May 302010
 


There are certain sex slang words that when used in earnest turn me off completely. I hate them no matter what, but if they are used in a hot erotica piece….I lose interest. Thankfully I have never been with anybody that’s dared to utter these in person, it might result in some very unpleasant visceral reactions from me.

At the top tip of my list is the word “dong”. Some people and sites will tell you that there is a difference between a dong and a dildo, and I’m telling you: I don’t give a flying fuck. “Dong” is an Onomatopoeia and I’m not going to use it when referring to a hunk of silicone that I fuck myself with. No.

The rest are just self-explanatory euphemisms for cocks, cunt and asshole. And I hate them. Fully and with the utmost conviction.


What are your words?


ETA: I had to update my own jumble bc I forgot about “titties!!” I do so hate that one, I even wrote about it and I still forgot to add it! Thanks to Bunny for reminding me ;)

May 292010
 

One of my favorite sex toys to review are remote-controlled bullets. Well, calling them “bullets” is a bit of a misnomer, I guess. They’re usually egg-shaped. But I digress.

There’s a big reason why I love bullets: I can nestle it in between my labia and sit there, hands-free, enjoying the vibrations as they rumble on my clit. Mostly hands-free. Most bullets, most of the time, require my help to climb that last hill to orgasm by pressing it and holding it to just that right perfect spot on my clit. I’ve found that, for me, price has no bearing on whether or not a vibrating bullet will get me to orgasm. It’s all about the speed and type of vibrations.

The Vital Bullet is probably about as cheap as you can get. And about as powerful. It’s not in the dreaded “high-pitched buzzy” camp of motors that can leave me itchy rather than aroused. On it’s top speed it might very well be entirely too powerful for women with a sensitive clit. It’s made by WHK GmbH which means……absolutely nothing. The packaging is a cheap plastic blister pack with a cheesy half-naked girl on the insert card; there’s absolutely no brand name visible on the packaging. The package tells you the very basic details: “quiet”, “4-speed”, “powerful” and “100% waterproof”.

This bullet has an odd feature – the bullet can unplug from the top of the remote pack. I suppose this could come in handy if it were a name-brand bullet and you could purchase a replacement bullet-only (since that’s where all the wires that can come loose, reside) but for the low price of $9.95 for a brand new one?….why would you bother? If I had any other remote bullets with this plug feature I’d test to see if they’re interchangeable but alas, I do not. I’ve only found one useful reason to unplug the bullet from the battery pack – if it’s not plugged in, then it can’t be accidentally turned on should you find yourself in a situation where you’re traveling with it and don’t want it accidentally turning on (and you also left the batteries in).

The cord is a mere 20″ long. Most other bullets I’ve owned have a cord around 30″ in length. 20″ is pretty short, especially when one is using it the way I tend to use bullets – tucked into my panties, the cord coming out my waist-band and the pack shoved into my front pocket. The control pack is elementary. A slider that clicks along 5 positions: off, low, mid, high, super. “Mid”, because it’s a thrummy-lower-pitched motor, has actually gotten me to orgasm if I’m super-aroused. “High” is perfect when I need a little more oomph. “Super” is a setting I like but I cannot leave it on this setting once I start to orgasm, it’s just too much. Yes! I said something is too much! (see: Am I becoming more sensitive?? for more info) The actual bullet is about the same size as most other ones I’ve tried like the Bnaughty. It’s a bit noisy but then again, many bullets are. If you’re trying to discreetly use this in a silent bedroom….forget about it. Under the covers though? Nestled under panties and jeans? Doable.

The pack also has a singular red light to let you know it’s turned on. Easy to cover up if need be, doesn’t make the whole hand pack glow like the Harmony Bullet. It takes the standard 2 AA batteries, fits nicely in the palm of your hand with the slider bar in just the right position.

I can’t believe I’m actually saying this but……

I’m recommending a $10 sex toy from a no-name company with terrible packaging.

When you get down to it, though, bullets are one of the very very few sex toys that fall into that range that one can safely recommend. I suggest you buy two, because lord knows how long it’ll last. My Doc Johnson Harmony Bullet has actually been my go-to bullet these days so I’ve not put this one through the ringer. At $10 though it’s no hardship to replace once it does crap out.

Thanks to Edenfantasys.com for sending me this (way too long ago) to review!

May 272010
 

I’ve been traveling a good bit lately. Washington State to see Coy Pink a month ago; NYC back in March; a couple of weekends doing computer work for a friend a few states away and dropping in on Debauched Diva. Of course, certainly not as much traveling as Mollena, who has become an expert on packing. I tried to follow the packing guide on the link she gave (here) thinking that surely if other women can pack for 7-10 days in a *carry-on* I should be able to as well.

Right?

I blame my mother.

No, seriously. Hear me out.

As a kid, our vacations were usually these epic cross-country trips. West, south, northeast, Canada, etc….all done in an RV. Now, granted, we were going to be gone for 2-3 weeks and all but still. She packed everything possible. We almost never had to track down a Kmart to buy a necessary item. Every scenario was accounted for.

I’ve inherited this gene. It also comes from my grandmother who was a bit of a packrat. Upon the death of my grandparents and the estate yard sale to clear out items no one wanted, it became clear the level of packrattiness. She wasn’t a hoarder, per se, more likely a hold-over from the Depression. We found unused items from the 70’s that were kept in case a last-minute gift was needed. I tend to be this way in some regards with my own stuff…it’s law that I won’t need it till I get rid of it. I’m getting better, though.

So when I pack for short trips I try to think of everything. Hot, cold, rain, dressy, casual, lots of walking, an extra outfit, etc. And yes, I’m a bit high-maintenance so my cosmetics take up some space too……face & eye brushes, shadow primer, foundation primer, concealer, foundation, light eyeshadow, dark eyeshadow, eyeliner, mascara, eyeliner sealer, lip balm, lip gloss, lip stain, blush, bronzer, moisturizer, eye makeup remover, fash wash. Hair spray, brush, dryer, curling iron, molding paste. Nail care kit. Shower stuff. Lotion. “just in case I start spotting” supplies. Razors. Powder. Any meds I might need “in case”, plus regular ones. Might as well continue……1 planned outfit, 1 spare outfit, something to sleep in, dressy shoes, a book, my netbook + charger, my phone + charger, my ipod, my camera + spare batteries and uh….well….in case I have a “need”, I do need a couple sex toys, yanno. That’s simple – Pure Wand and either the Wahl or a bullet. Simple, sure…..but heavy (remember, the Pure Wand is 1.5 lbs!).

That’s just for a short weekend overnight.

No, seriously.

Back for the last calendar party, when I was going to be in NYC from Thursday-Sunday, I did my best to trim down and use travel bottles. I still barely fit everything and my bag was heavy as fuck. Then, my travel bottles have started leaking, so I just bought new ones (GoToob, they look pretty awesome but since they’re silicone I’ll have to be sure not to put certain cosmetics). I look at that list above and I can’t truly see anything on it that’s not “necessary”. Ok, perhaps the sex toys. Meh, maybe not. With the new bottles, and a resolve to make myself a travel kit for my makeup (small amounts in tiny jars, they’re all loose powders anyways), I hope to find a way to trim down. Both on space and weight. And of course saving time from making lists, running around packing, and then procrastinating for weeks on fully UNpacking. I basically just need to buy duplicates of everything, that’ll solve the packing & unpacking hehehe

May 242010
 

My main chat partner during the boring work days  he’s not really been around much lately. Pressures and stress from work and home coupled with just being too busy have ended with him uninterested/unavailable to talk much and frankly I think he’s depressed. It absolutely kills me that I can’t help him. I have advice, but he won’t take it yet. I care about him a lot and I hate seeing him this way. I also miss him and see the friendship fading a little in some ways.

So yes…I was finding myself lonely and bored and thought what the hell. I’ll go hunting for a hook-up (or, used to) therefore why can’t I hunt for a penpal, a chat buddy? And so, I did. In true Lilly fashion I was very forthcoming on what I wanted and didn’t want. I told a little about myself and asked for the same in return. After all, what fun is a penpal if they’re incapable of composing a proper paragraph?

Did I find what I was looking for? I found some idiots who didn’t read, of course. I found some that just didn’t appeal to me. I found a few that seemed promising at first and then…meh. I found a couple that held my interest. Nice to talk to, we had some things in common…

But then they fell to the wayside as I somehow found myself in limbo….waiting on the friend to respond. For he’s the one I prefer to talk to, even over the “new friendship energy” of others. By the time I realized that our conversation had fizzled out an hour ago and he wasn’t going to respond to me, I was pretty down in the dumps and no longer felt like answering the emails of my new penpals. Then my trips started. Washington state, and then a trip a few states away for side work, home for 3 weeks and then gone again for a weekend of work, and just now back home. With all the traveling, the prep for travel and recovery from travel and the site design jobs I have, I lost contact with the few that had some potential.

I guess I’ll keep trying. It’s not like I’m looking for a replacement. I just don’t want to rely on him so much, I guess. I don’t want to have to keep reminding myself that it’s not rejection, it’s truly not me, it really is him.


*sigh*

Next…..

e[lust] #13

 e[lust]  Comments Off on e[lust] #13
May 152010
 

photo courtesy of Ms Scarlett

Welcome to e[lust] – Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #14? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

Stuck – Since I first saw the picture he sent me I have had this visual stuck in my head, like a sweet thing lingering in the mouth…. wrists bound, tied to headboard–ankles bound, tied to baseboard– naked, exposed

Animalistic – I grabbed the back of your ponytail like I owned you. No protest. Only a moan. Fuck, how aroused were you? Even your kiss was desperate, wet, passionate; your body was on fire and it showed.

A Hot AfternoonShe took Grady’s hand and guided it between her legs. Grady’s instinct kicked in as soon as she touched Hatty’s tender clit and felt the wetness gathered there.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Confessional: Fixation/AddictionIn porn, both video and photo, I have little interest in the men. It’s the women who get my full attention, who arouse me. I seek them out. I flick past hetero couplings, bored. Blow jobs? Meh. Oh wait, close-up of her pussy? Her coming? Ok I’ll watch now.

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

Thanks for the mansplanation, but I greatly prefer my vibratorHis views on female masturbation (derived, clearly, from absolutely nothing legitimate) are so fucked up, so irritating, and so detrimental, that I want to punch him in the face. It is, truly, mansplaining at its finest.

See also: Pleasurists #75 and #76 for all your sex toy review needs.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

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 Posted by at 10:48 am
May 142010
 

It’s no secret that I don’t possess “normal” brain chemistry. If you want to label it, the best label is ADD-Inattentive with a side-order of fibromyalgia (body disease but also affects the brain and can act like ADD) and an occassional helping of some other as-yet-unnamed disorder. I’m not easy to treat with meds. I’m a puzzle and doctors don’t usually want to spend the time on me. I’m not responsive or overly responsive to many meds, thanks to the fibromyalgia. And so, since brain chemistry affects sex drive, mine is like a rollercoaster.

But my husband….he’s also got a dopamine-deficiency disorder. Which exact label, we’re not sure. His acts different than mine and gets treated differently from mine. He’s more susceptible to outside sources affecting his chemistry levels….from food/sugar/caffeine to emotional stresses and lack of sleep.

It’s not easy being a couple. I think he has more patience than me, because I’m losing mine. Back in December he had a big ole upswing and was better than he’d been in years. Our relationship was great, I was pleasantly surprised to be able to rely on him for husbandly duties like coming with me to visit my mother. And sex. It was more often, and better. But then a month or two later, his shitty job and his difficult programming class started to get the better of him. And it’s gone downhill. Everything.

I’m walking on eggshells. Silently losing patience and, for brief moments, respect. But then I remember that he can’t control his brain chemistry any more than I can. But then I have moments of “But *I* work and *I* go out shopping and *I* do XYZ…..why can’t HE??” and the cycle starts all over again. And the health of us individually is failing, but also the health of our relationship. I can’t even recall when we last had sex; it might be a month or two months, I’m not sure any more. We spend our evenings in different rooms of the house. He babbles on about hockey because it’s one of very few outside sources that stimulate his adrenaline and dopamine in a good way. He babbles and I tune out because as much as I want to care about something he likes, I just can’t care about hockey, lol.

I get advice but it doesn’t help because only he and I can figure us out and what to do for us. Nothing can be forced or wrenched into place. It’s true, I’m losing my patience with him and the state of things. But I’m only human…right? It doesn’t make me feel any better though about losing my temper and patience and blowing up. It doesn’t make me miss “us” any less.

If you’ve gone through this, how did you come out the other side in tact?