Ask Lilly: Holiday Sex Toy Gift Buying Guide

I get a good number of people who contact me for advice on buying a sex toy as a gift for their partner as a surprise. This really isn’t an easy feat unless you and your partner have already owned multiple toys and you know what they like.

Consider the Size

If you’ve never used toys, the judge by the size of your cock of your fingers. And keep in mind that hard materials like plastic, ceramic, glass, wood and metal can seem a little bigger than they are just because there is no give to the material. If you’re new to toys, don’t go overboard with the girth. If you’ve had a few and want to take things up a notch then do so but with caution.

Consider Sensitivity

Hopefully you and your partner are open and communicating, honest about orgasms and how things feel. Unless you already own vibrators that you know are not powerful enough, always choose ones with more than 2 speeds.

Consider the Price and Quality

Sex Toy Snob Warning: For the love of Pete, don’t buy a questionable brand (like CalExotics, for example) as a gift! But on the other hand, don’t drop a huge amount unless you’re pretty certain they’re going to love it. Reviews, reviews, reviews. Read them! Hunt them down! And don’t always go by the 1-liner blurbs directly on the sites because you never know who really left that comment. Before you weigh the prices and think about going for a cheaper jelly toy, read about phthalates and the possible side effects.

Things to avoid

Specifically, I’d advise against things like the We-Vibe, the Sqweel (or however it’s spelled, the one that’s rotating tongues, ick), anything that looks like a human tongue, and new-to-the-scene companies that seem too good to be true (like the Zini Roae). As tempting as they are, avoid wireless remote controlled bullets/panties, as they are fraught with glitches problems and a serious case of the unimpressives.

Glass Dildos Make Great Gifts

Why? Because they appeal visually, and unless you’re an advanced toy user/owner, it’s something new and exciting. You get to experiment with temperature play and different sensations. They can be so artistic sometimes that you’d feel comfortable leaving it out and they are therefore non-threatening to a novice. Here’s some recommendations:

Andromeda from GoodVibes.com

I love this one for the curves, it would be awesome for g-spot play. Currently it’s $69.99 and it qualifies for free shipping.

The Pink Rotator from EdenFantasys.com

This one offers more girth and a shorter length, with a handle for you or your partner (works best partnered, I think) to help rotate the dildo and massage the g-spot.

Sapphire Falls Graduated Glass Dildo from EdenFantasys.com

I love this one for it’s color, the slight curve, the bloops of shape and the fact that you can use either end – it’s graduated in size so if they can’t handle the 1.5″ then start at the other end and work up to it.

Buy a Vibrator that is Multipurpose

And I don’t mean a “rabbit” style. By this I mean get one that doesn’t require you to have your anatomy laid out a certain exact way for it to work, get a vibrator with varying speeds, and one that can be used internally or externally. Stick with silicone and reliable brands (to see more about this, see my post on How to Buy Sex Toys Online). Here’s a few of my recommendations:

The Climax Twist Vibrator from Babeland – On sale!!

I love this vibrator, it’s probably my favorite rechargeable vibrator. It’s like a massager, but it bends to a 90 degree angle and has two working ends. (review here). And Babeland has it on sale as of this writing, so hurry! It’s a great sale, down to $59.99.

Harmony Bullet Vibrator from EdenFantasys

I love this bullet because it can get me off at any speed due to the type of vibrations – deep and rumbly and lovely. Buy it in black, the issue I talked about it my review with it glowing was only true of the white one (I now own the black).

Fun Factory Rechargeable Mini “Bubbles” Vibrator from EdenFantasys

Internal, external, short yet fat it gets great reviews and seems very versatile. Silicone, reliable company and rechargeable all boost up its cool factor.

LELO Mona Vibe from EdenFantasys

EF sells it for $135, so while it’s generally more than I’d recommend spending I think it can be worth it. I like the Mona better than the Gigi for g-spot stimulation; the vibrations are really similar to the Gigi but just a hair better – just a hair deeper/stronger, and enough for me to get off clitoraly with this. It’s great internally, it’s great externally and it’s reliable.

Want to Wow them? Can you splurge? NJOY.

I don’t care if you get an anal plug, the Pure Wand, the Eleven or the Fun Wand just invest in Njoy. DO IT. You’ll love it. I promise.

Need more?

Read up on how to choose a dildo for beginners and get some recommendations on those. And anything in the Men’s Toys category are ones I’d recommend for a guy in addition to a Tenga Egg as a stocking stuffer.