Burlesque Toy Shop asked me to give a few $50 and under “affordable rabbit vibrators” a run-through to see if they stand up in material quality, build quality and so on. Ever since that Sex and the City episode, the Rabbit Vibrator is hailed as the holy grail. Yet it’s probably the most finicky sex toy on the market. I could buy 10 different rabbit vibrators and probably only have 1 fit my anatomy properly.
Burlesque Toy Shop and I looked through the options and chose what we thought might be contenders. The catch? Nothing short of true silicone would do. They sent me the Blush Novelties Ohm Lotus Flutter, the CalExotics Posh Double Dancer and the CalExotics Entice Belle to put through their paces (Picobong Kaya and Toxic Piece of Crap shown for reference, provided by me). All three seem to have passed the flame test; all three run on batteries and all three are admittedly a LOT smaller in size than I expected. After all, the average “bells and whistles” toxic/porous rabbit vibe is twice the size!
CalExotics Posh Double Dancer
Let’s get this one out of the way first. It’s awful. It’s so, so awful. There’s this weird plastic base that extends past the battery cap, and on mine the material is all chewed up and rough. Granted, that isn’t the part that will be inside you, but it makes getting this thing clean and sanitary an impossibility. The weirdness on the silicone next to the seams is also concerning to me. You see how it’s just….well, different? It’s like they glued the halves together, put tape over the seam line while the glue was trying, and the tape left something behind. It doesn’t feel different but I’m still slightly concerned.
It runs on only 1 AA battery, but I’ve seen vibrators running on the same pack a much better punch. The Posh Double Dancer might just win the award for the most wimpy vibrator I’ve ever tried. The motor is in the middle of the shaft, so your g-spot and clitoris receive the least amount of vibrations possible. There’s no motor for the clitoral attachment, and it’s essentially two wibbly antennae. You will get zero pressure, and pretty much feel nothing externally. It has one simple button that has a very loud audible click, and 3 paltry settings. I cut open the vibe once I was done testing it, to see what was what. The little plastic-housed bullet in there actually does have decently powerful (albeit buzzy) vibrations; I’ve certainly had other plastic vibes that weren’t as powerful. But combine the thick silicone skin, the ill-placed single motor, the empty space in the tip….and there’s no way the vibrations are going to amount to much in use. It’s a dumb design.
CalExotics Entice Belle
This one is the tiniest of the three. Possibly good for those with a shallow g-spot who don’t like girth and don’t need a lot of internal vibration. The Entice Belle runs on 2 AAA and also has one single button for use, and of course the “bunny” attachment. There actually is a decent amount of surface-buzzy vibrations coming from the bunny ears but they feel entirely too pinpoint for my tastes. The shaft is …. well, it’s boring. It’s really boring. The Entice Belle is priced a little higher than the Posh Double Dancer; what you get for that extra boost is construction that doesn’t look like a drunk poodle assembled it, and an extra motor with more power. In the end, it doesn’t really matter to me because the vibrations are incredibly surface-buzzy. You would be able to apply pressure to the clitoris with this one, unlike the Posh Double Dancer, but the rapidly vibrating little ears could still be annoying. The single button on the end will cycle through 3 power levels and 4 pulsating settings, and won’t turn off until you press and hold the button for 3 seconds. The noise level is quite tolerable for such a cheap vibrator.
Blush Novelties Ohm Lotus Flutter
I realize the “flutter” bit is supposed to resemble a butterfly but at first glance I can’t help from humming “Oh Canada!”. Even my husband said “Why is there a maple leaf on that vibrator?”. For as pinpoint as the Entice Belle bunny ears are, the clitoral stimulation from the Ohm Lotus Flutter is broad. And weak. Ohm Lotus Flutter is nearly as weak as the Posh Double Dancer. I can’t even figure out where the motor is, or if there’s more than one. At certain random ways of holding the vibrator the motor gets “off kilter” and rattles horribly loud. It’s a shame, because the g-spot stimulation from the shape and size is the best on this one out of the three. The packaging of the Ohm Lotus Flutter is also the best of the three and it even comes with a decent storage bag. But none of this matters when the vibrations are so damn weak. The copy from the box reads: “The soft fluttering stimulator goes from gentle to intense with the touch of a button”. Blush Novelties, I don’t think you know what that word means. Then again, you should never trust any sex toy manufacturer when they use the word “intense”.
Do We Have a Winner?
Burlesque Toys wanted me to see if any of these should be stocked by them, which is why I am not linking to the toys on their site – they’re not there yet. I’m honestly tempted to say that none of these should be considered, but at least the Entice Belle had discernible vibrations — The other two were barely a gentle breeze. I personally dislike the thin shaft and the pointy bunny ears on the Entice Belle, but I know some people love to have those bunny ears split and surround their clitoris. If the motors are the same on the entire CalExotics Entice line, I’d consider recommending the Marilyn or Viviene but without personally handling them I really can’t take a guess. Even though the Picobong Kaya doesn’t fit the “under $50” budget and feels overpriced for what it is, the vibrations are at least fairly decent.
A line of vibrators that we didn’t look into is OVO. They appear to retail for under $50 and I heard from one person that the vibrations were decent. I might end up investigating this line, despite hearing lackluster reviews about the cock rings. Regardless, from what I’ve seen there are affordable rabbit vibrators, but they are terribly simplistic – if you expect rotating shafts and swirling rows of pearls with dual motors and dual motor control? You’re out of luck. Then again, nearly all of those types of rabbit vibes are porous or toxic.
What do you think? Have you ever had an affordable, safe, rabbit-style vibrator?
Burlesque Toy Shop provided me with the CalExotics Posh Double Dancer, the CalExotics Entice Belle and the Blush Novelties Ohm Lotus Flutter in exchange for my honest review.