Dec 102014
 

It’s no secret that I’m not a fan of Pipedream. They’re one of the “Big 5” companies, having been around for many years. They like to think they’re a Mafia Boss the way they treat smaller companies in the industry. They take their ability to make mass amounts of sex toys every day and create so much crap. They’re no stranger to misogynistic ad copy on their sex toys but their latest little stunt is above and beyond.

I’m sure any of you reading this are aware of the big celeb phone hacking dubbed “The Fappening”, where dozens of stars had their cell phones hacked and the photos shared for the world to see. Some of these were naked selfies. It was a violation of their privacy, it was a violation of consent. Jennifer Lawrence rightly called it a sex crime.

“Just because I’m a public figure, just because I’m an actress, does not mean that I asked for this,” she told Vanity Fair. “It does not mean that it comes with the territory. It’s my body, and it should be my choice, and the fact that it is not my choice is absolutely disgusting. I can’t believe that we even live in that kind of world.” (Vanity Fair)

“It is not a scandal. It is a sex crime. It is a sexual violation. It’s disgusting. The law needs to be changed, and we need to change. That’s why these Web sites are responsible. Just the fact that somebody can be sexually exploited and violated, and the first thought that crosses somebody’s mind is to make a profit from it. It’s so beyond me. I just can’t imagine being that detached from humanity. I can’t imagine being that thoughtless and careless and so empty inside.” (Vanity Fair)

Knowing all of this do you think there’s any chance Jennifer Lawrence would have consented to have her likeness made into a SEX DOLL? I don’t fucking think so. In true gross fashion, Pipedream had to take it up a notch. It’s not just a Jennifer Lawrence doll. It’s a JLaw “Hacked” doll…..complete with a JLaw-lookalike model dressed as Katniss Everdeen plus posing in selfies made to look just like the ones leaked. Since they’re using a model and not the actual leaked photos, Pipedream isn’t doing anything illegal. But it’s disgusting. It makes light of anyone whose consent has been violated with naked photos leaked to the public. What’s next, Pipedream? Are you going to start making dolls from photos found on Revenge Porn sites?  Here’s the wonderful ad copy and then a quote from their press release:

We’re not sure what came faster, news of J-Laws leaked selfies or the thousands of guys waiting for this day to finally come! She did the world a favor when her sexy selfies spread across the internet, and now Hollywood’s honey is getting naked for the money! If hacked cell phone pics weren’t enough to make J-Law our favorite new selfie slut, her brand new blowup doll is proof that this blockbuster babe is ready for primetime penetration! Just add air and this American hustler transforms into America’s hooker right before your eyes! There’s no silver lining to her 3 love holes, but if you add a little lube they feel great wrapping around every inch of your pleasure rod! Her cloud got hacked so you can get jacked!

“Nobody creates products with mainstream crossover appeal like Pipedream,” Pipedream CEO Nick Orlandino said. “The publicity we receive when one of these celebrity dolls hits the market is priceless. Our customers will definitely experience rising sales as J-Law blows up — literally!“  (Xbiz)

Of course, the JLaw Hacked doll isn’t their first trip down the rabbit hole called Bad Taste. Their “Fuck Me Silly” toys are extremely offensive.  They, of course, justify their ad copy choice when called on it. Just when I think they’re maybe, possibly okay-ish to support for their silicone toys (because people do need access to affordable sex toys and if it’s a crap brand’s silicone butt plug vs buying a porous one, well I’ll choose the lesser of two evils), I find that they include AnalEaze  with all of their silicone butt toys. Their Fetish Fantasy line of low-priced silicone vibrators and cocks are not made of medical-grade silicone like they advertise (medical grade requires clean-room facilities which I cannot fathom them having) but that’s fine – we don’t need medical grade. It would be nice, though, for them to disclose that it’s not pure silicone through-and-through. The core is foam.  I’ve not dissected their Fetish Fantasy line and I can’t yet tell what the chances are of something happening to the silicone exterior enough that moisture could get to the foam core.

What I find the most ironic of all is this email I received earlier this year from their social media manager:

We keep a close eye on all the review blogs and it’s no secret that you’re not a fan of us. We know how influential you are to the blogging community and to customers. Since we so highly value your opinion, we wanted to reach out to you and offer you a trip to Pipedream. We’re hoping to talk to and show you what our company is all about, as well as learn from you and hear your personal feedback. If your opinion doesn’t change after meeting us – no hard feelings! We’d just like the opportunity to open up a dialogue with reviewers, show you what we do and who we are, and have a sit down conversation to more clearly hear your concerns. And, of course, your trip is completely on us. 

 I never responded because really….what could they say that would change my mind? ETA: Actually, since a few people who know nothing about me personally are ripping on me for not taking PD up on the offer, I now feel the need to expand on this. I never responded to the email because there was nothing they could say that would change my mind AND VICE VERSA. But I didn’t GO because, paid trip or not, the ability to take time off and fly there was not in the cards for me. I had multiple, valid personal reasons for being unable to make such a trip. I’m not young, single and without obligations enough to just pick up and go to California.  

Here’s my personal feedback, Pipedream: CLEAN UP YOUR FUCKING ACT. Stop being the douchey bros of the sex toy world. You don’t need to disrespect women to sell sex toys.  Why is “She Never Says No” such a common theme in your ad copy?

Many people have given me shit for being so vocal about not supporting this company. I’m supposed to just give a free pass to any company producing affordable silicone sex toys. And what about their affordable glass toy line? Their ceramic toy line? I’m sure there are other companies making cheap glass toys. If you want to support a company with rape culture ideals that’s your choice. It’s my choice to recommend brands other than Pipedream, and to educate my readers on why. 

 Posted by at 10:06 am
  • Rayne Millaray

    I’m with you. It’s a shame because I love most of their Icicles line (except the shitty flogger), but if they’re cutting corners everywhere else, you gotta wonder about even those, I guess. And Jesus fuck, really with this shit with the leaked photos? Yes, please! Make fun of sex crimes to sell sex toys. Fucking douchebags.

  • I just offered to refund them back the balance of what they paid for a banner ad and removed it. I was trying to overlook the distasteful and crappy stuff because of the need for affordable stuff, like the ceramic, aluminum and glass but with this… I just can’t ignore it anymore.

  • Good, hopefully this and any posts/letters they receive will open their eyes. I can’t say though that there’s any amount of money that Pipedream could pay me for me to ever have had them as a site sponsor. My disgust for them has been loud and long.

  • I learned a while back to not automatically write off products because they come from a “big 5” company because, like you said, sometimes it’s nice to have the less expensive accessible body safe option if it’s there. However, Pipedream I just write off. They seem to be on a mission to see how offensive and horrible they can be. The one moment I was tempted to let my guard down with them was at ANME when they brought out the Ceramix line. I love my ceramic dildo from a now-defunct company and said something like “oh! I love ceramic toys!” Then some dude-bro they had working the floor for them chuckled at me and said something like “Well, how could you know that? These are brand new!” I explained about my other toy and he proceeded to mansplain to me how they had just created the idea of ceramic toys (and thus I was obviously lying, bitches being crazy and all).

  • Oh FUCK THEM. Without lube.

  • Yeah. When they approached me about advertising I was still pretty new to reviewing and didn’t know much about the sleazy products. They paid for a year and since then I’ve learned more about them and then this JLaw thing was the catalyst for me to remove their banner. I still have some reviews of their products. I’m wondering what to do about those.

  • I’ve dispised Pipe Dreams from the day the paint flaked off my glass dildo (after less than 10 uses). I simply cannot believe this “marketing stunt”. I genuinely hope they get sewed, I am truly disgusted.

  • Shellie Martin

    Crystal Delights collaborated with another ceramics company and had a line of toys LONG before the PipeDreams collection. Just another example of how they think if they have not done it, it hasn’t yet been done! Nonsense!

  • preach

  • This is absolutely disgusting.

  • This is just disgusting and creepy. I checked out your Twitter feed Lilly and saw the Xbiz comment too. I could almost sense them rubbing their hands together and cackling in glee over the publicity this “stunt” will provide. Not a single fuck given for the young woman who was humiliated and violated. It’s not often I get riled up, but this does it! Thanks for sharing this information.

  • Nici

    A month or two ago a bunch of us tumblr folks mass-emailed Spencer’s to try to make them stop carrying a pipedream product labelled “tr*nny love doll.” Talk about gross. Also the fact that putting a foam core in a dildo is supposed to save manufacturing costs makes me wonder just how nasty that foam has to be in order to save money.

    I know that if you happen to be a victim of some dudebro photoshopping your face onto someone else’s nude body and then spreading it around, you can attempt to sue by claiming slander. I wonder if Lawrence would be able to do something similar or if pipedream would claim some sort of license under the right to parody.

  • As far as I know, this falls under parody since they are using someone who merely looks like her. They’re using her name. They’ve gotten away with this for a long time in this industry.

  • “We’re hoping to talk to and show you what our company is all about”, ” show you what we do and who we are” Nah. Don’t need to. You’ve showed us quite enough of what your company is all about, and what you do.

    Even if Lilly said yes to the trip, I’d be scared for her safety. With the kind of mindset you people have behind this JLaw Hacked doll, I have no idea what kind of moral or ethics guide you through your life.

    There are so many things I want to say to them, but I doubt they’d even listen. And it’s VERY sad that people purchasing from them, or people in the society aren’t even doing anything to change or stop them. I guess all we can do is complain…And what’s even sadder is that they are part of the big 5…

  • Mary Q. Contrary

    Pipedream has long been in bed with others in the business – specifically mainstream porn. These are the same circles where producers get together and think up what they would do to the girls that turned them down in high school and aim to make it as violent as possible to the actresses and their characters, so other dudebros watching can get off on treating women like shit. It’s the same community getting rich off the patriarchy – quite literally. While what they’ve done is abhorrent and people should know about it, they want the attention. This is Troll Moves 101. They really don’t care what we or the average consumer thinks – they see wholesalers and distribution channels as customers instead, by their verbiage. Ugh.

  • Charis B

    oh wow, such assholes

  • OOXX

  • MissX

    We stocked a few of them in the past, from the Icicle line. Very affordable and nice packaging. However, It always bothered me all the other creepy stuff they sell… a little while ago we decided to stop stocking them all together. I can also tell you that the best whoseller in AU was stocking them recently, but after very bad feedback from the retailers they stopped. This must be a sign that blogger are not alone of this. But we do need more retailers to take this step too, as well as constantly educate customers about great companies to buy from.

  • MissX

    They created the idea of ceramic toys! WOW! Just in Australia I can tell you that Goldfrau has been around since 2006/2007. They were batch made by an industrial designer who did her PHD thesis in sex toys. So please Pipedream, JUST STOP!

  • I actually applaud you for taking this stance. I like their icicles brand, think it is the only thing I like (liked) about pipedreams. I have now taking the choice to not purchase any products from this company again. I can’t say that to companies who send me products to review BUT what I can do is ring a voice of reason, like this post has done. But since the J-law doll charade, I am no longer a pipedream customer (glass). As for you not taking PD up on their offer, that is up to you to do and no one should shame you for your choice. They could show you a 1000 factories and still turn out dodgy sex toys. Taking that time out too (paid or not), when you have a job, isn’t easy either. I would prefer to use that holiday time for a trip that I am invested in, not one where a company will try to ‘buy me’. So sod those that have given you backlash, it’s your choice, not theirs. As for taking advantage of someone’s privacy being raided, I hope karma kick’s PD’s arse and back again

  • Dane

    Aw dang I didn’t know this and just recommended their icicles to someone on Epiphora’s site. Woops, won’t be doing that again. It’s a real shame they have to be so shitty

  • Wow! There’s a lot of shitty things going on here. I guess I gave them a pass because it seemed like maybe they were slowly catching up and I -do- like the Ceramix line.. mostly.. but that doll is so disrespectful. and the foam core? WTF. It makes me want to cut open the dildo I recently swapped away. I feel bad to the person who got it. But I would never think to cut open a “silicone” dildo because WTF. So many layers of awful. Now I feel lucky that only one of my toys from them broke..

  • I’m disgusted. This is the last straw. I’ve never really supported them but didn’t write off their affordable Icicles line because it seemed decent, but after this…no. No way in hell. Thanks for writing this Lilly.

  • Camryn Jones

    The blatant racism in their marketing has always bothered me, so I’m thrilled to see people announcing them for the trash they are. I have some Icicles and Ceramix toys on my wishlist, but I’d rather buy them secondhand than give Pipedream my money. They don’t seem to get that Black women (and other women of color) are actual people, not flavored versions of pussy.

    Such a vile company deserves to be boycotted. Unfortunately I have no trouble believing they’d be so callous as to try to profit from sex crimes; their marketing makes it obvious that they’re not promoting healthy, consensual sex *glares*

  • Tmcaurinus

    Yeah, the laws they need a-changin’.