone skin. Yes, it can be see through panties. It can be seen through most pants. The button is going to be roughly in the area of the vagina so it’s probably not visible to others if you wear it correctly and you’re standing up but I’m betting there would be situations where the red light would be visible. In a dark place, even more visible.

Pro – Remote and Vibrator are rechargeable

They include a Y-shaped recharging cable that plugs into both the remote and the vibrator, and then the other end is USB. Too many remotes take weird batteries, so this aspect is nice.

Pro – It Might Work Really Well Under a Harness

I can see the design of the Jopen Envy Fifteen working for many people when they’re wearing a strap-on harness. Not me, again, but if your labia is not chubby, if you don’t have a buried clit, this could work well for you to use while wearing a harness.  I can totally see someone buying this for the sole use of wearing it while they’re strapping on. Between the remote and the design, it would be easy to use and pretty comfortable.  Yes despite the fact that the design doesn’t work with my labia, it is overall comfortable.

Pro and Con – The Remote & Connection

Except for the fact that the light on the remote will not light up if you cannot go any higher/lower in vibration intensity, the remote holder doesn’t really know what the wearer is experiencing. If you get distracted you’ll forget where you left them.

The connection stayed put through my clothes, so that’s good. The remote is advertised to work up to 16.5 feet away which is……meh. It’s alright. It’s not going to work through walls and it’s not going to work from across a long room, but it’s decent. The remote is small and easy to hold, though. There’s that.

Final Thoughts

Overall, unless you’re using this during strap-on play OR you have minimal labia/mons and a prominent clit, I don’t think I can recommend the Envy Fifteen. Despite the price being pretty good (under $100), it has flaws that make it frustrating. The vibrations in use aren’t as rumbly as other ENVY/LUST items, and the jump from “tease” to “whoa” is a big jump. I think it’s going to let you down more often than not. Given the really bright red light, I don’t think it’s suitable for play in a low-light setting in public. I’m not loving the design because it rules out anyone with a buried clit. For public play, the remote sucks. For many uses, the remote sucks.

I’m going to keep trying out remote control vibrators to see if I can find one that isn’t awful. I’m losing hope, though. Industry, step up your game!! If someone could come out with a remote like Dorcel’s, with the connectivity and range of the Lelo Sensemotion, and a vibrator with rumbly vibrations in a decent range from teasing to decently powerful with gradual steps in intensity combined with two styles – one suited for innie clits and one suited for outtie clits – we’d be in business. But I have a feeling I’m going to be long gone from this world by the time sex toy companies recognize that not all clits are outties and design toys accordingly. Next in line for this style will be the L’amourose MAE – think it can impress me?


Sep 302014

Tenga Iroha MinamoTenga asked me to review their new insertable line, the Iroha Minamo and Iroha Mikazuki, the sisters to Tenga Iroha’s original debut trio of “soft touch” clitoral vibes, the Midori, Yuki and Sakura. This is one of those times where a reviewer needs to be objective and look beyond their own preferences. The Iroha Minamo is not something that I personally would be drawn to, but I have had many people ask about a gentle, soft, pliable silicone vibrator. A number of people with vaginas dislike silicone vibrators because too often they’re a hard plastic vibe with a silicone skin over top, and so they choose porous/toxic toys like those made of TPR and jelly because it’s soft enough for them.

Both the Iroha Minamo and Iroha Mikazuki are small and best suited for people who need something slender, something with “give”, something they would describe as “soft and gentle”. The tip has the marshmallow-y plushness that I found myself wishing the Midori had. It’s truly a comfortable vibrator. The vibrations are probably the most intense about an inch and a half back from the tip (at the first “wave” spot). Minamo technically is thicker than Mizaku (review coming Thursday!) but I think it’s only because there’s more plushness – Mikazuki has less squish. These “ocean waves” in the design of the Iroha Minamo are pure squish. There’s squish along the “top” side too, just not quite as much. This is one sex toy that you will want to keep on your desk just to squish and squoosh. 

How is the Minamo so Squishy?

Like the first Iroha vibes, Minamo is covered with a plucky, pliable silicone skin with a polyurethane elastomer underneath. Just like with the Midori, there is an odor (reminds me of latex wall paint) when you first open the packaging, but I left the vibes out for a few days and it mostly dissipated. I don’t have any problems recommending this material combination in terms of safety. Silicone is indeed non-porous, but it’s not impermeable especially to odors. The silicone skin completely covers the elastomer underneath, making this a very body-safe product. I know that the odor can be alarming at first, as we’re told that silicone (vs the cheap, stinky materials like jelly and PVC) is odorless. And it is, on its own. Regardless, the strong smell of the polyurethane elastomer doesn’t last very long at all; it would only bother those absolutely very sensitive to smell. The silicone skin isn’t tight on the vibrator, either, because there’s a weird little joint in the plastic body of the vibe about 2/3 of the way back from the tip which makes the body slightly flexible. I expected it to be flexible like the Je Joue g-ki, I suppose, but it’s not. It’s subtle, and would only really serve to move with your body rather than form a curve that stays put.

The Important Part – Vibrations

It’s a vibrator, so let’s get to the important bit: The vibrations aren’t going to knock your socks off if you need something considerably “more”, but they’re also much better than standard surface-buzzy / weak vibrators. Is it “enough” for me? No. Definitely not as an insertable; borderline as a clitoral vibrator. I would rank it as less powerful than the Lelo Mona 2; maybe about the strength of the original Mona? It’s not rumbly enough for me to compare it to the We-Vibe Tango on any setting. I’d say (from memory) it’s almost as strong as the Eroscillator Plus. The vibrations are definitely noticeable, and will be powerful enough for many folks. 

Is the Iroha Minamo Right for You?

If you could use a little bit of help from a vibrator to get off, you’d like Iroha Minamo. If you’ve never experienced PIV sex or insertable sex toys, you’d do well to start off with Minamo. If you have vaginismus, Minamo is your jam. The tapered size starts out at the tip with an extremely pliable 7/8″ of an inch. At the first “wave” its 1″ wide, then another fraction of an inch, and at the last wave it’s 1 1/8″. The squish, oh the squish. You can apply pressure, but it’s gentle pressure. If your clitoris is sensitive and likes pressure that is easier to control and less likely to bruise? Minamo! It’s a great, versatile vibrator and I’d recommend it for even clitoral use over the little Irohas. It’s because of the design that I love Minamo…..for others, not myself. I’m excited to be able to have something to recommend to those who need something like this.  

Tenga Iroha Minamo

Specs, Deets, and Blahblahblah

The silicone is completely dust/fur repellent. nothing sticks to it. And unlike the first Irohas, the Minamo is waterproof and submersible. The Iroha Minamo is not an anal safe toy, please do not use it as such. The charging process is very discreet, as well. It reminds me a bit of one of the JJ Form 6 iterations. There is a black plastic box, and the USB plug goes on the outside of the box. There is a depression in the box for the vibe to sit and magnetic prongs. I’ve never had a problem yet getting the Minamo to settle into its charging base properly. With a little effort, you can roll up the charging cable and store it inside the black box with the Minamo, for travel. From what I can tell, Minamo is only offered in blue, which is a very pastel blue – my photos aren’t accurate on the color, no matter how hard I tried. I like the Iroha Minamo for what it is, and I hope others do, too. The price is a bit higher than I would like (currently it’s $119.99 at SheVibe) but it is a quality product, and unique.


I was give the Minamo in exchange for my honest review, courtesy of Tenga Iroha. You can find the Iroha Minamo at my favorite retailer, SheVibe. 

Aug 292014

Fun Factory Stronic DreiBeing disappointed by a high-priced much-hyped sex toy that’s seen many positive reviews is nothing new to me. I’m in the extreme minority when it comes to disliking the PalmPower; I’m not one of the legions who would kill for a Mona 2; and I’m not drooling over Vixskin. Yet I was still surprised when I was drastically disappointed in the Fun Factory Stronic Drei. You see, I was hearing words like “thrusting” and “intense” and reading about people basically in love with this line of vibrators–excuse me, pulsators. But when I really finally paid attention to the “thrusting”, I noticed something: The actual “distance” of the movement is no more than 1/2″ at best, and that’s being generous. Add in friction, resistance, etc….and it’s probably only moving 1/8″ of an inch each direction from “start”, if that makes sense.

When I think of thrusting, it’s more ….. well, just more. More depth, more action, more movement. I’d read a reviewer stating that the Stronic mimicked sex, and also Fun Factory states this. Um, no.  It doesn’t. I don’t think most people have that much fine-tuned control over their bodies to only thrust in quarter-inch movements of the penis/dildo.  If I had sex that was this shallow of thrusting, I’d fall asleep. In fact, I damn near did when I used the Stronic Drei. I’m serious. I was trying to concentrate on what I was feeling from it, so that I could better describe it to you. I had no other stimulation going because I wanted to be sure that my g-spot was responding. And I drifted off a little. It lulled me right to dreamland. Maybe this will be my form of meditation! 

Fun Factory Stronic Drei ProfileThe Stronic Drei faces certain movement challenges that the Stronic Eins and Stronic Zwei don’t – the super-textured design creates a lot of drag, in addition to the silicone type. It’s not the silky-smooth LIM type silicone that you’ll see covering most silicone vibrators (like Lelo or Je Joue). You’ll absolutely need lube. It’s also not small in the width department – for a short stint, the tip is ~ 1.25″ but then quickly ramps up to 1.6 or 1.7″ wide.  So maybe, just maybe, I’d have better luck with the Eins or Zwei. But the Drei has that “g-spot hook” that I figured would work better for me. My g-spot is pretty close to my vaginal entrance, and it really prefers upward pressure. Thrusting and stroking will get the job done, but only at a certain angle and level of pressure. I’m not able to get pressure when using the Stronic Drei because well, that would kill the movement.  And since my g-spot is so shallow, 2/3 of the Stronic Drei was not inserted. You’d have to have the whole shaft inserted to have a prayer of that “sword hilt” design reaching your clitoris, as Fun Factory suggests is possible. If you can use this as a dual-stimulation sex toy, then your vulva must be magical.  And according to a study (I assume) Fun Factory claims that 87% of women prefer the pulsator. To what? A dildo? A vibrator? I already knew I’d be in the minority but jeez.  I tried to love it; I attempted many of these positions that Fun Factory suggests for best use of the Stronic, but no dice.

The Stronics move by way of a heavy-duty magnet (health warning: don’t use one if you have a Pacemaker) that jiggles forcefully inside the unit. The slower speeds produce more movement, actually.  And since there’s no vibrating motor, the Stronic is extremely quiet. I just couldn’t find any happy-medium that made my g-spot respond to this thing. I’ve gotta be really honest….if I had spent $200 of my hard-earned money on this, I’d be damn pissed at myself for falling for it.  I’m never going to use this. I really can’t find major flaws with the product itself, the design, or the details….it just doesn’t work for me. It locks for travel; it’s waterproof (submersible!); it’s totally different from anything else on the market; it’s made of safe materials, and is rechargeable; it has a warranty. See? All good stuff. And yet….

This is where I’m torn. Should I recommend it? Clearly, many other people love this. There are reviews all over the blogosphere of people who love their Stronic. I feel a bit validated in hating the Drei because Epiphora dislikes the Stronic Zwei and Drei (but really loves her Eins). I sorta feel like I should try the Eins but….I don’t have sex toy retailers/manufacturers throwing toy review offers at me. I have to be picky about what I ask to review. I’m not about to sacrifice the chance to review two other, maybe three other, sex toys just to try out the Eins. You know I like to be able to compare things, but this time I don’t think it’s going to happen. It took me this long to just get my hands on ONE of the Stronics, I can’t imagine the miracle that would need to occur for me to ever try another.  If you’ve identified with my opinions on other toys; if you think we’re built similarly and respond similarly to stimulation; if the recommendations of mine that you’ve heeded have paid off for you? Then don’t get this. Save your cash and thrust your own dildo.


Thanks to Fun Factory for giving me the chance to try out a Stronic Drei. You can purchase a Stronic Drei, or any of the Stronic line, directly from them; you can also purchase them from my favorite retailer, SheVibe.


If you’ve managed to stumble onto this review without knowing much about the Stronic Drei, or any of the Stronics, you can check out this info pdf from Fun Factory that has all the specs. There’s also a ton of information about each of the Stronics, and their unique attributes, on SheVibe. Just view each item individually to get the full details. I felt that it was more important to tell you about my opinion and experience with this sextoy, than regurgitate the specs and “how it works” info that many people have already posted. 

Aug 062014

PalmPower Wand MassagerAfter reading a number of glowing reviews, some even saying that the PalmPower is their new favorite vibrator, I broke down and tried it. I’m not really a fan anymore of being tied down by a cord, so I had ignored this thing for awhile. PalmPower Wand Massager is made by BMS Factory, makers of that “PowerBullet” you keep seeing in Jopen, Leaf, and other vibes. I had been interested in trying out this design for some time now, back when CalEx was making it. Yes, from everything I can see, the PalmPower is the same thing as the CalExotics Couture Inspire just in a better color scheme, thankfully1according to BMS a few years ago, the only thing as powerful as the Vanity VR6. Since I loved the VR6 (internal arm only, though) I assumed the PalmPower / Couture Inspire would have the same deep, rumbling vibrations.

I was mislead.

Yeah, PalmPower Wand Massager is super strong. And it, at times, has deep, rumbling vibrations. But something is getting lost in translation here, and I can’t put my finger on it. It does feel rumbly on the lower levels, but only on the sides of the cap. The top of the cap has drastically less vibrations on the low-to-mid settings. On high, it’s all a blur. On high, the PalmPower Wand Massager feels identical to the Magic Wand –  just a smaller head.

But the problem with the more pleasing vibrations in the lower range being more rumbly and lovely on the sides, is that now you can feel that cap’s edge since you’re using the sides of the head. If I were to call it a “seam”, it would be the most obvious seam in sex toy history. I found it quite irritating in use. I could feel it, pinching and making me itchy. I kept trying to press it harder against my vulva, trying all levels of power in an attempt to orgasm, but it was so much more difficult than it needed to be. This could be because of the way I’m built, and maybe not everyone is irritated by this. But I am.

And then when I removed it from between my labia, the silicone cap came off.

*sigh* I suddenly have labia of steel?

To make matters worse, it’s tricky to get the cap lined up just so so that it fits on there properly.  I can understand, I suppose, why they made the design this way. It allows for other caps to be put on. They have a set for body parts and a set for genitals. The body parts set did nothing for me, but I don’t really use a wand massager for my hands. So I tried out the caps for dual stimulation with much hope. I figured that this would allow me to harness the power for good, er, I mean, concentrate the power where I wanted it. That didn’t happen. The part that sticks out, sticks out from the top of the vibrating head…..remember me saying I felt a lot less vibration at the low-to-mid range on top? Yeah. In order to then get decent vibrations traveling through the attachment, I had to crank up the power. And it was no longer the rumbly power I was trying so hard to nail down. Neither attachment worked out for me. It was close, but not quite right enough for me to orgasm without fighting for it.

PalmPower Wand Massager Cap PalmPower Wand Massager Cap
PalmPower Wand Massager Attachments

Another aspect of the PalmPower that I dislike  is the single button. You have to press and hold to increase the power. It can be easy to screw this up mid-use and then it turns off on you altogether because you just clicked the button once. I accidentally turned it off a lot during use. The ramp-up to full speed also seems to go on forever. It’s the vibrator version of the longest pee. I clocked it at 8 seconds. Paltry in the grand scheme of things, but annoying mid-use if you want to jump straight to full power. And, while the PalmPower is easy to hold, a good amount of vibrations do travel down throughout the handle.

PalmPower Wand Massager Compared to Hitachi Magic Wand and Vibratex Mystic WandAnd yes, despite the diminutive size of the PalmPower Wand Massager, it plugs in to the wall. They do give you a long cord, longer than the Magic Wand. The cord, oddly, isn’t permanently attached. It plugs in via jack to the bottom, which – from reading Amazon reviews  – is pretty confusing to many people who went on to complain about their “defective” unit not holding a charge.  I can’t find these reviews anymore, of course, since it was Amazon and they were being sold by shady sellers, so the listings with reviews are now gone but there were many reviews that complained about the cap popping off, the motor overheating, and other issues with the Couture Inspire. I don’t know which wand came first, or why there are two. I asked BMS, but never heard back, so my review has to go live with questions dangling like a participle.


You must be thinking to yourself by this point “Jeezus Lill, is there anything you like about this or are you just the pickiest twat on the East Coast?” So I’ll tell you yes, there are things I like. I like that half of the head, and the attachments, are silicone. It’s a nice silicone, with not much drag and it doesn’t attract a lot of lint and fur. I actually do like the smaller size; easier to take with you than the Magic Wand, and gets in the way less if you like to use it during sex. It’s certainly quieter than the Magic Wand. The price isn’t awful. At $69.99 on SheVibe, it’s a bit more than the Magic Wand but still much more reasonable than the Doxy Massager. If they would just make the plain head a permanent “cap” and make it the entire head silicone, with the attachments fitting over that – like every other damn wand is made – it would improve the whole thing greatly. For what it is, it’s pretty decent. It’s not in my top 5 or even 10 because the flaws are too flawed for me to love it. If you adore the Magic Wand’s vibrations but hate the short cord or the large size? This is your vibe. So many other people love it, so I must be the only odd person out who focuses on flaws. That’s the only thing that makes sense here. I just want a high-powered, rumbly vibrator that doesn’t have glaring flaws that stand in my way of enjoyment. Is that too much to ask? Oh, wait……



I was given the PalmPower Wand Massager and its accessories in exchange for an honest review thanks to BMS Factories. I recommend purchasing the PalmPower at my favorite retailer, SheVibe.

  1. Inspire was only available in pastel hues of pink and purple. While the PalmPower still has pink, it’s a much better pink to me, the magenta color as an accent to the dark grey
Aug 012014

SedeuxFlareI wanted to review the Sportsheets Sedeux Flare Dildo for two reasons:

1. It’s affordable

2. It’s not fleshtone, pink or purple.

Lofty goals, right? Also, it’s really the opposite of many dildos I’ve reviewed in the past – it’s simple and small. I can’t, and shouldn’t, always review only the things that my vagina loves (if I did that, I would have just stopped at the Pure Wand years ago) but the problem with trying to give a review that’s equal parts objective and subjective on a dildo that is a size I would never love…..well, it’s damn difficult. So I’ve been dragging my feet on writing this, because I don’t hate it and yet I don’t personally love it. But I WILL recommend the hell out of it for the many people who want a smaller dildo. This would be awesome for pegging, and great for vaginal penetration for those who don’t like thick dildos.  It’s only 1.25″ at the head, and closer to 1″ in the shaft.

It’s reasonable to say that the color of your Sedeux Flare might vary from piece to piece. The overall color is a brick/slightly orange-y red, with hints of purple-y opalescent glitter swirling about. The glittery-purple-pearl is much less noticeable on mine than the product photos I’ve seen on various sites. In fact many product photos on retail sites show that the pearlescent coloring is both pink/purple and orange.  But regardless, it’s still a color choice that isn’t horribly gendered and isn’t very common. Mine has much less “fire” to the coloring but it’s still a nice addition, nonetheless.


The dildo I own that is the closest in shape and size to the Flare is the Tantus Silk Medium. The Tantus Silk Medium is listed as 5.25″ long and 1″ wide, while the Sedeux Flare is listed as being 5.75″ long and 1.25″ wide (this measurement comes from the manufacturer; Lovehoney lists it a bit differently for some reason). The slightly angled tip is a bit wider than the shaft; so if you like the Silk Medium but need something a little less straight, the Sedeux Flare would be a perfect choice.

The gentle slope of the head means it should be okay for those sensitive to certain shapes catching their pubic bone, and overall it should be great for those who don’t require girth or extreme pressure on their g-spot. Overall it’s a pretty firm silicone, but the thinner shaft means it has a bit of bend and give while still being firm enough overall to give pressure to the prostate or g-spot. I’ve successfully used Wet Hybrid lube on this, with no detriment to the silicone. You can also pair it with coconut oil if you’re not otherwise using condoms. It can be sanitized in the usual ways.  In short, this is really a very serviceable moderate dildo that’s versatile and comes in a unique color.  So long as you know what you like and need in terms of size, I can’t really find any flaws with the Sportsheets Sedeux Flare. So why don’t I love it? I can’t fully blame it on the width, because the Pure Wand is awesome for me and it’s not what I’d consider a girthy dildo. It’s really down to the length for me. I just simply need something longer – not for insertion, but just for comfortable handling and use with my body type. It’s a great harness dildo, though, and would look smashing paired with a certain Tantus harness.



Thanks to Lovehoney for sending me the Sedeux Flare in exchange for my honest review! Don’t forget, Lovehoney has a great return policy and UK shoppers can get the Sedeux Flare here