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e[lust] is turning ten!

Ten editions, that is.

Ten….it doesn’t sound like a lot, when you think about it. But to me, it is. 4 months and 10 editions means I can finally breathe a little easier during submissions time. So far I’ve always watched the inbox and feared that the submission count would drop this edition, that it was all losing steam. The numbers have fluctuated but all in all are doing quite well.

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HNT: Pretty, Girly Details

I’m a sucker for beautiful underthings. Sadly, the ones I pine for don’t usually come in my size. So when I see beautiful bras in my size I snap them up. Even if all they’re destined for is to be a sex bra.

The Bordello Bra

 

 

The Sluttified Bra

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Bra shopping fail

Off I went last week to my local Lane Bryant Outlet store to replace one of the newer “really uplifting” bras I purchased last summer. After being pretty sure that the bra I picked up was the same one that died recently, I grabbed one and threw it on my pile.

By the time I got around to trying it on, I’m standing there in just panties, trying to get this damn thing hooked – the security tag was making it difficult. It wasn’t until it was hooked that I found out exactly why. And holy hell did it HURT!

See that white cone-shaped thing there? That dug into my back. The flat side is what is supposed to be against your skin. But come on now, LB….isn’t there a less obtrusive place to put these damn things?!?

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Ask Lilly: Choosing a Male Masturbator

When guys email me for sex toy buying advice for themselves, one of the two topics is choosing a masturbator sleeve. There’s many different types out there. The infamous Fleshlight; the colorful ones that aren’t meant to resemble any part of female (or male) anatomy; and the larger ones that are molded from a porn star and are a big heavy hunk of rubber that is basically the whole pelvic region, like the naughty bits section was sliced out of a mannequin. A Japanese company, Tenga, makes a whole bunch of pricey one-time-use jobs (baffling, really) and then their piece-de-resistance: The Fliphole.

Time and again there’s only two I’ll recommend: The Fleshlight and the Tenga Fliphole. Yeah, they’re more expensive than a simple jelly rubber sleeve but you’re going to enjoy them a whole hell of a lot more. One concern I hear a lot though from men considering this is: cleaning. They don’t always want to get out of bed after jerking off and clean their masturbator – they, understandably, want to roll over and go to sleep. I get it, I do. Been there, done that. While I don’t recommend you make a habit out of it, you can let it go till morning sometimes. Just keep in mind though that lube and semen wash off much more easily when wet instead of dry.

DESIGN

Fleshlight: The sleeves and the cases are able to separate for both cleaning and to try out different sleeves with different textures and internal widths. The sleeve is open at both ends for cleaning and for suction adjustment. Fleshlight can be nondescript and the design is, obviously, meant to resemble a flashlight (but not realistically). You can get the sleeves in Beige, Pink or Clear. You can get the cases in a few different colors, too. The common is pink sleeve w black casing. The first Fleshlight I bought my husband was the all clear one, so that when I used it on him I could see what’s going on. There is a bit of a difference though in the materials, the clear sleeve is a little more sticky/tacky when not dusted in cornstarch. The colored ones feel more realistic.

Tenga Flip hole: There’s only two different textures with the Fliphole and if you want to try both you have to buy both, they don’t have removable sleeves. However, the Fliphole opens clam-shell style to make cleaning (and drying) easier and more thorough. Fliphole looks…..geeky and techie and not like a sex toy but its cool and unique enough that if someone sees it, chances are they’ll ask what it is.

CLEANING

Fleshlight: You have to clean these after use or you will ruin them in short order from what I’ve heard from various sources. (however one of the top male toy reviewers at EF says he has put off cleaning until morning a number of times and no mold ever occurred)  Due to the material you can’t use anything other than water (yes, this means no soap), maybe some isopropyl alcohol if you really need it. Which means it can take longer since it’s a tube and you can only use water. You have to let it dry completely in a ventilated area or it could mildew. My husband wraps his up in a paper towel and then perches it upright in the case.

Tenga Fliphole: Splits in half clam-shell style and you can use water & mild soap to clean them. You can switch around the base to fashion a stand for the Fliphole so that it it can dry standing up and partially open.

HOW IT FEELS

Fleshlight: They  say that Fleshlight feels more real compared to any other masturbator. You can let the sleeve (and even the lube) sit in a sink full of warm water to bring it up to body temperature. The material is phthalate-free but it’s also porous so it can’t be shared – it’s a softer material with more “give” to it, more like flesh. Fleshlight can more easily accomodate a larger variety of cocks in term of length, girth and sensitivity levels all by changing up the sleeve. The sleeves have different orifice entrances – vaginal, mouth, anal – which offer a different visual look as well as a slight change in sensation. You can vary the suction a little bit by the screw-cap base, having it off or on or partially on.

Hubby has now tried two sleeves – the Clear Non-descript and the Pink Wonder Wave. He got the Non-descript style first, and enjoyed it. I liked being there and watching, able to see what was goin on. When we first opened up the packaging though the sleeve was a little cold; combine that with the sticky and I was mildly squicked. The sticky went away though as soon as it was wet. He liked it; but required the extra tightness of his own hand to kick over that final ledge to orgasm. The non-descript and other “original” orifices are all the same tunnel style – smooth (no texture) and the biggest width. It’s good for guys who are really girthy or really sensitive. Even though Hub is girthy, he prefers more sensation so he ended up liking the Wonder Wave better. Also we both felt that the Pink material felt a little more realistic than the Clear. I would find myself fondling it, actually…….

*ahem*

Anyways. While he didn’t think that the Fleshlight was *better* than real live vaginal or oral sex, he did find it to be a very nice alternative to his hand. Not necessarily his everyday preferred method, but he really likes it. The Non-Descript was 3/4″ tunnel and the Wonder Wave is 1/2″. There are ones that are more snug (with no texture) and ones with more intense texture. The Non-Descript is rated a 1 out of 5 on the “Intensity” scale that Fleshlight uses, whereas the Wonder Wave is a 3 out of 5. For frame of reference, Hubby is about 1.75″ diameter or so and 7.5″ in length. For men that fall into the average cock size range in length and girth, and who like a more intense sensation, Fleshlight came out with their “Sex in a Can” line.  The material of the Fleshlight is super stretchy and soft so that 1/2″ wide tunnel didn’t feel constrictive, just snug. All in all though, the Clear Non-Descript we’ll only use when I’m there; he much prefers the snugness and texture of the Wonder Wave.

Tenga Fliphole: From what I’ve read (we haven’t tried one yet) the material is a little bit more firm but the original Fliphole White still has a lot of texture to it. It’s not meant to replicate the feel of a real, live vagina but I’ve read/been told that it’s still a really great sensation. The Fliphole has three buttons along its length to change up the suction/tightness. You can make it more snug at the head than the base, more snug at the base than the head, etc. The newer Fliphole Black has a more extreme texture to it.

FINAL WORDS

Lube. Lubelubelubelubelube……and more lube. Water-based lube for the Fleshlight, Tenga according to manufacturer’s directions. Try out a few different viscosities of lube to see what feels the best, and always keep your lube nearby in case you need to “refill” during use.

And also….you get what you pay for. Saving money on the cheap ones, 9 times out of 10, will just leave you disappointed.

*You can also read my more technical review of just the clear non-descript which I wrote up in detail over at EdenFantasys.

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Review: The Fleshlight Ice (clear model)

This review originally appeared over at Edenfantasys

The Fleshlight – perhaps one of the most revered names in male masturbators, it lends a hand (er, I mean, pussy/ass/mouth) when you want variety. And, it’s a much better way to achieve variety than “The Stranger” method of masturbating. In fact that aspect was the first thing that my husband really commented on – he had never masturbated like this before, so it was unique and good that he could only feel the sensations on his penis….not his hand. There are a variety of ways that Fleshlight and its users have come up with to aide in this “it’s not my hand” aspect of it, including the ever popular methods of putting the Fleshlight (in it’s case) in a shoe, or wedged between your mattress and box spring.

I got him the clear/”ice” version of this because I planned to also use this item on him or just together, in addition to him using it on his own. I really liked the visual aspect of it.

This is the first that either of us have seen a masturbator in person. When it arrived it had been in a cold UPS truck all day so the Fleshlight was cold too. We opened it up, he took out the sleeve from the bag and we inspected it. He handed it to me and I squealed. It was THE most bizarre thing I’ve ever felt! Almost creepy. I can’t even describe it, really. Soft and fleshy but not quite like a real vagina because it was too soft and squishy for that.

It arrived doused with a healthy coating of cornstarch because the material is sticky/tacky if there’s no cornstarch. The cornstarch clouds the material, though, so if you want it to be as see-thru as possible, you should rinse off your cornstarch coating (but I recommend coating it for storage, since it is so sticky and will attract fur/lint/dust). When he soaked the Fleshlight in warm water the cornstarch came off and we found out just how sticky/tacky the material is. You expect your own skin to be sticky, as well, but there’s no transference of that. I had questioned him on if that was distracting or bothersome during use because it made the skin on his balls and his pubic hair stick to it every time he took the Fleshlight to the base of his cock, he said (through gasps) that no, no, it was no problem!

The non-descript style is the largest canal that Fleshlight offers, and on their intensity scale of 1 to 5, it’s a 1. My husband is a little larger than average, about 8″ x 1.75″ across (diameter?) so while this wasn’t as tight & full of sensation as he can get with his own hand, it was still really fun for him. I wouldn’t recommend this type of canal to guys who are less than 1.25″ diameter.

I *would* recommend this canal to guys who are both over 1.5″ diameter and prefer a smooth feeling, who feel their cocks are a little more sensitive.

The case that comes with the clear sleeve is also, of course, clear. I wouldn’t call this version then completely discreet but yet it still doesn’t scream “masturbator” to me.

If you have small hands, holding this thing with one hand might be a bit cumbersome.

The Fleshlight feels much better when it’s been warmed under running water, however, since there is then no cornstarch to cut down on the tackiness of the sleeve, it makes it just a bit tricky to get it situated in the case. I was surprised though to find out that when the sleeve is thoroughly wet from water it is not at all sticky. I tried to see if I could achieve the soaking method with the sleeve still in the case. I left the top cap on so that the opening could also sit in the warm tap water, and filled it up from the bottom. This did indeed work, but do it in the sink because water will drip out from the top cap’s threads. Since you need to clean it up after use, it doesn’t matter if there’s some moisture inside the case.

The Fleshlight functions best with the “more lube is good lube” mindset. In the first run with the toy, he found that he had to re-apply twice because the lube absorbed into his skin. He was using plain ID Glide lube so perhaps there is a more superior, compatible lube.

As Fleshlight will tell you, no silicone lubes please! It will ruin the material. There are tons of water-based lubes out there for you to choose from.

The canal of the non-descript, “Original”, is pretty open – I could put a finger in the hole from the bottom and still have a tiny bit of wiggle room – so running water through it should be very easy. You can’t clean it with anything other than water and isopropyl alcohol if really needed. If you find that rinsing off the plastic case isn’t as simple, you can indeed use soapy water but just rinse it really well before you put the sleeve in.

The sleeve needs to dry out thoroughly before being stored in any air-tight containers, so my husband put a micro-fiber towel down through the opening and wrapped a second one around the sleeve. After the outside was dry he put it in the case, leaving off both lids and setting the whole thing on the micro-fiber towel.

I recommend dusting it with cornstarch when it’s dry, because the sticky nature of the material will attract all sorts of gross crap.

“Better than a shampoo bottle!”

…….that was his witty “any last thoughts?” statement. I shook my head and said “I’m not saying that” and then I thought “meh, fuck it. half the men will get it.” and if not, then my husband’s masturbation tactics as a stupid teenager are bizarre and we should laugh at him for it. Either way, there ya go. Does the Fleshlight rival me? Will he use it every single time? No. But it’s definitely an “every other time” excursion, until he finds an even better Fleshlight sleeve.

I also see this being pulled out during foreplay sessions once my jaw gets tired.

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