Feb 232016

Fun Factory Jazzie vibratorThe Fun Factory Jazzie is just one of my upcoming reviews this year focused on being more inclusive of budgets; of trying to find something that’s decent and affordable. But sometimes there’s not a lot you can say about a sex toy. I find that I can talk more about a vibrator than a dildo, but when I’m kinda neutral about a sex toy then it’s really hard to write about it. And that’s how it is with the Fun Factory Jazzie: this is going to be a quick review because the vibrator is very “entry-level” and simplistic; which isn’t a bad thing, it’s just a thing, and it’s not my thing.

Who the Fun Factory Jazzie is Best Suited For

This is firmly a vibrator for someone who knows they want moderate (some might even call these gentle) vibrations and a slender insertable. I have felt vibrators that are even more gentle than this, so it’s not something I’d consider completely worthless. Fun Factory calls it powerful, but it’s not. Not the weakest sauce on the block, but on a scale of 1-10 I’d put it firmly at 4, maaaaaybe 4.5. Given the other things I currently have at 5 on my scale, I don’t feel it’s quite a 5. I could personally never orgasm with this, but I knew that going in. I think the vibrations are better suited for external stimulation because what’s there is dampened quite a bit when inserted, while the Jazzie as a whole is nice introduction to vaginal penetration. The silicone has a little bit of give, but not very much. It’s also got a bit of drag so play it safe by making sure you have lube on hand.

The Good

I’ve felt worse vibrations. I know that doesn’t sound like high praise, but it’s the truth. I’ve felt better out of 2 AA’s and I’ve felt worse. The size and shape are really great for someone new to penetration; it’s easy to operate and it’s quiet no matter which way you turn the vibrator. Everyone who has owned a cheap, plastic vibe knows what I’m talking about – you hold it one way and the noise level isn’t too bad but then you angle it a little different and it’s like the vibrating motor head is banging right up against the plastic wall of the vibrator and you’re damn certain everyone can hear the thing.

It’s waterproof, even though it doesn’t look like it would be. The Fun Factory Jazzie is $29.99 – not the cheapest vibrator, but for something covered in slightly squishy silicone, this is decent. This will remain on my 35-under-$35 round-up list.

The Not So Good

There’s only one speed. You’d better love it, because there’s only one. I don’t think it would have created a higher-priced vibrator to include a few more intensity levels – one to build up to and yes, even one a little more powerful. I’ve felt some decently strong vibrations from just 2 AA’s, so I know it’s possible. I don’t like how Fun Factory advertises it as powerful, because that feels a little misleading. There’s definitely a market for moderate vibrations – not everyone is a power queen, so why not just own up to what you are? You’ll make the sales of people who want a moderate or gentle vibrator and not disappoint the ones actually looking for something powerful.

The silicone, like all Fun Factory silicone, is a huge dust & pet fur magnet. In fact if you find yourself in a pinch and need a lint roller for your sweater or your pants, at your ankles, where the cats like to lean, this will work nicely. Just a quick rinse under water cleans the fur for another swipe. If you own a cat or dog or bunny, pretty much anything the sheds a lot, be prepared to eventually get a hair or two inside your vagina unless you limit your usage with this to the shower. For the photos I rinsed it off and carried it to the window I would photograph it near and I swear it attracted fur that was on my shirt.

How it Compares

At home I have the OVO D4 and it seems to be a bit more powerful than the Fun Factory Jazzie, so I think that the slender OVO D1 would be comparable to the D4 and also something affordable to consider. Jazzie is actually more powerful than the Tenga Iroha Minamo, but the Minamo is a bit more slender at the tip and is much more soft, without any drag at all to the silicone. Of course the Minamo is nearly $100 more, because of the premium silicone and the fact that it’s rechargeable. My Picobong Moka is nearly twice as powerful than the Jazzie, but noisier, too. The Zizo would be a little closer to the size of the Jazzie and the same motor as Moka but it’s twice the cost and has an infuriating cap-handle.

Pay Attention to the Cap

At first I thought mine was dead, but it turned out I had the cap on backwards. You *can* put it on backwards; it fits, and it closes. It might be wise to put it on backwards if you wanna toss it in your bag but don’t want to remove the batteries. But it won’t work unless the Fun Factory logo is on the same side as the little (hard to see) Off – On – Open. Yes, it turns on and off just by twisting the cap, like the cheap pocket rockets.


Similarly, you can get the Fun Factory Joupie which is the same motor and concept, just a different style. The pokey looking head would be good for pinpoint clitoral stimulation, I bet.

Thanks to SheVibe for sending the Fun Factory Jazzie to me in exchange for my very honest review!

Sep 172015

Patchy Paul G5I finally have a Fun Factory vibrator that I can recommend. I’ve been underwhelmed, overstuffed, had pubic hairs ripped out, put to sleep, and bored. I tried out the G4 version of the Patchy Paul and Big Boss and was let down – I’d read about big vibrations with deep rumbles and I expected delivery. We know how much I love big rumbles and lots of power. And they were rumbly, but the large amount of silicone meant that the vibrations had a lot of fighting to do to stay strong and avoid dampening. I was so underwhelmed by my G4 vibrators that I never even reviewed them. So when the Patchy Paul G5 was offered for review I jumped on it, hoping for something to back me up on my overall feelings about the company. 

You see, I’ve always liked Fun Factory, in theory. Their vibes have never worked for me but this pissed me off a lot less than when Lelo vibes didn’t work for me. Fun Factory has always had cool designs, albeit with some high prices (remember the Sinnflut line?). They’ve always been different enough, unique, “fun”, but without boasting lame/non-existent “revolutionary tech” or trying to claim absolutes. With the G5 vibrators you can experience flex and give, unlike the silicone-skin-over-hard plastic like Je Joue, Lelo, and many more. 

Fun Factory also usually has a very draggy silicone – matte finish with a texture that means even I need lube. Fun Factory silicone is a bit of a lube hog, so be sure to stock up – water-based, hybrid or coconut oil is fine. But unlike a lot of companies, Fun Factory doesn’t focus on the gendered colors. Patchy Paul G5 is available in Neon Orange and Green, as well as light Pink. 

Another upgrade to the Patchy Paul G5, and the whole G5 line, is that the controls are just a lot better vs the G4 line and even many other vibrators on the market. They kind of idiot-proofed it. If you try to just hit the + to turn it on, the red Fun button blinks to remind you to start there. This isn’t brand new for Fun Factory; the Stronic Drei and Amorino had it as well.  These are vibes for people who hate to read a manual just to work their vibrator. Unlike the G4 line, now there are two obvious little metal nubs that show where the Click n Charge magnetic charger will go (and the magnets are quite strong). You can’t screw up using this vibrator. You can hand this to anybody, even a total vibe newbie, and they’ll immediately understand how everything works. When you hit the Fun button it starts out in the middle of its vibratory range – there are two lower settings and 3 higher settings. Once you hit the + enough to get into Pattern Land you can cycle through the 6 basic patterns by continually hitting the + button. To leave Pattern Land you have to hit the minus button. Again it’s not super complicated and didn’t ever leave me feeling like I had to turn the vibrator off and back on again just to get myself back to straight vibrations.


So how does it feel?  The vibration power level is a significant improvement over the G4 line and a huge improvement over less expensive Fun Factory vibrators. The motor seems to be about in the middle so in the G4 line the tip felt bland. In fact the difference in vibration oomph is enough to make me even more disappointed now with the old G4 line. You have no idea how badly this upgrade was needed, for such a pricey vibe. With the Patchy Paul G5 on high you do feel vibrations in your hand, but it’s not overwhelming. When inserted it does suffer from vibration dampening, a good bit more than the Rosa Rouge, but it’s still powerful enough to stimulate the clitoral legs for me. Because the motor is in the middle I am feeling most of the vibration right at the vaginal entrance, since I can’t insert the entire length.  I was able to use the Patchy Paul G5 both as an external vibrator and an internal vibrator – it wasn’t as great as using the L’amourose Rosa this way, though. The vibration dampening I experienced with the first inch or two just from my labia-o-steel was enough that in certain positions I didn’t feel enough oomph to get me to come.  The design is awesome for those who want to work up to using more length and width internally  – the nose is a flexible just-shy-of-1.5″ curved tip which narrows back to 1″ wide and then slowly gets fatter up to about 1.6″ but that’s not until you get close to 5″ insertable. I feel like the max insertable length is more like 6 or 6.5 inches versus what FF claims and I don’t see it getting up to the 1.75″ max width they list, either. 

There’s a good amount of flex for the top 3 inches so if you need solid vibrators that can apply firm pressure to your g-spot, this might not be your thing but if your g-spot, a-spot and/or clitoral legs respond to deep, penetrating, powerful vibrations? Patchy Paul G5 is your jam. It’s an easy-to-use, powerful vibrator that is pretty versatile, too.  Would I recommend it over the L’amourose Rosa, though? Honestly no. However the Rosa is $40 more (while the warming Rosa Rouge is full $100 more than Patchy Paul G5) and I understand that when the price climbs closer to 200 it’s hard to justify. The Patchy Paul G5 doesn’t have reliable all-over vibrations like harder vibrators (such as the Lelo Mona 2 or Je Joue Uma) but it is definitely more powerful than the Mona 2 or Uma and definitely more rumbly. I feel that if you don’t have the fleshy outer labia like I do which can provide a decent amount of vibration dampening (by surrounding the vibe tip with flesh) then you could easily use the Patchy Paul G5 externally and experience deep, powerful vibrations that slightly eclipse even the Rosa. While I would recommend this vibe I still found myself abandoning it during testing for the L’amourose Denia (because my Rosa Rouge was dead).

Patchy Paul G5 isn’t a quiet vibrator. In quiet room you’d be able to hear it from under the covers and probably on the other side of a closed door. It is more noisy than Lelo, L’amourose, Je Joue and even Jopen vibes.  If you need stealth sex toy time you’re going to want to turn on music or buy a white noise machine. I feel like Patchy Paul G5 really could claim the title of “the Barry White of vibrators” – yet they don’t, because Fun Factory isn’t a pretentious asshole company.


My thanks to Shevibe for sending me the Fun Factory Patchy Paul G5 in exchange for my honest review.

Aug 292014

Fun Factory Stronic DreiBeing disappointed by a high-priced much-hyped sex toy that’s seen many positive reviews is nothing new to me. I’m in the extreme minority when it comes to disliking the PalmPower; I’m not one of the legions who would kill for a Mona 2; and I’m not drooling over Vixskin. Yet I was still surprised when I was drastically disappointed in the Fun Factory Stronic Drei. You see, I was hearing words like “thrusting” and “intense” and reading about people basically in love with this line of vibrators–excuse me, pulsators. But when I really finally paid attention to the “thrusting”, I noticed something: The actual “distance” of the movement is no more than 1/2″ at best, and that’s being generous. Add in friction, resistance, etc….and it’s probably only moving 1/8″ of an inch each direction from “start”, if that makes sense.

When I think of thrusting, it’s more ….. well, just more. More depth, more action, more movement. I’d read a reviewer stating that the Stronic mimicked sex, and also Fun Factory states this. Um, no.  It doesn’t. I don’t think most people have that much fine-tuned control over their bodies to only thrust in quarter-inch movements of the penis/dildo.  If I had sex that was this shallow of thrusting, I’d fall asleep. In fact, I damn near did when I used the Stronic Drei. I’m serious. I was trying to concentrate on what I was feeling from it, so that I could better describe it to you. I had no other stimulation going because I wanted to be sure that my g-spot was responding. And I drifted off a little. It lulled me right to dreamland. Maybe this will be my form of meditation! 

Fun Factory Stronic Drei ProfileThe Stronic Drei faces certain movement challenges that the Stronic Eins and Stronic Zwei don’t – the super-textured design creates a lot of drag, in addition to the silicone type. It’s not the silky-smooth LIM type silicone that you’ll see covering most silicone vibrators (like Lelo or Je Joue). You’ll absolutely need lube. It’s also not small in the width department – for a short stint, the tip is ~ 1.25″ but then quickly ramps up to 1.6 or 1.7″ wide.  So maybe, just maybe, I’d have better luck with the Eins or Zwei. But the Drei has that “g-spot hook” that I figured would work better for me. My g-spot is pretty close to my vaginal entrance, and it really prefers upward pressure. Thrusting and stroking will get the job done, but only at a certain angle and level of pressure. I’m not able to get pressure when using the Stronic Drei because well, that would kill the movement.  And since my g-spot is so shallow, 2/3 of the Stronic Drei was not inserted. You’d have to have the whole shaft inserted to have a prayer of that “sword hilt” design reaching your clitoris, as Fun Factory suggests is possible. If you can use this as a dual-stimulation sex toy, then your vulva must be magical.  And according to a study (I assume) Fun Factory claims that 87% of women prefer the pulsator. To what? A dildo? A vibrator? I already knew I’d be in the minority but jeez.  I tried to love it; I attempted many of these positions that Fun Factory suggests for best use of the Stronic, but no dice.

The Stronics move by way of a heavy-duty magnet (health warning: don’t use one if you have a Pacemaker) that jiggles forcefully inside the unit. The slower speeds produce more movement, actually.  And since there’s no vibrating motor, the Stronic is extremely quiet. I just couldn’t find any happy-medium that made my g-spot respond to this thing. I’ve gotta be really honest….if I had spent $200 of my hard-earned money on this, I’d be damn pissed at myself for falling for it.  I’m never going to use this. I really can’t find major flaws with the product itself, the design, or the details….it just doesn’t work for me. It locks for travel; it’s waterproof (submersible!); it’s totally different from anything else on the market; it’s made of safe materials, and is rechargeable; it has a warranty. See? All good stuff. And yet….

This is where I’m torn. Should I recommend it? Clearly, many other people love this. There are reviews all over the blogosphere of people who love their Stronic. I feel a bit validated in hating the Drei because Epiphora dislikes the Stronic Zwei and Drei (but really loves her Eins). I sorta feel like I should try the Eins but….I don’t have sex toy retailers/manufacturers throwing toy review offers at me. I have to be picky about what I ask to review. I’m not about to sacrifice the chance to review two other, maybe three other, sex toys just to try out the Eins. You know I like to be able to compare things, but this time I don’t think it’s going to happen. It took me this long to just get my hands on ONE of the Stronics, I can’t imagine the miracle that would need to occur for me to ever try another.  If you’ve identified with my opinions on other toys; if you think we’re built similarly and respond similarly to stimulation; if the recommendations of mine that you’ve heeded have paid off for you? Then don’t get this. Save your cash and thrust your own dildo.


Thanks to Fun Factory for giving me the chance to try out a Stronic Drei. You can purchase a Stronic Drei, or any of the Stronic line, directly from them; you can also purchase them from my favorite retailer, SheVibe.


If you’ve managed to stumble onto this review without knowing much about the Stronic Drei, or any of the Stronics, you can check out this info pdf from Fun Factory that has all the specs. There’s also a ton of information about each of the Stronics, and their unique attributes, on SheVibe. Just view each item individually to get the full details. I felt that it was more important to tell you about my opinion and experience with this sextoy, than regurgitate the specs and “how it works” info that many people have already posted. 

Feb 252014

Fun Factory Amorino - small and soft, with a shaft shorter than the length of my open handFirst, let me admit that I skim over things often, and can miss a detail the first time around. When I was looking at the Fun Factory Amorino, I kept wondering how it would work, having that band on it while being inside the vagina. I wondered even further when I got the thing in my hands. It wasn’t until I pulled out what passes for a Fun Factory manual that I saw the warning: “Do not leave the band on during vaginal or anal insertion!” Ok anal insertion, absolutely I understand that. But then I’m not the sort to use a “rabbit” styled vibe anally.  So if you’re not supposed to leave the band on for insertion…….?

There were bizarre diagrams of it, but none made sense. According to the FF website: “The gently taut silicone stimulation band is placed between the softly rounded tip and the side bud for clitoral arousal. It externally stimulates the Venus mound and the vaginal lips – this little detail ensures levels of excitement of a special kind.”  Like, a very special Blossom episode, kind of special? Special how, exactly?

And still I said to myself, “I don’t fucking GET it”.

Seemingly unrelated factoid: Threading is an ancient hair removal method. “In threading, a thin (cotton or polyester) thread is doubled, then twisted. It is then rolled over areas of unwanted hair, plucking the hair at the follicle level. Unlike tweezing, where single hairs are pulled out one at a time, threading can remove short lines of hair.”

I think I know what threading feels like, now, and I do not like it. Not one bit. I attempted to clumsily utilize a design (rabbit) meant to be inserted vaginally as a external-only labia massager, because they told me to. With the band. IT DIDN’T GO WELL. AT ALL. In fact, I’m never going to use that yellow band again. NEVER NEVER NEVER. I would really love to talk to the person who thought it was a good idea. I have a drawer in my sex toy dresser that has a picture of Grumpy Cat pasted on the front. The yellow band is going in the Grumpy Cat drawer. I experienced the most discomfort using it in the crossed position. I didn’t think this shit up on my own, the box told me to try it. Rather, the best position for the band is off, and sitting far away.

The Fun Factory Amorino suggests these two positions for the band.....an open circle around the tip and clitoral arm, or crossing the band in the middle. Fun Factory Amorino - This position of the silicone band (open circle) was the least painful on pubic hair, and made more sense..... Fun Factory Amorino - This position of the silicone band (crossed in the middle) was awful, and yanked out a few pubic hairs Fun Factory Amorino - The best position for the silicone band....off, and sitting far away

Amorino marks my 5th Fun Factory vibrator, I think. I’ve had the Ellove, the now-defunct Babeland-only Boss Lady, the G4 Patchy Paul and G4 Big Boss. Since all are marketed as internal vibrators, I wasn’t blown away. I personally need a very strong and rumbly vibrator for my g-spot to even show up for the party. Not even with the G4’s could deliver. There was just too much pliable silicone for those rumbly vibrations to get through to still remain powerful. But I wouldn’t call them weak, either. Just….not what I expected/was hoping for. And while I hadn’t really expected to be blown away by the Fun Factory Amorino since it is a “mini” vibe, this line from their site had me wondering: “new, powerful, long-lasting motor”.  Amorino certainly *sounds* powerful, but the bark is worse than the bite. In use, the vibrations are terribly surface-buzzy and I just don’t have time for that. If the vibrations in the Amorino had been satisfactory, I would be able to recommend this to be used sans yellow band. None of the other mini vibes that are recently launched have a clitoral arm that looks to be in a decent enough position. 

This is a dual stimulator that doesn’t have a ton of bells and whistles; you can’t separately control the internal and external portions and nothing rotates/churns/strokes. Some people don’t want the bells and whistles, they just want the luxury of being able to kill two birds with one stone so for those, this type of “rabbit” vibe might be sufficient. The silicone is decent (it’s not the worst offender in attracting dust and fur, but it’s no Lelo, either), there are no animal faces, and the lack of bells and whistles means that it is pretty easy to operate. Fun Factory Amorino is waterproof, as most Fun Factory vibes are. You can turn it off in a flash, the buttons lock for travel, and it comes in this garish, neon pink but also a color they call “petrol”, oddly, which just seems to be a shade of teal that I quite like. The charging is probably the best version of magnetic charging that I’ve come across. It looks like the metal dots are barely touching, but no matter what position I laid the vibe in for charging, the magnets kept their connection and it kept on charging. This is the first Fun Factory item I’ve had with this new Click n Charge, and I have to say I like it. A lot.

Fun Factory Amorino - Showing the magnetic Click and Charge feature. The contacts appear to be barely touching, but no matter how you lay the vibrator, it stays connected and charging.

The vibrations are meant for those who don’t like/don’t need deeply-felt rumbling sensations….or who don’t really need much vibration, period. I need them, and I need them to be strong and deep, but I do recognize that not everyone does. However….I really really dislike the vibrations on this thing and find a hard time imagining it being good enough for most. There doesn’t seem to be a motor in the clitoral arm, nor does the motor in the shaft go much past the midway point, so that also tells you that this isn’t for vibration enthusiasts. The silicone has a decent amount of give to it – it’s nothing like jelly, but it’s softer than the Jopen Vanity/Picobong/Lelo dual stimulators. Operation begins by pressing and holding the “Fun” button for a pause, and then there’s only a plus a minus. Easy operation, sure, but it’s also easy to flip past the highest power level and get into the patterns. Annoying.

Basically…..the band is a gimmick, as many of us reviewers likely assumed. I do not feel it adds anything positive to the vibrator. It doesn’t achieve anything special. It’s something that will, instead, irritate you or get eaten by your dog/cat and later freak you out.  If you have a really thick head of hair, maybe it could be a hair tie1.



(and thanks to Shevibe.com for supplying the Fun Factory Amorino and wanting my typical Lilly impression on this)

  1. I attempted for a moment to be “witty” and think up a few other hysterical “uses” for it, but I’m bored already with this thing