Oct 092016
 

Crowned Jewels Aluminum and Anodized Titanium Sex Toys - Image shows two bright silver aluminum dildos and 1 vivid deep purple-pink anodized titanium dildo on teal distressed woodCrowned Jewels as a brand name might not make you think “sex toys” but the surprise is worth it. Gorgeous, well-made aluminum or titanium alloy1 dildos, butt plugs, cock rings and more. Njoy was probably the first brand to really bring amazing metal sex toys to the masses; the Pure Wand is so good that after I tried it very early on in my reviewing career it ended up ruining me for pretty much most other dildos – yes, it was that good for me. The problem with cult classics, though, is that they are often imitated. We’ve seen a number of Njoy knock-offs on the market2 but Crowned Jewels is an ethical company, and is creating their own designs. Yes, it’s possible to create different designs in metal! You don’t have to resort to copycat productions! There’s a lot to love about Crowned Jewels; I’m excited about their current line and excited to see what they’ll come up with next. The possibilities of their own, girthy design combined with the trademark lightness of their aluminum alloy mean that a large dildo could be had without the extreme heft of the Njoy Eleven or the glass Double Trouble.

Crowned Jewels – Titanium Anodized

I wanna talk about the Titanium models first because they’re the most …vexing? Titanium is more hefty than aluminum – to compare, the exact same model in titanium vs aluminum is 4 ounces heavier (9.5 vs 5.5 for the diminutive aluminum). So for folks who like moderate weight, the titanium might be something to consider but really the biggest pull here is that the titanium models can be anodized in some pretty great colors. Unfortunately you’re paying a lot for the privilege of pretty colors – over 100 pounds more! And I have to say that the color isn’t represented well on the website – and this is my sole complaint about the Crowned Jewels products.  Uberkinky is selling Crowned Jewels on AmazonUK, and the photos used there seem to be a closer representation to the actual color. If my packaging hadn’t confirmed Magenta, I would have assumed I had the purple color.

Crowned Jewels Titanium Anodized Color Comparison

Anodizing is neat, and the colors change with your touch; I don’t understand it so I’m hoping to get feedback here on that. You can see a difference in the photo above, where it’s me handling it vs a freshly polished-with-cotton look. And lighting matters, too. Outside on bright, yet overcast, day the color is vivid. Indoors with incandescent lights the color is decidedly more purple than magenta, and quite muted. Now normally I wouldn’t make such a fuss over this color issue because even when the color looks its “worst” it’s still pretty – but if you only see the colors on their website and are specifically paying the high price to get THAT color? You may be disappointed.

Crowned Jewels Magenta Titanium Color Compare

A Luxury Experience

I’ve come across some very lovely sex toy packaging in my time, but none so posh as Crowned Jewels. First, they’re sealed up like a Christmas cracker in black tissue paper, with a logo sticker. Then there is the black tube with the metal lid, sealed with ribbon and a legit wax seal. Crack that open (reluctantly) to find more black tissue paper and a lovely satin drawstring bag, which itself is even a step or two above most included satin bags – it’s black on the outside and silver satin on the inside and feels more like the early Lelo storage pouches – no single layer of thin satin here; no crinkly weird fabric either. Unwrapping is a process and by making it 5 steps it forces you to slow down and appreciate what you’re about to see.

There are brands of sex toys that just scream “perfect gift” and Crowned Jewels is one. Your recipient will be enthralled with the unboxing.

Aluminum vs Stainless Steel

It’s a little harder to compare aluminum vs stainless steel here because the designs of Crowned Jewels are so different from Njoy. But the biggest plus to their aluminum alloy is the weight – or lack of it. The “Classic” (smaller) Shaftsbury barely scoots past the 5.5 ounce mark, while the larger Grande Mayfair is 9 ounces – the Njoy Pure Wand is nearly a full pound heavier than the Grande Mayfair 1 pound 8.5 ounces. The heft of the Pure Wand lends to its amazing qualities yet is also a hindrance for many people with grip issues, arthritis, fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel, and more. I have often been in pain after a rapid-thrusting session with my Pure Wand.

Both metals are great for temperature play; I found that stainless steel was able to retain a little bit more body-warmth from use than the aluminum, but aluminum still warms up wonderfully – and chills down well, too.

Tiny Metal

Crowned Jewels Mayfair and Shaftsbury aluminum, Shaftsbury Titanium, compared to the Njoy Pure Wand for size and shape. Right now Crowned Jewels doesn’t have anything for folks who feel that bigger is better. Many may find even their Grande choices are too small – the largest one that Shevibe is stocking is 1.35″ at the widest spot. The Classics are pretty small, but this could be a good thing for a number of folks! The slick metal barely needs any lubrication for vaginal play. The gentle bloops on the smaller end of the Mayfair or the plain Eros would be great for those who have trouble with girth and friction.

I don’t feel comfortable telling you that the dildos are anal safe. With the Njoy Pure Wand, even if the large bulb isn’t acting as a semi-flared base, the sheer weight of it is likely going to prevent it from being lost to the vacuum properties of most butts. 5.5 ounces is a vast difference to 24.5 ounces and I don’t think you should use these for anal play. Luckily Crowned Jewels has made some fucking gorgeous butt plugs, and they all have a silicone base that is sparkly and looks like a gorgeous granite. And the buttplugs are called “Upminster” which I love.

How Does it Feel, Though?

In use, the Mayfair is definitely comfortable. It’s light enough that I experienced no twinges of pain and no hand cramping. But I cannot help to compare it with the Pure Wand and the shape of the Pure Wand is simply my ideal – from the drastic C curve to the prominent ball which aggressively pings my g-spot. The ball of the Pure Wand also catches on my pubic bone, but that’s okay for me – I’m well-padded there and that’s where my g-spot is. I like really firm pressure on my g-spot. My g-spot doesn’t want to be seduced, it doesn’t want a gentle lover. My g-spot needs it hard & fast, rough and aggressive. For a number of folks the Pure Wand doesn’t work because of this aggressive nature, and catching their pubic bone on a metal dildo is painful. For those folks, I point you to Crowned Jewels. The “classic” sizes are just too small for me, like the Shaftsbury.  I feel like if the Farringdon “C” Curve were made in a larger size, it would be a better match for me.

At first I was super bummed that I couldn’t honestly report the orgasmic properties of the Crowned Jewels dildo. But then I realized that orgasm doesn’t equal endorsement. I’ve wrung orgasms out of highly unpleasant vibrators. I adore the brand; their ethics, their materials, their vision. Despite how badly I’ve love to see an aluminum version of the Pure Wand, I’m delighted to see that they are above producing copycat designs. I see a lot of potential for the future but also a lot of promise for people who are not my vagina-twins.

For those who want a smaller, more gentle metal dildo experience, I cannot recommend Crowned Jewels enough. If you’re in the UK, you can purchase directly from Crowned Jewels and if you’re in the US you can find select models at Shevibe.com.  Crowned Jewels sent me these items in exchange for my honest opinion.

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  1. They can’t be JUST aluminum or titanium but their site does specifically say “nickel free” – if you have other metal allergies, please email them first and they’ll happily let you know if their alloy is safe for you
  2. Some, like Pipedream, are made from an easily-noticed lesser grade of metal but others are unknown- that’s the problem with metal, there’s no easy at-home test to understand if you have a body-safe hypo-allergenic metal or if the alloy will contain something irritating or if it will be prone to rusting
  • Vi Jane

    Hi Lilly,
    Thank you for such a lovely, open and honest review of us and our products!
    As always, we love getting feedback on our company and our products so we can grow and improve what we do and your point of view has given me lots of good things to think about and work on.
    I appreciate your comments on the colours – they are quite difficult to photograph and portray them accurately. As you pointed out – different lighting alters the colours, so we will take that on board and look to offer different shots to give our customers a more exact idea of what they would be getting. Perhaps some shots of all the colours side by side would help too.
    As we make all our toys here ourselves, we are able to offer the option of a tighter curve on any of the Titanium Dildos (at no extra charge) and hopefully on our Aluminium ones in the future, for customers that have a preference for more of an acute ‘C’ shape – again, something I need to make clearer on our website.
    If you require a custom shape when purchasing, please ask us or the lovely people at She Vibe and we will make it so.
    We would love to make a larger dildo! We are just trying to decide which design would be best or whether to make a completely new one….
    Now, back to the workshop. Dildos to polish, butt plugs to make. Never a dull moment!
    Many thanks,
    Vi Jane
    Crowned Jewels

  • Kalliopeia

    Anodized titanium is soooo gorgeous. I have a ring of it, and it’s just lovely. I will keep this in mind for when I’m out of grad school and can afford beautiful things like this.

  • Weirdo

    So is titanium non-porous and body safe?

    Do they have put some sort of coating on it or do something else to it to make it safe? Or is this an inherent property of titanium?

  • 🎃⭐aj⭐👻

    Titanium is definitely nonporous and body safe! I can’t say for sure but I doubt that any coating would be necessary. (Personally I’m more concerned about the body safeness of aluminum.)

    It’s often used in high quality body jewelry/piercing because it’s nickel-free and much less likely to cause allergies than stainless steel, and is also autoclave safe. I’ve worn titanium nose ring (one was anodized in a rainbow pattern!) for almost 5 years straight and had no problems with it. I know this is just anecdotal evidence, and plus, I’m not a piercer (though I have learned a lot about it just out of interest) but it was up against broken, freshly pierced skin/mucus membrane for about three or four months while it healed, and I think there isn’t a respectable piercer that wouldn’t tell you titanium is quite body safe.

    There’s a lot of crossover between the safest body jewelry materials and the best sex toy materials, (some metals, glass, and to some extent, silicone) which I think is neat! I was actually just wondering the other day whether any companies had made toys with other metals besides stainless steel, like titanium, haha.

  • Vi Jane

    Hi
    Thank you for your question.
    All our Titanium products are non-porous and totally body safe. We use Medical Grade Titanium that is totally inert and we hand forge each item. We use no coatings, we just polish the metal to a lovely slick and shiny finish. The colours are achieved by anodising the metal by placing them in a bath of a special, harmless liquid and passing a current through it. Different currents cause different colours. It changes how the surface of the metal reflects and refracts the light, giving it a different colour. We know that this is a completely safe process and it is not a coating.
    Our Aluminium is non porous too, due to each product also being hand forged – unlike Far-Eastern, cheap, low quality products that rely on being cast and that means that they are porous.
    Adding colour to Aluminium or anodising (a very different process to anodising titanium) means filling the porous surface with dye and then sealing it by using an acid chemical process. The dye can be boiling-water sealed, but this process, although safer for the body, is one that is seldom used nowadays. I’m not sure how porous or safe the finished products are, so this is a process that we choose not to do.
    We make all our toys ourselves in our workshops in Great Britain and send all our metals for independent testing to double check their purity before they go up for sale, ensuring that we only make and sell safe toys, that are nickel, lead and cadmium free.
    I hope that helps!
    If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.
    Thanks!
    Vi Jane
    Crowned Jewels Limiited

  • It’s not pure aluminum, it’s an alloy. It’s also not the first time it’s been used for sex toys (Tantus had an aluminum line for a little while).

    The difference between the titanium and aluminum is nothing like the difference between those and stainless steel, but there is a small difference.