Dec 042009

Moving on. It’s not an easy thing to do. And encountering douchetards of the “I am Dom, bow before me, bitch” variety makes it more difficult.

Mz. Impy reminded me a few days ago why I left CollarMe. The other kink social site I belong to isn’t anywhere near as bad but there are the occasional dickheads there. I have a profile on these two forums – posting sexy things, pics, etc and on the one the messages are usually more respectful and complimenting and such.


I had only mentioned my BDSM past here and there in little bites in various threads, but it was always always “that’s my past and I’m not interested in going there anymore, I’m not looking for a Dom”. But they don’t listen, do they.

I think I held back quite a bit here, don’t you?

Subject: The First Thing…

Message: that I would insist on is that you wear a butt plug to loosen your as up for my thick cock. As your Master you would be expected to make yourself available when and where I said. You can expect to spend much time on your knees attending to my knees.

If your understand my rules you will receive the benefit of my training,


P.S. Just add in the subject line that you are a ‘Willing Sub”

My reply: I think the plug would do better up your ass, because then it might make you take your head out from your ass. Nowhere do I state that I would be receptive to this sort of disrespectful unsolicited email. Learn some goddamn manners.

He did indeed have the audacity to write back:

Suck my cock and don’t dribble, that would be your demostration of manners you cock sucker.

I did not change a thing about his messages.

Let me repeat that for you in case you didn’t catch my drift the first time:

I did not change a thing about his messages.


I mean, you know, should YOU think he’s all 67 kinds of sexy and that you’d be a good willing sub for him? Why, I encourage you to contact him. I just want you two lovebirds to be happy, I really an truly do! I just hope you are well-versed in attending to knees. I bet he was just having a rough day and was in need of some snuggle-wuggle time with his Willing Sub.

I didn’t have the heart to tell him that the only willing sub I can give him is meatballs with provolone on a soggy hoagie bun.

Oct 032009

Ya know, I don’t do it often, but tonight I’m just gonna let the crankiness flow. Mmkay? Glad you’re with me.

So I don’t know why the fuck I still have a profile on OkCupid*. I don’t go there much anymore. It’s been awhile since I’ve met anyone from there. The last guy that I met I thought it was just a friendly date despite him being enamored with the “Blog Lilly”. We emailed quite a bit and I found him great to talk to. I had thought that I made it clear that despite the fact that he’s seen blog photos of me naked and that I can be mildly flirty, this was a friendly coffee date only. Now either I didn’t make it quite clear enough or he was severely let down meeting the “real life me” in contrast to “Blog Lilly”.  I’ll never know. All I got from him the next day was that I “confused him”. He didn’t know what to make of things, of our meeting. He couldn’t tell me why he was confused or what about. Whatever. I said hello via email a few weeks later and still no reply back. I’m sure he no longer reads the blog. Just before him was Shawn, but she disappeared too eventually after we hung out once. She faded in and out for the next month after and we spoke of getting together again but it never happened.

In recent months, though, Okcupid has been a sesspool of idiots. Stupid emails, crass emails. You guys know, you’ve read a few. Finally I added this to the beginning of my profile: “I apparently need to spell this out, and also put it at the top. I do not have the “casual sex” box checked off, for a reason. It’s because I don’t want a casual fuck with a stranger. So if you feel so inclined to drop me a line touting your mad skillz in bed or just that you’d like to fuck me and would I like to meet to make that happen? Save your time, and don’t drop me such a line. It won’t get you anywhere. If you’re looking for a quickie NSA hookup, I direct you to your local Craigslist.” The “hey wanna fuck” emails dwindled down considerably. Still the straggling asshats and morons attempted now and then. Today’s email was the pinnacle.

Subj: no offense but…
guys message you for an nsa hook up because your tits are like small countries with vast tracks of land and you’ve put those pictures on your profile. i’m not excusing them, random sexual encounters are dangerous. but as a guy, i thought you should understand.
and that was my way of starting a conversation. its like a coin toss. we’ll see what happens when the penny drops.

I replied: “So you’re telling me that the price I pay for having big tits is getting unwanted NSA hook-up emails? Or is it just that I have big tits and I’m not ashamed and covering them up like a librarian? Is this like the argument that a rape victim deserved it if she dressed up sexy because she felt like it?”

My pics are not overtly whorishly sexual, they’re sexy and guess what? There’s cleavage. You can’t hide that at 42DDD. So I’m asking for it by having those, as opposed to fun frolicky “look at me having fun with random peers, i must be normal!” pics.

Y’all tell me if I’m being a cunty bitch here, ok? It’s alright, I can take it. Over there in the sidebar, up at the top, I have my copyright listed. It’s also in the footer of every single post, to be seen when you’re viewing a singular post. Basically, you’re free to share/re-post portions of my posts or my pics so long as you have my permission OR you appropriately credit me (i.e. this blog, via link). There’s more than just that but you can read it here. Now, last HNT was only posted on my blog. I didn’t upload it to Twitpic or similar. I tweeted a link, but this person wasn’t a follower at the time (I lock down my tweets). He tweeted about my pic, crediting my twitter account name and linked people to the photo – not my direct link of it, not my blog post link but to an imageshack link where this person uploaded it to his own account. When you view it, there’s zero accrediting to me/this blog. I told him that he couldn’t do that, and to remove it. He argued: “No copyright infringement, Fair Use, U asked ppl on social media to look @ it, I did, & reviewed it on my non-commercial social media page. I also credit you and send pple to UR site. Once there U can try to sell DVDs, videos, blogs, cam-time whatever. However if U do not want my compliments or the extra exsposure, just say so, & I’ll Unfollow – I play nice.”  W. T. F. I have no damn clue what he’s prattling on about with selling shit, I don’t do that. He never credited my site. People are viewing that photo and as has happened before with my pics, someone with a tumblr will repost it and be in violation of my creative commons because they didn’t credit me. I’m now the dramatic cunt because I calmly and nicely told him hey, thanks but can you please credit or remove? your current method is “not allowed”.

I don’t care what I post, what I say, what pictures I put up. There’s only one person who’s ever allowed to use the terms “nasty” and “filthy” in regards to me and that’s R and that’s only in sexual roleplay (which is in the past). It’s not sexy, it doesn’t turn me on. It makes you look like a disrespectful pig. From a stranger, those words are not a compliment or a way to hit on me.

Ok so I just now saw that I had a response to the above mentioned Okcupid mail about my vast tracks of land and perhaps I jumped a little harshly at the poor guy. But still. vast tracks of land?!?!

him: “you’re right. guys should show you respect regardless of what you’re wearing. i only meant to give you a window into the mind of the average male; not offer an excuse for their actions. i’ll remember this. for future reference, i’ll never message someone new and start talking about her vast tracks of land. at the time, it just seemed like a better way to say hello than “hey! i’m bi-polar too! hooray!“”

Oh and while I’m at it I just gotta share with you one last Okcupid email. Got this from a guy who claims to be 39 in his profile but looks much more like 59.

Subj: Head – how bout it?
Body:  How bout some head ?

When I didn’t reply to that lovely gem, he sends another email the next day.

Subj: re: “head” request.
Body: requesting some “head”.

To which I took in a snarly fiery nostril deep breath and fired off: “I’m requesting that you fuck off and die. This isn’t the Bunny Ranch, or craigslist, and I made it clear I’m not looking for casual sex. You’re a disgusting old pervert.” And then I blocked his ass from ever contacting me again.

I swear you guys, I’ve got sexy shit here in drafts. I promise. But for some reason, even though I’m on that “health watch” 2.5 weeks off work and can type to my lil hearts content………it ain’t comin. All that’s flowing these last two days is cranky and snarky and growly. So um, real soon. Promise.

*I don’t now. After proofing this post I thought about it and weighed the pros and cons and dumped the profile. There’s still huge shoes to fill and it’s just not gonna happen anytime soon.

Apr 162009

You find the funniest things when you’re doing fun google image searches. I won’t tell you how I got to this blog posting.

No, I won’t. Stop asking.

When I read posts like this it makes me thankful for the men (most of them) currently in my life and that they would never be this…….ignorant. Stupid. Chauvinistic. And just….downright….icky! Yes I’m so….ARGH that I’m at a loss for descriptive words.

Gee, I’m a slut.

I didn’t know that…..did you?!?!?!

  • She broaches the subject of sex first.

The more explicitly she talks about sex before you’ve banged her, the likelier she has a storied slutty past.

  • She suggests kinky sex acts.

If you’ve been dating a short while and she eagerly implores you for public sex before the glow of bedroom missionary sex has worn off, you’ve got a slut.

  • She shows a lot of cleavage all the time.

No worries if she’s accentuating her tits on the first date to entice you, but if she’s got those colliding death stars displayed for the world to admire every time you’re out with her, you’ve got a woman on your hands who is addicted to advertising herself. And there will be buyers, oh yes!

Wow. Yeah. Slutttttttty! Ding ding ding! Sign me up baby!

Here’s where it starts to piss me off:

  • She’s neurotic and disagreeable.

Emotionally flighty girls are vaginally flighty girls. They are ruled by their vaginas. If she’s the gossipy, backstabbing, conniving sort who drips with sarcasm and generally disdains everyone around her, you can bet her black soul will seek sustenance on a carousel of cock.

No, fucktard, maybe she just needs a fucking ORGASM that you obviously aren’t very capable of giving her. Or, wait, would her ability to orgasm also be deemed a clue to her slutdom?

  • She seems “hard”.

If she’s got that tough, tankgrrl aura about her, like she’s been through dating hell and back, and her cynicism is worse than yours, you know she’s been used like a cheap whore.

  • She tells you about all the places she’s traveled.

Yeah, chicks love to travel, but how many have put their dreams into action? If your date has been around the world twice with multiple stops in Rome, Rio, Vegas, LA, or some Appalachian backwater you can be sure she’s “traveled” straight into the crotch of an exotic local at every destination.

Traveling?? SERIOUSLY?!?!?!

  • She’s black.

Sorry, folks, hate to say it, but going by my personal experience and what I’ve heard from friends, black chicks seem to sleep around more. Don’t blame me, I’m just the Deliverer Of Truths Best Left Unsaid But I’m Going To Say Anyhow.

So now he’s not only a chauvinistic sexist prick, he’s racist too.

  • Her cunt is cavernous.

Some of you wonder if this is an urban legend or a frat boy joke, but it’s got a kernel of truth. If you feel big with most girls, but small with her (and she doesn’t have the excuse of being a seacow), she has a stretched out pussy that has happily accommodated a parade of giant cocks. Why do you think Kegels are all the rage with the city slutterati? Chicks are onto the fact that their distended pussies betray their loose ways, and anything to tighten up that love hole helps them hide their pecker pounded tracks. When I feel humongous with a girl, I know she has a normal sized snatch that hasn’t been used like the town orifice. The more I feel like I’m ripping her insides to shreds, the likelier I am to move her to the front of my cherished girlfriend queue.


Wow. I’m sure I’m as flabbergasted by this “stretched out pussy” bullshit as AAG was.

What’s worse is the comments on this post. Sure there’s some that are calling this guy every bad name in the book but honestly there’s way too many in agreement for my taste.

If one would take this list seriously, it’s safe to say that 90% of women in the dating age range are to be considered a slut by this author and his flock of idiot sheep.

Edit: This is not the only post on his site, in case you didn’t look at it or browse around. This isn’t a troll post, he is really and truly like this, it’s the “theme” of his blog.