Missed Connections and Long Shots
{no HNT this week, outta pics and haven’t had the time or ability to take new ones. next week!}
Ah, Craigslist. Such hope, such possibility, such fodder for snark.
A couple months ago I mentioned this young guy who works here in my office. At first I just thought it was cute but I brushed it off with “He’s too young”. But then the old wheels…they start a turnin’. And by the time I figure out that yeah, I could go for some of that, he’s seemingly cooled off. Maybe? I can’t tell. Playing hard to get now that I glance back and flirt a little too, or did he cool off because of all the wedding talk? From the time I started planning the wedding, I was talking about it to the girls in my aisle, a couple desks back. He sits on the other side of the cube wall, the other aisle….so he heard most of it. Aww what a good little boy, not wanting to flirt with a married woman *snickers*
So I took a plunge and posted this up on Craigslist. I attached a pic too….the one I put in that post about him. Sure it’s cleavage only but I figured that if he was reading the post, he would know by that photo that it was me.
Post title was “For ‘M’ on the [redacted] floor” and it listed my age and city.
This is SUCH a long shot.
Both for you even reading this, and being interested.
We both work in [redacted] for [redacted], on the [redacted] floor. You’re about 10 years younger than me I think, but I kinda don’t care. I don’t want a relationship (I think you’ve figured out by now that I’m married, but you don’t know that it’s open); I just want an office flirt, the occasional hook-up, etc.
There seems to have been some occasional brief flirtations between us. Looking-but-not-looking, and in general being very coy. I know you chat up a few of the girls your age, so I’m not sure you’re actually interested in an older BBW like me. Is it too obvious though that sometimes I expose a little too much cleavage for your benefit? You think I don’t know that when we’re standing there waiting on that machine, you sneak peeks.
The correct guy will tell me his first name and the name of the building we work in.
I wanna ask you guys something. The men here, please reply….you can even put in a fake email address for this one if you want to remain anonymous when you divulge the truth.
If you browse Craigslist for encounters, or just the missed connections section for whatever reason….would you reply to that post or something similar knowing full well that the post is not for you? Knowing that the poster (me) put that up looking for “M” and not just any guy. If you WOULD reply…..why?
I’m sure you all know that I got replies from guys who knew damn well they weren’t the guy I was looking for. Today I decided to reply to a couple and ask them why. I’ll continue this next week after I hear some insightful comments from my readers.
I wouldn’t even consider replying if it wasn’t obviously meant for me. It’s not like I could somehow fool you, right?
What a bunch of jackasses. I’m looking forward to reading how you deal with them.
~ Oh no they’re not trying to fool. They fully admit right up front, most of them, that they know they’re not “M”
Simple – the guy has nothing to lose by replying. You obviously want some, so maybe he can get your attention. And if you brush him off, what’s the loss? Why not spray-and-pray an email?
Not that I am condoning it, merely explaining it.
~ “spray-and-pray”……….*blinks* ….. that was a field trip into the desperate horny male mind that I just…..wow. wow. LOL
Guys that reply are hoping you are desperate. If you are inclined to post something on craig’s list, maybe you’ll find that one guy you didn’t mean to. The worst case scenario – you say no.
I’m not a guy (obviously) but I’ve been around too many that would have though this way.
I’ve known both men and women who’d do it (provided, of course, they matched the gender requested in the ad), and uniformly because they were terminally lonely.
Personally, I would never reply to this if I wasn’t the intended target. If I were – hold on tight honey – because you’d get the ride of your life.
Guys that do are simply trying to ‘get lucky’ with a girl they think ‘needs it.’ In my world, we call these guys a**hole*.
No, I definitely wouldn’t reply.
But I can’t necessarily blame the guys who do because you do hear stories about things like this where the guy from left field makes a connection. It would feel a little desperate to me, but there are guys out there who are game for most anything.
~ Sure you hear the stories, but are they like the fish stories that end up retellings later with them catching a 3 foot trout when in reality it was a 6 inch rock bass?
I wouldn’t either. Reason? I’m not a desperate idiot. Well, okay, I’m desperate, but no idiot! :P
If I was him and I saw the ad, I’d let you know I saw it. But I wouldn’t do it in email. I’d find a way to approach you in person since it is obvious that you know him and there is something there. I would also approach you if I had decided I didn’t want to pursue anything. You put yourself out for all to see, if he sees it he should be courteous enough to let you know.
But I also know that you will probably get about 280 responses from other guys trying to offer their services if the “one” doesn’t respond.
Have to say I wouldn’t reply either – when it is so specifically aimed at someone it would be wrong of me to try to “sneak in” – just my opinion.
No I would no reply..even if it were for me because I would be too nervous. However sometimes I read those and wish it were for me. Some times us guys are just so oblivious
I have never been to CL but I surely wouldn’t reply if I knew it wasn’t for me.
I can though, see how some cats would. Some guys just want to play the game they want to see if they can get it even though it wasn’t for them, hell it might make them try harder?!
~ Yes, good point. Competition, games, all very testosterone-y.
I think it would be rude to reply to you when you were looking for someone specific, but…. :-) I may be tempted to leave my own posting constructed in a way to see if I could get you to respond, kind of challenge myself to come up with a posting to attract you…
First time responder, long time reader. Love your blog!! Total highlight of my day (when I get home, work probably would not approve!)
Thanks for all your hard work.
~ Awwww thank you!!!! :) Well I wish you’d have started commenting earlier, it’s nice to have another brain to pick
See thats the problem with guys.
Our brains are attached to our dicks, which we think is big enough to attract any woman we want. lol
And if you dont reply to their message, then you must be gay or a cock tease.
I have found age has made me wiser when it comes to the fairer sex
But years ago I prob would have hit you up as well.
Definitely do not reply if it was not me. Being a guy I would be tempted since as Happy says – we do think with our dicks. Depending on how intrigued I was I might try to lure you with my own CL posting to see if you bit.
Normally I wouldn’t think of it but the opportunity to be tagged as a terminally lonely, desperate idiot asshole douche-bag jackass, thinking with his dick, does have a certain appeal.
So, did the intended every get back to you?
~ A certain appeal eh? lol – and you’ll find out soon!
Being somebody who has the distinction of sitting from an unusual vantage point in terms of gender and sex, I can say that in my experience women think as much with their pussies as men do with their dicks.
~ While I will admit to having a high sex drive (especially when it comes to women) I do believe these two things to be fact: There is a higher percentage of pervy perpetually-horny men than women. There is a higher percentage of horny men doing rude, stupid, uncouth, offensive things in the name of “thinking with their dicks” than women. I truly do believe that.
I might respond, but not too pretend to be your coworker, but just to say, “if he’s not interested, I am.”
If I were I guy I would not respond. It would just feel awkward I guess.
I wouldn’t reply, but even if I thought it was meant for me, I probably wouldn’t reply unless you included my name, phone number, shoe size and preferred summertime cocktail.
Honestly, you don’t strike me as somebody who thinks with her pussy (as I so elegantly said it earlier). Just because you seek sex doesn’t mean you’re irrational about it. It’s perfectly rational to want to get laid.