Sep 102009
 

How long does it take to move on?

How long until you stop comparing potential “replacements” to what is being replaced?

How long until you can reclaim that thing, or that subject, or that place as yours – the way it was before they claimed it with you….

Before you let them in to it, whether in open arms or edging along the wall…..


How long until you stop seeing the replacement as a poor substitute?

Finding faults and cons, not pros.


There’s this pair of shoes sitting here, left behind. Big shoes to fill, so to speak. They’re not perfect shoes; there’s a few scuffs and a squeak that comes from the left heel when walking. These shoes are unique and one of a kind. I don’t think they can be filled by anyone but their old owner. They can’t even be borrowed for a little bit. And since I am seeing that similar=poor substitute, it’s time for a new style.

How long until I’m able to move them? Not to be gotten rid of entirely, but put away so that it doesn’t look like they’re sitting and waiting (I’m not sitting and waiting). The shoes are going to stay where they are for the time being, I guess. A little longer, a slow and gradual move. But I’m not ready.

Not yet.





  • http://longingsend.wordpress.com mina

    Hate to break it to you… but you never stop. Even when you find the person that is SO much better, you then start comparing what does make them so much better! *hugs*

  • http://dangerousliaisons-aurore.blogspot.com/ Aurore

    This post resonates with me. In time it will get easier. Take care.

  • http://www.sexyptamom.blogspot.com Grace

    It is okay not to be ready. And even when you have made that move for good, you will still remember. That is okay too. I know the melancholy will fade, though. But perhaps you can enjoy a good wallow in it in the meantime. Sometimes you just need it! Or at least I do.

  • TUG

    Those are some damn good questions. Let me know when you get the answers.

  • blueyeguy

    When you are ready to trash those shoes, you will know.

    Until then, remember the places they took you and the experiences you had.

    You will be ok, Lil. Just takes a little time. And don’t ever settle for something less than the best for you -

  • http://tiwiwtw.wordpress.com rage

    Oh dear. At first I thought you were talking about a relationship. Then, shoes. Then, after reading the comments I finally figured out it was because of a relationship.

    Don’t ever settle for less. Everyone has their shoes to fill – some are better than others at filling those shoes.

    ((hugs))

  • nancy

    Ahh.. It takes however long it takes. Sadly there isn’t any better way to say it.
    And you will never forget. Nobody will ever measure up..but eventually SOMEONE will be better.
    You still won’t forget.. but the new one will be the new bar..the new standard ~~
    {{hugs}}

  • Miss D

    I think it’s important to put the shoes away; don’t forget them or the happy times you had in them or be sad that you once loved them so much but put them away anyway.

    My shoes are still in the corner and despite having an awesome new pair I’d still put my old shoes on in a flash, but they don’t seem to want to go on my feet anymore. In someways I don’t think I’ll ever wear those type of shoes again, they were one of a kind.

    But I’m still happy about them and remember the first (and last) time I slipped them on) *sigh* My life is richer for wearing them.