This question was very simply asked of me recently on my Formspring. It seems to be a very popular question for men to ask of women. Is it perhaps those that might fall into the smaller-than-average camp doing the asking so that they hear more women say “No, it doesn’t matter” to bring up their confidence? Or are too many men made to think that anything less than 7″ is considered to be small?

Britni recently addressed something similar, regarding being a size queen with dildos but not with bio-cock. I’m pretty much the same as her. I am most definitely a size queen when it comes to my sex toys…but there’s a reason for that. Using a dildo is very VERY different from how I get fucked by a guy. The angle, the force behind it, the speed, etc. When I’m using a really fat dildo, I tend to barely move it at all. I like the full feeling, the pressure. I’ve never fucked a guy with a cock quite as big as the fattest dildo that I’ve used. My husband is fairly well-endowed, and there was a pretty long time period in my life when the first few moments of penetration with him were painful. I’ve luckily moved past that now, but why I did I have no clue.

Too big?

There is, in my opinion, such a thing as way too big when it comes to bio-cock. I have to be perfectly honest with you….if your cock is any more than 8″ long or 2″ around….I’ll likely pass on sex. Especially in length. The vagina can and does expand during arousal and penetration, especially the last 2/3; the cervix will retract as well. The amount of expansion and retraction though varies from woman to woman. Some women can accommodate a 9″ cock…some can only handle half of what I consider my max. To me though whenever I get the ubiquitous cock-shots from Craigslist or dating site emails, if the guy is showing off his monster cock…..I utter an “eeek!” and move along to the next one.

Some positions, for my husband and I, are quite difficult. Doggie style for instance. In that position, if he’s not careful, he’ll bang my cervix and it’s quite painful. And sex isn’t as fun for either of us if we have to focus on being careful.

Too small?

“It’s not the size of your cock, it’s how you use it” is true 97% of the time. But back in the day I can recall being with a couple of guys whose cock was shorter and thinner than I was accustomed to…..to the point where I had to actually ask “is it in yet?”. Either they were unskilled or what, I’m not sure but I do know that there is a “too small” for me…… However, I’ve yet to meet a man again who was that small and it’s not common. “Too small” in my opinion is less than 4″ long and less than 1″ wide. But that’s only my personal opinion and my vagina.

Average is not Average

Considering that the average length of the human male penis, aroused, is ~5-6″, the word “average” shouldn’t ever be taken here as derogatory. Average is more than fine with me. After all, my g-spot is probably only about 2″ deep, and the most concentrated nerve endings are in the first couple inches of the vagina. There are positions to change up the depth of penetration during sex and also affect the snugness of the vaginal canal during penetration.

One of the things that I feel bad about with my husband’s length is that I can’t really get much of his cock in my m0uth for a blowjob. I can’t deepthroat. Guys who fit into the average range are more likely to consistently receive a “full coverage” blowjob, where someone can meet their nose with pubes, lol.

We all have our hang-ups and fears about our body parts during sex. Porn can contribute sometimes to these hang-ups, seeing as how they tend not to show men less than 7″ in porn. Guess what guys? We’re not all multi-orgasmic from penetration like the women in porn. We don’t expect you to shoot your load across the room. We don’t expect John Holmes-sized cocks to be hiding out in your pants. Porn is a caricature, often times. (this is why I prefer amateur porn)

Tags: cock, random thoughts, sex

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For as long as I can remember, I’ve had this bizarre, twisted fantasy. The roads leading to it were different, but the end result the same: a stranger fucking a very willing me in my bed in the dead of night. I would never see much of him. Perhaps the strangers intent had been rape but instead he’d happened upon a half-naked horny girl……(me) one who was already wet, already willing and able. These fantasies have roots in a time when I didn’t fully understand the mechanics of sex but I knew I wanted it. Before I even knew how to pleasure myself properly, I had firm belief that this rough stranger could please me.

I’d wondered how I could live out this fantasy…make it reality and yet still make it safe despite the underlying danger in it. Even if I’d spoken to the man before online I still wouldn’t *know* him and be able to trust him. Trust that it would be just him that night. Trust that he wasn’t a complete psychopath. I came close once to setting something up but I chickened out at the last minute. I don’t think I could safely pull this off without involving a third party. A third, trusted party who would vet the stranger and who would keep a far-away eye on the scenario.

I pictured myself waiting for the stranger in one of those picnic pavilions we have here in parks. Sitting on the top of a picnic table, facing away from wherever he would be coming in. I would be wearing a summer dress and nothing else; easy access to a shaved cunt and braless tits just about to pop out of the top of the dress. I would hear his footsteps and not see him. I would feel a heady mixture of equal parts fear and arousal take over my body. My body would be humming in anticipation of his touch as his footsteps drew closer. He wouldn’t say a word to me. Just come up to me and……

(you finish it…..)

Tags: erotica, microfantasy, sex

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It’s no secret that I don’t possess “normal” brain chemistry. If you want to label it, the best label is ADD-Inattentive with a side-order of fibromyalgia (body disease but also affects the brain and can act like ADD) and an occassional helping of some other as-yet-unnamed disorder. I’m not easy to treat with meds. I’m a puzzle and doctors don’t usually want to spend the time on me. I’m not responsive or overly responsive to many meds, thanks to the fibromyalgia. And so, since brain chemistry affects sex drive, mine is like a rollercoaster.

But my husband….he’s also got a dopamine-deficiency disorder. Which exact label, we’re not sure. His acts different than mine and gets treated differently from mine. He’s more susceptible to outside sources affecting his chemistry levels….from food/sugar/caffeine to emotional stresses and lack of sleep.

It’s not easy being a couple. I think he has more patience than me, because I’m losing mine. Back in December he had a big ole upswing and was better than he’d been in years. Our relationship was great, I was pleasantly surprised to be able to rely on him for husbandly duties like coming with me to visit my mother. And sex. It was more often, and better. But then a month or two later, his shitty job and his difficult programming class started to get the better of him. And it’s gone downhill. Everything.

I’m walking on eggshells. Silently losing patience and, for brief moments, respect. But then I remember that he can’t control his brain chemistry any more than I can. But then I have moments of “But *I* work and *I* go out shopping and *I* do XYZ…..why can’t HE??” and the cycle starts all over again. And the health of us individually is failing, but also the health of our relationship. I can’t even recall when we last had sex; it might be a month or two months, I’m not sure any more. We spend our evenings in different rooms of the house. He babbles on about hockey because it’s one of very few outside sources that stimulate his adrenaline and dopamine in a good way. He babbles and I tune out because as much as I want to care about something he likes, I just can’t care about hockey, lol.

I get advice but it doesn’t help because only he and I can figure us out and what to do for us. Nothing can be forced or wrenched into place. It’s true, I’m losing my patience with him and the state of things. But I’m only human…right? It doesn’t make me feel any better though about losing my temper and patience and blowing up. It doesn’t make me miss “us” any less.

If you’ve gone through this, how did you come out the other side in tact?

Tags: hubby, marriage, real life, relationships, sex

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So with my new, bionic arm I apparently took my pain-free status for granted, and over-used it. “Hey! I can pick up 2 containers of milk with one hand!” sort of over-use. Starting yesterday my whole arm started bothering me. Ache and pain and nerve pain and muscle fatigue…by the time I got home from work I was miserable. So instead of hockey, he laid with me in bed. Massaging my arm and gladly offering up something for me to squeeze – I don’t know what it is about this sort of pain/irritation/tension but when I stretch the muscle it’s like scratching an itch. So stretching, pulling, and gripping a squeezie ball are all lovely things. Instead of a squeezie ball though…..I used his cock (don’t worry, due to the on-going elbow problems my grip with that hand is pretty weak). Poor guy, he got so teased ;)

When he has muscle soreness and bad pain, sometimes we end up focusing “treatment” on his cock. An extended foreplay session does many things for him – redirects blood flow from the irritated muscles; overwhelms his brain with pleasure signals; increases his dopamine**. Even though I wasn’t really aroused, I agreed to let him try that trick on me. He brought out the Hitachi and after we determined that I hated the way it felt on my arm, it traveled south for his original idea.

Soon though it became clear to me that the Hitachi wasn’t going to get me off.

I know.

I KNOW!

Not even with the added stimulation of a cock against my g-spot.

So I had him use one of my newest toys, the Eroscillator. It took some direction to adjust his style – unlike the Hitachi, the Eroscillator can’t be used to apply pressure. The more pressure, the less it oscillates. And while I was indeed enjoying the sensation, and feeling close at some points, it wasn’t working out. He, however, was enjoying my eye-rolling bed-writhing desperation.

He had me on my back and him in the somewhat-sitting up position, leaned back so that I could get the vibrator to my clit. At first I thought he didn’t understand what I meant, because he wasn’t sitting up straight enough to give me enough room to manipulate and position the Eroscillator. We couldn’t achieve that perfect angle of penetration in which he hits my g-spot so wonderfully but where I can also have a vibe on my clit…so, we gave up yet again. He was so stimulated that he couldn’t stand much more and so the Eroscillator was tossed aside as he pounded my cunt, working for his orgasm.

My turn again! Attempt 3 had me reaching for my Climax Twist vibrator, and I instructed him to grab another one of my new toys, the Nobessence Seduction dildo. The Climax provided that gorgeous, low rumbly vibrations and wasn’t overkill. The Seduction massaged my g-spot so perfectly. As I begged “faster” “harder” “more!” I felt my orgasm come on, a mere minute or two after we began with this combination. A thunderous orgasm overtook me as he kept up with the dildo and I with the Climax for the first big wave.

Oh sweet jesus that was good. If I hear one more “scientific study” saying the g-spot doesn’t exist, I’ll do very bad things. I know damn well I have a g-spot and I know how to use it. That combination of stimulation – that blended orgasm – it’s something so intense that my recovery reaction is a bit……

….bizarre.

I laugh.

Not just a giggle for half a minute….

Picture a combination of the scene in Willy Wonky and the Chocolate Factory (the old one) when Grandpa and Charlie are floating and laughing, and the scene in Mary Poppins when they’re all floating and laughing (“I Love to Laugh!). That was me. Tears running down my face, laughing like I couldn’t stop…big and loud and infectious. For like… 10 minutes. I don’t understand it; it’s not a common reaction. Except I wasn’t physically floating. Woulda been cool though!

In between my laughing fits he asked me how my arm felt. My response was a dopey “What arm? I have an arm?” In the end though something in the whole of the evening helped because I no longer felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin from the anxiety of the muscle tension and pain, and it did indeed hurt a little less. Hey! I found a new physical therapy routine!

Oh, the cruel evil twist?

As he was in that sitting-up position and I’m thinking to myself “why isn’t this working like it does in porn??” he was also thinking the same thing. He couldn’t “sit up” and get far enough back for the necessary space while also allowing for vigorous fucking. And that day we realized….that is “porn sex” and not to be attempted by 30-something amateurs. Poor thing is limping around today with a groin pull/ache that hurts somethin awful. At first he was embarrassed to admit that, until I reminded him that it’s something to be proud of.

But I don’t think we’ll be using medicinal sex for it!! Poor guy needs to rest up.

*Definition of Panacea

**Besides the sheer pleasure you get from having an orgasm, the body takes it a step further by enhancing the endorphins and other hormones that elevate the mood. The chemical Oxytocin is a natural opiate that is released during sex and becomes quite copious during an orgasm. It is a powerful pain reliever and is compared to morphine. It breaks down like this: more sex – less pain.Woohoo!

Tags: being sore, g-spot, hubby, real life, real live sex, sex, When a higher price tag is really fucking worth it

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Photographer unknown

I had decided to start adding to my erotic art photography portfolio. Since my end results were primarily high contrast black and white, I wanted to delve into a more licentious subject matter. Porn can easily become art with just a small change in lighting and removing the color from the prints.

I wanted to photograph the contrast between the flesh of a hard-bodied male and a soft, curvy female. The two posing for me did not know each other. I knew each of them in my own weird social circles, though, so their comfort level with me translated well into a pseudo-comfort with each other. And their bodies looked exquisite together.

I made them hold poses for 5-10 minutes, sometimes difficult poses, until I got the angle of light and the angle of the shot “just so”. The proximity of their nakedness and my scrutiny resulted in this beautiful agony of arousal for them both. I asked if they would feel comfortable doing some poses of vaginal penetration for me, and they readily agreed. His thick cock and her diminutive outer labia really lent a “skewered and spread wide” filthy quality to the joining of the contrast in flesh. Her cunt was a glistening, split peach just swallowing his marble hard cock.

Each penetrative pose that I had them hold for such agonizingly long minutes added to their subtle desperate arousal. I wasn’t stupid; I knew what I was doing, what I was creating. She was laid back on a table, while he was standing. Her ass raised up off the table a few inches, and her legs wrapped around his hips for added support, left her body in this downward slant away from him. I had them hold a position of his cock halfway inside of her. As I stood next to her head I bent forward to get a different close-up angle and my long hair trailed over her breasts. I could see the controlled, but rapid, rising and falling of her chest as she did her best to remain stoic. Almost imperceptibly she started pumping her hips to get the friction her cunt was craving. I laid a cool hand on her mound, looked back at her, and sternly told her to be still – she was blurring the shot. Privately though I was grinning; I was pulling their strings so well.

I asked them to adjust slightly so that the current position was more exaggerated – I wanted to get a different angle and needed more space but the same depth of penetration. When I noticed how very wet she was, I used one finger to redistribute it from her cunt opening up to her clit and labia. A firm, slow, touch that teased his cock and her clit. As I did it I locked eyes with him; we smiled at each other when we heard her whispered moan as my finger grazed her swollen clit. It was his turn to groan when I sucked her juices off my finger before continuing. When I looked at her I could see the pink flush creeping across her breasts and face, I knew her breathing was more labored. She looked so beautiful, so overcome with lust, so tortured. I moved the accent light, I slowly walked around them to snap a few more shots. I instructed him to slowly penetrate her almost to the hilt and then lean his body backward. When he did this, I watched her face. Her eyes closed and her lips parted to a slight “o”; the furrowed brow came next and I snapped a few photos of her face for my own use. Then I spread her labia around his cock, a pair of lips in a kiss. Another quick graze over her clit just to be sadistic. A few more shots and I noticed his breathing was getting more shallow and rapid, his eyes closing, his face the same portrait of pleasure as hers.

“What is she doing?” I asked him.

“She’s…..I don’t know….she’s milking my cock….it’s like sex but its…not…” He could barely speak around the controlled effort not to fuck the shit out of her, I presume.

“Carrrrieeee” I taunted. “You just can’t help yourself, can you. You’re trying to come.”

She didn’t answer me. She was lost. I moved and stood right next to him, facing her. I whispered to him to not dare come. She had listened to me; she wasn’t moving her body but I could just make out the movements of her cunt. With my camera held precariously in one hand, aimed at their sexes, I used my other hand to briefly tease and kick her over the edge. With a finger on either side I lightly stroked his cock and let my fingers trail down to do the same to her clit. Back up, back down. My eyes on her face, my camera much lower. Another few strokes and I stopped so that I could concentrate on taking photos of her coming while stretched out around his cock. She whined her apology and her body began these subtle convulsions as she began to come.

“John, you are still not to come, do you hear me?” To his credit he did not…..until she finished contracting around his cock and I told them we were finished. The outward stroke of his cock exiting her body was the last straw, or perhaps the dam just being released. As he climaxed, he sunk to his knees, cock in hand with this full-body look of sheer relief, frustration and bliss all rolled together. I caught that on camera too, clicking away. More for my personal collection.

I kissed her goodbye, deeply, to let her go shower and get dressed.

“Well, John, if you’ll excuse me I need to go pretend to upload these shots to my computer while I actually go jerk off real quick. You two finished, now I need to.” I said. But he grabbed my wrist and pulled me down to him for a kiss. As my clothes were shoved aside I soon found out that he wasn’t quite satisfied and wouldn’t dare leave me to tend to my needs by myself.

Tags: erotica, fantasy, I came hard after I wrote this, muse, sex, Voyeurism

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