Nov 252015

Black Friday in retail land usually means deals on odd brands that no one would normally buy, making you think you’re getting a sweet deal. But in reality, it’s gonna break on you 2 weeks after the warranty is up. Black Friday in the world of sex toy retail though is the time to spend your dough on the items you’ve wished and sighed for. This is perhaps the best chance you’ll get at finding deals on pricey sex toys, if you know where to shop. SheVibe won’t have “door busters” on crappy, porous sex toys, they’ll just put everything on sale and let you pick. Need some help? I have IDEAS.



Shevibe is doing a progressive sale. You don’t have to spend a lot, really, to get their best deal of 20% off. Since SheVibe’s prices are already as low as many manufacturers will let authorized retailers go, you’re getting a pretty sweet ride. You can buy from SheVibe knowing that your package will arrive safely, discreetly and that they won’t ever send you anything else you didn’t order (no porn catalogs in the mail, here!). You can be assured that your order will be backed up by fabulous customer service, too.  BONUS FOR MY READERS: In addition to the fabulous discounts, you can also enter another coupon code and get a $10 gift card good towards your next purchase if you spend $100 or more, or a $5 giftcard if you spend $99 or less (1 card per order). Use code LILLYBB5 if you spend less than $99, or LILLYBB10 if you spend more than $100. And yes, you can get BOTH the giftcard AND the sale pricing, you can use two coupon codes.

So, what should you get? This sale would be the perfect time to splurge on things that are a little over-priced (ahem, Lelo – this sale might take the items back to what they used to be priced at), making the hit to your wallet a little easier. Consider the L’amourose Rosa or Denia because I’ve loved these two vibes a lot. Would 20% off the awfully-named Womanizer that has me so confused make things a little easier? And of course, you can’t forget the Doxy Die Cast and the Doxy Skittle. Not a Doxy person? I don’t love it as much, but this would be a great time to consider the Magic Wand Rechargeable. I’ve heard a lot of good things about the pricey Lelo Hugo, so that might be on your list. And of course the Hot Octopuss Pulse can’t be missed for those penis-havers in your life. If you’re a Tom of Finland fan, this sale plus SheVibe’s pricing makes the Kake Collector’s Cock almost tolerable in pricing.  And it almost goes without saying, if you don’t own it yet, add the Tango in to your order. If you want a gift pack for someone new to sex toys, I recommend the We-Vibe Tango Kit which has a Tango, the insertable (Glow) vaginal sleeve and the baby plug (Dusk).

Sometimes I have to just recommend entire brands, because they’re that good. This is the time of year to consider purchasing a beautiful wood creation from Nobessence, or some artistic glass from Fucking Sculptures. For harnesses and more, my absolute most favorite brand is Aslan Leather because their leather is sooo soft and comfortable. While you might win one from me,  anything by Njoy is a must-have in your collection.

Need a couple small things to round up your order? Don’t forget the lube — Sliquid and Good Clean Love are the best — and consider an anti-bacterial toy storage pouch such as the Sugar Sak.


So we still have the Grab Bag sale, buy two get one free (good through the end of the month, while supplies last). BUT Friday through Sunday, everything sitewide at Tantus that is a Tantus brand item (meaning things like Doxy Wands, lube, basically everything on this page is not included) is BUY ONE GET ONE FREE. YES.  This means you could grab the highly popular Uncut #1 for $114 and get anything else your heart desires for free (so long as it costs $114 or less, which is how these work, the Free item is equal or lesser value). Closeout items are included. If you’ve had your eye on multiple really large dildos, now is the time to buy them – like the Amsterdam, the Hoss, the Cisco, etc. These are all large and pricey, and this is the sale that’ll let you get them!

Ever wanted more than one Feeldoe? One for warm-up, perhaps and another for more fulfilling play? They’re included, too! Have you had your eye on one of the connoisseur harnesses? Yep, they’re included.

Crystal Delights

Their much-loved Mini Twist Plugs are $15 off for Black Friday.



I’ll be updating this post as I find out about more sales. I know there will be a 4-hour Flash Sale at Tantus on Monday; Smitten Kitten will have something going on for Cyber Monday. I’m sure Lovehoney will have deals, too.

 Posted by at 1:00 am
Nov 202015

7WandsWhy 7 Njoy Pure Wands? Because I’m a dork. Because that’s how much I love this sex tool.  It’s no toy; it’s a gorgeous hunk of body-safe polished 316 grade stainless steel that seems to be made of magic as far as my g-spot is concerned1. In my 7 years of reviewing I’ve never loved a dildo as much as I love my Pure Wand and I want many people to experience the (n)joy it brings.

I knew, well I’d hoped, that we would be buying a house this year. I just didn’t know when. So when the house buying and moving occurred in April I had no idea how much it would distance me from blogging and just in general being available on the ‘net. I’d had grand plans to attempt to locate various retailers willing to give me a total of 7 Njoy Pure Wands. It felt daunting because I am very selective in who I work with and I don’t work with 7 retailers. Between the dauntingness of the task and the exhaustion from moving, I didn’t do a giveaway during my blog anniversary.  When I was at Woodhull’s Sexual Freedom Summit I got to see Greg again, the genius behind the best dildo ever, and also met his partner Marla. When I said to Greg “Yeah I’d considered doing a “7 Wands for 7 Years” giveaway this summer but between the house buying and what seemed like an inability to procure 7, it never happened but it would have been cool” he says to me with confusion “Did you email us??”. I said no, with equal confusion, and he said “Well email me! I’ll send you 7!” and on your behalf, readers, I nearly fainted with giddy joy of being able to make 7 people verrrry happy.

And here we are!

OH BUT WAIT, there’s a special unscheduled guest. Marla sweetly tucked in an Njoy Eleven. Since I’ve already had the pleasure of experiencing the Eleven, one of you will get it. I AM SO EXCITED! BE EXCITED WITH ME! Yes, the Eleven comes in a black leather purse which is also awesome.

This is a World Wide contest with FREE SHIPPING!

The utter joy of viewing 7 Pure Wands and 1 Eleven in preparation to shuttle them off into the world to their new homes comes with another responsibility – the cost of shipping. The way I normally do my giveaways is that if the winner is in the US, the shipping is free for them but for those outside the US (or outside countries the giveaway sponsor won’t ship to) I take the item myself and the winner pays shipping. However, the Pure Wand weighs 2 pounds 12 ounces when packaged, while the Eleven weighs 4 pounds. This makes for damn pricey shipping, even just in the US. So after a fabulous idea by Sarah, I called upon other bloggers to help give you the gift of completely free shipping. These bloggers are all chipping in to pay for your shipping. All you have to do is follow them on Twitter if you don’t already. Yes, this is a lot of people to follow but I can promise you, you won’t regret it. We’re a pretty fun & interesting bunch of people. Some of us tweet more, some tweet less, many will have giveaways of their own that you’ll get insider scoops on! I chose these people because they have less than 2,000 followers and they need some extra exposure to the world; plus I think they’re all pretty rad, and their blogs are great. All bloggers who joined in write honest reviews with no bullshit – I wouldn’t recommend anything less. Please say hello and thank you to: Artemesia Femmecock; Apricot Creams; Bex Talks Sex; Blissfully Orgasmic; The Big Gay Review; Come Heather; Dizzygirl; Erocentric (Mandy); For Sploosh’s Sake (Lena); Miss Ruby Reviews; Mary Q Contrary; Ninja Sexology (Lunabelle); Perineum Plunders; Purple Elysium (Ely); Pimento Mori.

Tumblr Peeps Only – 3 Njoy Pure Wands

Tumblr has blossomed into a fabulous place for spreading sex education; it’s an amazing way to “preach beyond the choir” as Tumblr bloggers who might not normally reblog a thing about sex toys do it anyways because they want to keep their friends safe. I’ve selected some posts that I think are pretty important for education; to get an entry, simply reblog them. Where this gets a little more interesting is that you’ll get bonus entry points for every person who reblogs it directly from you. If someone reblogs from you and then someone reblogs from them, that third tier down won’t count for you, just the immediate reblog. Make sense? I’ll give out 50 bonus points total (1 for every reblog you get) for this. You may encourage your readers to share the post with their followers, but I ask that you NOT ask them to share because of a contest. They should share if they want to spread the info. They will share if you’ve added some insightful/helpful info/anecdote. But if I see that you’re all “HEY share this so I can win a dildo thx!” I won’t count your entry. If this seems overly complicated to you, contact me and I will try to explain it differently. I’ll either add in the points you receive for this manually to the widget OR just publish the tally when the contest is over, for transparency.

Three of the seven wands will go to Tumblr readers, winners chosen at random so the more entry points the better your chances.

7 Wands for 7 years – Tumblr Edition

Twitter Followers Only – 2 Njoy Pure Wands

This one is simple. Follow all of the lovely other bloggers who are paying for your shipping. As a reward for following all of the wonderful bloggers who are making sure your shipping is FREE, you can unlock the “refer friends” bonus entry, which I don’t think has a cap on the referrals! Referring friends is where you’ll probably get the most entries.

Two of the seven wands will go to Twitter followers, winners chosen at random so the more entry points the better your chances. 

7 wands for 7 years – Twitter Edition

Blog Readers Only – 2 Njoy Pure Wands

I know I have some fans who aren’t on Twitter or Tumblr. You guys get your special section. If you’ve already entered in the Tumblr or Twitter contest, you can’t enter here. You CAN but I’ll know you’re the same person and you’ll be banned all across the board, so don’t try to cheat. Yes, I will know. Please don’t disappoint me by trying.

You must comment on this post to win. Your comment must contain 3 things; leave any out and you’re not eligible. You’re going to comment on this post and tell me which review of mine is your favorite, and why; you’ll also tell me what item(s) you’d most like me to review next OR what guides/material safety questions I should answer via post. Finally, a (brief!) bit on why you want the Pure Wand.  I will keep an eye on the spam filter for comments that don’t show up. If your comment doesn’t get approved within 24 hours of posting it, please contact me.

BONUS ENTRY POINTS: If you already subscribe to my newsletter, please be sure that you’ve signed up for the giveaway under that email address. Those who are subscribers prior to the contest will receive 5 bonus entry points. Don’t try to lie. If you fill out this entry and you weren’t a subscriber PRIOR TO THE CONTEST then I’ll have to disqualify you. 

Two of the seven wands will go to blog readers.

7 Wands for 7 years – Blog Edition

Open to ALL – Njoy Eleven

First, I need you to understand that the Njoy Eleven is heavy (2.75 lbs by itself) and large. The smaller end is 1.75″ but it’s also the best end to hold it from, and the larger end is 2″. This thing feels like a bit MORE than a two-inch-wide silicone dildo just due to the solid steel and the weight. If you have problems with certain dildos catching your pubic bone, this may or may not be the best toy for you (but, neither would the Pure Wand).

This contest is open to everyone, again with the free shipping thanks to those lovely folks above (even if you aren’t entering to win a Pure Wand, give them a follow as a thanks for covering your shipping on the Eleven).  If you entered to win a Pure Wand you can also enter to win an Eleven.

Njoy Eleven


For specs on the items, see here for the Pure Wand and here for the Eleven.

Winners will have 48 hours to respond to my notification email when the contest ends. I want to ship these out ASAP so that you might get them in time for the holidays. For International shipments I will put a reasonable (but not the retail value) price value to help mitigate high customs/VAT.

This contest is proudly sponsored by THE AMAZING NJOY – Thank you Greg and Marla for sending me these!!!!

  1. While not everyone adores the Pure Wand I think its success rate has to be better than 85%
 Posted by at 12:04 pm
Nov 182015

I have a few other reviews that I need to knock out before I can get my review up for the Womanizer; plus I really felt that you have to see the look of utter mystification on my face when I’m talking about the Womanizer. I’ve officially named mine Blanche. I don’t normally name my vibrators, but this vibrator is Blanche Devereaux through and through.  I’m sorry for the lack of captioning; I’m going to work on that. I will take recommendations from those who do videos on how best to caption on screen and have it NOT take 4 hours? Also, yes I know. The quality is lacking. This is my first and I wanted to just jump in without editing and without making a big production of it all. If I think that this is something I plan to do again then I will record the video with my better equipment.

While each vibrator has its pros and cons, all three are going to get my stamp of approval. When the full blog post reviews come out you can expect in-depth photos of the Womanizer (the seams, oh god, the seams) and videos of the Doxy Die Cast and Doxy Skittle, especially as they compare to other wands and similar items.

And as I mention at the end of the video….something big is happening Friday! Come back for that!!

Oct 212015


The We-Vibe Tango is my all-time favorite vibrator because it delivers on rumbles and power like no other pinpoint clitoral vibrator can. It’s versatile, too. But the biggest complaint is that there is no travel-lock setting on it, which makes air travel with the We-Vibe Tango next to impossible. People fear that it will just turn on in their luggage, prompting chaos as it is mistaken for a bomb. When you have only a single, exposed push button that doesn’t require you to press and hold for a few seconds, accidental turn-ons can happen. That said…I’ve traveled with the Tango in my luggage/purse a bunch of times1, and have never had anything accidentally press the button hard enough to turn it on.

But I still wanted to find a protective case in part because people ask me about traveling with it a lot (actually, they often ask: what else can I bring that has a travel lock that is as good as the Tango and the answer is always NOTHING). And I finally found something that is 99% perfect. I scoured Amazon2 for a case that fit what I needed: 3.5″ long inside, not round, hardshell, affordable (preferably Prime shipping, too). After a few returns, I found one that comes as close to perfect as we’ll get until Standard Innovations takes my idea and runs with it3.

The Brainwavz case may not be your favorite colors, I know, but it doesn’t seem to come in any color other than a black case with a red zipper and red pockets inside. The reasons why it’s nearly perfect: It’s rectangular on the 3.5″ side, which means the Tango isn’t going to move around any. It’s snug in there on the diagonal and this means that the button is protected. It’s a hard shell case, so it can’t get crunched in your bag and have the button inside pressed. The pouches inside perfectly keep the Tango and charger in place (it can fit the cable and charging piece just fine, or you can put the cable elsewhere and just have the charging connector in the case). The zippers are good quality and the overall pouch can flex slightly….which leads me to the reason I said it’s 99% perfect. It’s a fraction smaller than 3.5″ on the diagonal inside the case, which means the Tango is very snugly in there and slightly deforms the case a bit on the corners4. It’s not enough that it affects the ability for the case to be zipped, it doesn’t strain the zipper and in time it’ll probably conform to your Tango better without the case looking slightly wonky.

Brainwavz1 Brainwavz2 Brainwavz3

As you can see in the close-up picture, the button of the Tango essentially has a protective dome over it because of the way it’s in the case. I’ve tried everything I could think of, nothing I did to the case turned the Tango on. Like hearing angels sing I knew I finally found a safe way to travel with the We-Vibe Tango, worry-free.

Since it’s apparently not an obscure brand of earphones, Brainwavz Audio, I found the exact same case at Amazon Canada and Amazon UK. It’s available on Prime everywhere, looks like. Right now it’s around $10USD, $13CAD and £9.

  1. not by plane, though but it was often just rolling around naked in my bag
  2. No sex toys, but for other stuff yes I’ll occasionally shop there
  3. Would I get royalties? That’d be awesome
  4. This deformity only applies to the NEW Tango, the one that comes in bright blue, hot pink or white (with the kit) – if you have an older model Tango or Salsa then it fits perfectly without pushing the edges of the case, while still being perfectly snug and safe
 Posted by at 10:30 am
Oct 192015

BugUterusThe Eva by Dame Products was a crowd-funded vibrator – the Indiegogo campaign raised 1000% more money than they asked for. So while I remained skeptical, I thought “With all that extra money there’s no excuse now for not doing a ton of beta testing and employing a really awesome motor, and basically getting it really right, right out of the gate”. I had hopes, despite the fact that I really don’t like “couples vibes”1 that this here might actually be something that would work *with* my fat outer labia. I had hopes despite the really bizarre design of it. A lot of us dubbed it “The Bug”, but when I visited Bex and saw her stuffed uterus it hit me….IT’S A UTERUS.

My Eva was unveiled at a mini #blogsquad sleepover at Bex’s house the weekend of SHE NYC. I hadn’t even opened the box, since it arrived a few hours before I headed out to NY. I unpacked Eva and held it aloft and reactions were mixed. But then I turned Eva on…and my face fell like a bad souffle. I looked more dramatically sad and pathetic than Grumpy Cat. After 7 years in this business I know that companies are like real estate agents when it comes to describing their wares but the video for Eva tells you “We selected a small motor with a powerful kick” and this couldn’t honestly be further from the truth. The video contains nothing but glowing testimonies (naturally) from happy, hetero couples. Early online reviews made it sound awesome and super-powered. Literally, they talk about intense vibrations. I’m left wondering if they received the same vag bug that I did twice over, because it’s like I’m reading about another vibrator entirely. I appreciate the massive attention that the Eva by Dame Products received during crowdfunding simply because of the conversations it started on many corners of the internet. But in person, in actual use? I feel hoodwinked.

The Vibrations

Before we even delve into talking about the biggest factor of fit, we need to talk about the motor that Dame Products chose for the Eva. I have a lot of vibrators that are more powerful. On my personal scale, I’d probably rank Eva at a 2. The vibrations are shallow, surface-buzzy and extremely mild. I tried to go all Tantric with it and just relax, let go and watch some porn but….it wasn’t happening. It was never going to happen. It didn’t feel nice, it didn’t even feel soothing. I thought that perhaps the vibrations could add in to the amazing, almost-overwhelming, g-spot sensations I feel during sex but they made the vibrations of the Eva feel non-existent. These are some of the most sad vibrations I’ve felt in a long while. I realize I require more vibrations than a good portion of the population but I am able to be objective here. These vibrations are mild. I’ve had mild salsa that has more of a kick. Suffice to say, no one in the House of Bex that night was impressed with the vibrations2. I almost feel like the noise is making you think the vibrations are stronger than they are. It is noisier than I expected, that’s for sure. But if I turned up music so that I couldn’t hear the buzzing and tried to just relax and focus on nothing….nothing is what I felt. I felt barely a buzz. I really want to go to the houses of those early reviewers and demand to see their Bug because Houston, we have a fucking problem.

The Fit – Eva Takes the Vulva Tour

DameEvaComparisonBefore I tried it, Bex and Girly Juice tried it for fit. Both have a different vulva than I3, and I wanted to get a few opinions to be sure it’s not just my vulva that hates it. Neither used it during penetrative sex but were trying it out to see if it would even stay put under the best of circumstances (and test the vibrations). Due to a shipping snafu that Dame Products was kind enough to compensate for early on4, I received two Evas and so I sent one off to Sarah to try during penetrative sex.

The verdicts all around agreed that it’s frustrating to get it situated, and you generally feel like it’s falling out. At one point while Bex was doing a little dance she *thought* the Eva was staying put but instead we noticed one buggy leg poking out. That visual might honestly be the most hilarious sex toy blooper I’ve encountered yet. General accounts from GJ and Bex were that it took foreverrrr to wrangle it into place where it was staying put; more time than one would want to spend when in the midst of sex. It kept slipping, despite the fact that no sex was involved. The lack of decent vibrations wasn’t getting anyone anywhere, either.

I sent Sarah the bug to try out with her husband, and that resulted in something I didn’t expect – chafing. For Sarah, it sounds like her vulva is small5 (like she is!) and there was less space for Eva to hang out so during PIV it kept chafing his penis. They never could get to the point of deciding on whether or not it would have stayed put or helped her with orgasm. Again, it took a long time to get it properly in place for her – 10 minutes of fiddling around. Would this get better with multiple uses? Who knows. She felt that the third level of vibration was a little more powerful than she expected from my moaning about it, but it was very numbing.

My vulva is a bit like Bex’s, but my outer labia and mons is chubbier. I had no problems getting the Eva to stay put at first simply because my outer labia cover it up. When I wear the We-Vibe, my outer labia completely covers the We-Vibe. I don’t need to turn the We-Vibe Dusk into a Tango holder for my clit; my labia does that just fine (so long as I’m doing my usual of sitting in a chair). So yeah, the initial situating didn’t need much. But it kept popping up on one side, and subtly moved around a bit. With fairly average penetration it didn’t feel comfortable, I constantly worried about it and it simply was not worth the hassle for such piddly vibrations. This is one of those times where not only do I not need to test something a handful of times to be sure of my assessment, I don’t want to. Please, don’t make me use it again.

Why I just don’t like the Eva by Dame Products

If you like/need/prefer:

  • Pressure on your clitoris
  • Some degree of rumbling vibrations on your clitoris
  • The ability to rub your clitoris with the sex toy
  • Lube, and lots of it during sex (your own or from a bottle)
  • Moderately powerful vibrations, or more

Then the Eva by Dame Products is not for you. If there isn’t more than 1.75″ from your clitoris to your vaginal opening, the Eva isn’t for you. If you have minimal outer labia but long inner labia, the Eva may not be for you6 because the inner labia might get in the way. If you don’t like worrying about whether a hands-free vibrator is going to be truly hands-free and stay in place during sex, the Eva isn’t for you. If mild, buzzy vibrations piss you off and make you want to stomp bunnies, the Eva isn’t for you. Dame Products fully admits that the Eva will not work for every body; they do suggest that if it doesn’t stay in place for you on its own, then just apply a finger! Wait, that’s defeating their entire point. But here’s a tip: a vibrator that you are meant to hold in place *will* work with every vulva.

Frankly, I don’t think it’s worth the retail cost of $105. When I informed #SHEsquad of the price there were dropped jaws all around and “no fucking WAY” muttered a lot. Again – I’m happy that a sex toy did so well in a crowd-funding campaign if for the sheer reason that it got people talking. But I really feel that it made claims that the retail version of the Bug didn’t live up to. I’m let down that the end result is like a deflated balloon for me. If this is a powerful motor then I’m a monkey’s uncle.

Look I could talk more here about the design, how it’s meant to work, show you the cute drawings that Dame Products did to demonstrate, etc. I could talk about charging time or use time. I could have taken nice photos like Heather did. I could, but I’m not going to. Why? It’s irrelevant here; I’m not recommending this. I don’t see a point in getting that far into the conversation when I hate the product. You may wonder why I was skeptical about the product; am I just jaded? Too picky? Nay nay it goes beyond just that – first time products from baby companies coming from crowd-funded platforms rarely turn out well.

But hey, I can’t recommend the We-vibe, either, really. I’m on the fence about the Lelo Tiani 3. I think the Fixsation is more dumb than the Eva by Dame Products. I feel like they’re trying to work around fragile masculinity by having a vibrator that tries so hard to be unobtrusive7. Sex toys are tools, and they are fun and varied and they can make your sex (solo, coupled, thrupled, grouped) fun and varied. If what you’re doing is not working, then re-work it. So many people with clits need a vibrator for orgasm; and the overwhelming majority of those people just simply need clitoral stimulation period to orgasm – penetrative sex alone won’t cut it. And that’s fine! We have options for you! Find new positions that work with vibrators you hold in place. Maybe let go of that fairy-tale “let’s come at the same time or at least while my cock is still inside of you”. Consider how powerful it would be to have them come while your fingers are inside of them and you have the best view in the house. Consider how much more sensitive your g-spot will be to the rubbing of a dildo or penis after you’ve had a clitoral orgasm *first*. Genitals are different in looks, sensitivity, how they respond best to touch, if they even like vibrations. Sex is messy and fun and like a Rubik’s cube – there’s more than one way to solve the puzzle and sometimes when the colors are a jumbled rainbow it’s just as pretty as when they all line up. And there are hundreds of regular vibrators out there and you can find a way to incorporate them into a re-worked vision of the sex you want to have – way better odds than the half-dozen half-assed “couples vibrators”.  /rant

This will only be relevant for a short time but if you want to support an Indiegogo campaign for a vibrator that actually DOES have a lot of power and comes from a veteran sex toy company proven to use many real live beta testers, then support the Tantus Rumble campaign.

My thanks to Shevibe for sending over the Eva by Dame Products in exchange for my (brutally honest) review.

  1. because they often just don’t work as promised, have lackluster vibrations and seem overpriced to play on the sex toy anxiety that people have over bringing a proper sex toy to bed – but, more on this later in the review
  2. I took an informal poll to get the idea of what we all like and need. Bex’s faves are Mona 2, Siri 2 and We-Vibe Touch; the least powerful she’s been able to get off with is the Bswish Bcurious. For GJ: Preferred vibes: Eroscillator (settings 2-3), Tango (usually settings 2-3 also), Siri 2 (middle-to-high settings). Weakest vibe that’s gotten her off: probably the original Lelo Gigi. For Sarah: favorite vibes for clitoral stimulation are Lelo Mona 2, Siri 2, We-Vibe Touch (either). The weakest toy that gets her off is the Tenga Iroha Mini. So you can see that these people don’t REQUIRE a powerhouse vibe. I would say that the weakest vibes able to get me off is either Lelo Mia 2 or the Crave Vesper, but the We-Vibe Tango is my go-to, and I can come on level 1 and the L’amourose Rosa Rouge is a big hit
  3. You can see GJ’s vulva because she had a RING made! And Bex is a lot like me, just her outer labia aren’t as fat as mine. With hers, she didn’t really cover up the bug much but my labia completely covers the bug
  4. The tracking for the first Bug stalled out for way longer than it should have, leading us to believe it was lost in the mail. My review product was sent to me by Dame Products but should you purchase from Shevibe, it will come directly from them. We also had a shipping snafu that was NOT good, wherein they put my blogging name on the package and then they briefly tweeted the tracking link to my second package, so I’m very very happy to report that shipping is handled by Shevibe. Your discretion will be assured
  5. In her words:  “I have “porn star” (there has to be a better way to say that) outer labia with inner labia that flay out a little bit if my outer labia are apart, but they don’t hang. My inner labia got in the way of the Eva, and it chafed at my partner’s penis because of how close my clit is to my vaginal canal.”
  6. This is starting to sound like a sex toy version of Jeff Foxworthy’s “Here’s Your Sign” monologue. Feel free to go read that in his voice. You’re welcome
  7. I understand that there are going to be plenty of other clitoris-owners who disagree heavily with me, they have bought into and want the fairytale of the perfectly unobtrusive, hands-free, dream vibrator and maybe they even have one of the couples vibes and it works really well for them. Great! If you use one and like it, more power to you. I just can’t help but feel that it is also working on that “porno sex” ideal that many of us have felt the need to live up to – where they always come together and she is always highly orgasmic just from penetrative sex while he ignores her clitoris
 Posted by at 10:27 am
Oct 142015

SilicaGelSilicone. It’s the “gold standard” material of sex toys for most, and it’s also the material we’re the most leery about. You see, for years we were tricked. For years we were sold silicone sex toys that were anything but, because there are no regulations and they can tell us it’s made of fucking unicorn poop and wouldn’t get into trouble. So we started taking a lighter to it and calling it out when we’d find something that didn’t deliver on its claims. The industry seems to have gotten a lot better with silicone usually being silicone, and us seeing more affordable silicone options.

But we still have a lot of confusion. I recently cleared up the whole Sil-a-gel debate (additive; not material) but I keep getting asked about Silicon and “Medical Grade Silica Gel”. Take a guess at where we’ve heard the latter. Come on, I’ll give you three guesses. Yep, AMAZON. Ebay. AliExpress. So I decided I had no choice but spend some money and see what is what.

Is Medical Grade Silica Gel Even a Thing??

The term “medical grade silica gel” is coming up so often on the sites I don’t recommend you shop at for a major reason: I suspect it’s a language barrier thing. When you see it you can assume that the listing is made by one of those companies that is selling knock-offs and cheap crappy toys straight from the China plant they were made in. Most of the items listed on Amazon as “medical grade silica gel” shipped from China; it was hard for me to find some that were on Prime (because I’m cheap AND impatient). The other thing I notice: On most listings that say “medical grade silica gel” they ALSO say “medical grade silicone” somewhere in there, or just silicone. The only thing I can find for silica gel is the desiccant stuff; it’s found in hard pellets. It’s related to silicon. It’s NOT a sex toy material and should never be trusted. I think that if you see something listed as this, run the other direction. You have a 2 out of 3 chance that it’s not silicone.

The first item I picked, I picked because it obviously wasn’t silicone – the material is crystal clear. This rabbit is weird and cheap and who would want soft spines?? Anyway, what’s interesting is now the listing mentions nothing of medical grade silica gel, or silicone. You can see in the screencaps below that it used to. It’s now listed properly as TPE.  It’s a good thing I got screencaps; I did that initially because I assumed that at some point they would stop selling the item. I didn’t realize some would actually change the material listing.

SilicaGel6 SilicaGel7

The second item I chose because it looked like it *could* be silicone, and it was cheap and didn’t come directly from China. On Amazon, it’s called  Utimi brand – the rabbit up above did come in branded packaging that said Utimi, but this blue thing came branded as Shaki. Hey, it’s not the first time they called it one brand on Amazon and I got another. This Utimi brand also wasn’t the only brand I tried to purchase – I tried to purchase two others of a different brand, from a different seller, but they both were canceled. The listing showed something like “12 in stock” but then shortly after ordering it was canceled. They wrote to tell me they’re sorry, it’s out of stock. And never coming back in. And here’s a refund. It felt kinda shady, if I’m honest. Oh have I mentioned that my user profile on Amazon links to my blog? Is that relevant? hmmm

SilicaGel3 SilicaGel4

And the third item is a little bunion-protector/toe separator. I’ve seen these and similar foot things on the site just as silicone, or as the silica gel. I actually purchased something similar a few months back, looking for a cushioning heel cup. I thought the material felt identical to the Tenga Eggs, but since I wanted to return the item I chose not to burn it. There are a ton of these on the market, most are listed incorrectly in terms of material, and the material looked a lot different than the rabbit. Since the “frost” sorta reminds me of the white O2 layer on some Tantus toys, I thought there actually was a chance it could be super-soft silicone.

SilicaGel2 SilicaGel1

The burn verdict: The crystal clear rabbit was obviously not silicone, but we knew that just by looking. The material lit up easily and burned like an oil lamp, the material merely melting/deforming. No ash. The blue thing behaved exactly like silicone – a scorch mark I wiped away, ash when it finally caught a bit of a burn, not much material destruction. The toe thing? Behaved just like the crystal clear rabbit – it burned bright, hot and easily with obvious deforming/melting and no ash.


The use of silicon vs silicone doesn’t really seem to be a cultural thing or a language-barrier thing; I’ve seen all variety of people misusing this term. It becomes even more confusing then, and makes us side-eye real hard, when a manufacturer rep uses that term on social media.

Silicon (Si) is not silicone. Not even close. It does eventually make up another awesome sex toy material though – glass. Guess where else it’s naturally found? Quartz. This isn’t something that eventually makes up your average soft dildo, folks. Whether it’s a typo or just a lack of understanding of science and the elemental chart, the use is too common and should be corrected whenever you see it. Does seeing it being used mean that they may be lying? I’m not sure. It’s too easy to mix up the two when you are not paying attention to basic material information.


Silicone can be a liquid or a solid. People sometimes say “silicone rubber” and they don’t mean they think it’s a blend, they’re saying it to convey that it is a rubber-like version of a silicone product. I’ve also seen some say “silicone elastomer” to convey the same meaning, but without the negative connotations of the word “rubber” (they don’t realize it’s redundant to us, and makes us wary). It can be super soft and squishy, or really firm. Silicone can hold onto strong odors1. It won’t melt when it touches other cured silicone products. It’s essentially non-porous and bacteria, mold, and other fungi won’t breed and make homes in the tiny pores. When you burn it, if it catches, you’ll see a light grey ash. It can be cheap or expensive.

But please, don’t ever call it ‘Silicon’ and run from places that say ‘Medical grade silica gel’.

  1. yes, you can get rid of the odors, yes I’ll write about that down the line
 Posted by at 3:00 pm