Posted by Lilly | 6 Comments
Our Life Is Not a Movie, or Maybe
If you worked in my building, if you saw me on the streets, if you met me at a party, would you ever guess I write this blog and post these pictures and do what I secretly do?
Probably not.
Outside of my partner, no one in “real life” knows about this blog. This is the case for many many (most) blogs I read. It is the case for many others, this blurry line between “real 3D life” and the virtual reality world we have created between IM and email and blogs and commenting and Twitter. So when I was at the party back in November, it was very surreal to be meeting these people whom, for some, I knew intimately from the neck down – “It’s so nice to put a face with the tits!” – and more surreal to be called Lilly as if it were my real name. But I got used to it, I got used to hearing it. It’s not a huge deviation from my real first name anyways.
Last night I met Naughty Secretary, whom I’ve been chatting up online for a number of months. We only live a few hours apart, it’s a wonder we waited so long! But we’re lazy. The reason for the monumental occasion was her birthday party.
First, let me ask this to other bloggers who’ve met bloggers: Were you surprised by how….”normal” the other person looked? I mean many of us post risque or pornographic photos, artistic nudes, words to make your mother blush. But you wouldn’t peg us into that at first look or first conversation even. Right? Have you ever been let down? Expected someone more flashy? Or do you, like me, merely sit there in the quiet moments and think “But you don’t look kinky!!” (as Catalina said of Nadia‘s MasterDoc when meeting him at the NYC party). Take, for example, NS’s man. As I played Go Fish with this guy, glared at him for taking my damn 8′s, or merely listened to him in conversation with others, the contrast between what I knew about him from her and what I saw in front of me proved moreso that you really really cannot peg kinky unless they’re dressed in kink leather gear or something. So I wonder what people think of me.
As I said, no one in my “real life” knows about my blog. When I might speak of those I’ve met online because of the blog, I’m always at a loss to say how I know them. I usually gloss over that. But at NS’s party, everyone there knew or would know that she has a sexblog and writes erotica. I was also introduced as such to everyone there at some point in the evening. It was surreal. Did they think “Really?? Her????”.
She’s awesome to hang out with, by the way. But no I wouldn’t peg her without knowing that she writes erotica so professionally. So deftly does she blur the line between fact and fiction on her blog that one never knows which is which.
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I got a new cell phone Friday. This was a harried occasion, I found out from the person who’s plan I had been on that they decided not to renew their contract. I couldn’t complain, I wasn’t paying for it (call it compensation for 3 years of brutal hell working for the man), but 2 days notice leaves one in a bit of a bind.
I really wanted a Blackberry but couldn’t yet afford the monthly plan for it – Later this year I hope to, and I might need more internet access in a phone because I still have no earthly idea what will happen when my department merges with another and we move to a different building. My job duties will likely change and there’s a decent chance I’ll lose internet access. I’ve mentioned it before. It makes me realize how damn attached I am to it. But it’s not something one can ask in their interviews for a new position/job – “Will I have internet access here so I can fuck around during the workday here and there (and everywhere)?”
So now I have this cool little AT&T Quickfire phone – all sorts of new for me with its QWERTY keypad and touchscreen. The photos that it takes are bigger than my last phone, I’m sure you’ll appreciate them more. I had originally gone with AT&T because I thought I’d want an iPhone. Indeed there are all these cool apps and the camera is awesome and blahblahblah. BUT it’s entirely touchscreen, you cannot use a stylus, and this phone I have now is making me feel like I have fat fingertips. So I do believe I would launch my iPhone across the room in short order, therefore, a Crackberry is the most advanced I’ll likely ever go.
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My patience is waning. I am getting bored more easily these days. I have become fickle and keeping my attention is not an easy feat. I will flippantly cut a blog from my public or feed reader blogroll. Quit following someone’s updates on Twitter. Glare suspiciously at the constant 1-2 dozen of people sitting there in my Twitter queue that want to be allowed to follow my updates and I reject most of them. If I don’t know you or know of you, it’s not real likely, honestly. I view Twitter differently than a lot of people, I think.
I am removing people from my IM buddy lists and my cell phone and email contacts. I am culling. I don’t know why, or what the end result will be. S, for example, disappeared around the holidays. Only to come back a few weeks later all apologies and valid (family) reasons. Fine….but then he’d disappear again. Come back again, disappear again. I’d hear from him for an email or two in 24 hours and then nothing for 2 weeks. And to be honest, I just lost interest. I’m not willing to get invested in a play relationship or friendship who disappears more than Houdini. Sigh….next!
As I trim the dead I realize that the ones I am keeping in contact with are the important ones, the only ones who really matter. I am not a social butterfly, I keep my circle tight. And even within that circle is an inner circle of which there are only a handful – at the end of the day only their prescence matters.
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This is the “Sunday-morning-I’m-not-totally-sober-or-awake-and-the-bed-is-comfy-but-here-try-out-my-new-phone” photo. Thrilling, eh?
All text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere. To obtain permission, email dangerouslilly @ gmail.com
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Sugasm 158
The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #159? Submit a link to your best post of the week by emailing me directly at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.
This Week’s Picks
Sealing the Deal
“A hand reached down and grabbed my chin firmly, pulling it up to get a look at my face.”
Wait for me on your knees.
“She’s not scared or wincing but open and accepting, drinking in the sensation.”
What DO Women Want?
“This cultural context also means that what research describes might not be how things actually are, but how the current culture is shaping them to be.”
Sugasm Editor
Sex Work And Honesty: Political Opinions
Editor’s Choice
Like Rube Goldberg
See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.
Read MoreAll text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere. To obtain permission, email dangerouslilly @ gmail.com
Posted by Lilly | 22 Comments
HNT: Sheer Contrast
What could be better than underwear (meant to cover, protect and conceal) that reveals?
Lacy, sheer and pretty.
The contrast between black lace and pale skin.
Contrast
Textured lace vs. Smooth skin
Black vs. White
The public me vs. The private me
Brat vs. submissive
Real world vs. Blog world
Bitch vs. Caretaker
Tortured vs. Pleasured
I am a study in contrast. Keep up if you can…
Read More
All text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere. To obtain permission, email dangerouslilly @ gmail.com
Posted by Lilly | 13 Comments
Stairwell
Do you see that stairwell there? That very well-lit and glassed-in stairwell?
He had me there. Yes, I do mean he fucked me there.
The indiscretion was not planned, you see. But I couldn’t have planned anything that delicious. We were only meeting up for an hour, for drinks, fairly innocent. The parking in the city is mere dollars after 8pm, and it is scarce anywhere else, therefore it was only natural I park there. We had our drinks, we flirted, we stared, we knew. We left after 45 minutes and he asked if I wanted to go for a walk; things were quiet in the city because it was a weeknight. We could just walk and talk and not be overcome by noise pollution. I agreed but I wanted to drop my bag off to my car, and so we went.
It was still warm outside, warm for October that is. I wore my favorite skirt, knee-length and full soft cotton. The parking lot was pretty deserted but I still thought better of it, that perhaps I should not leave my purse on the car seat. After a moments consideration I leaned over to the passenger seat to tuck my bag under it. With one knee on the driver’s seat and my ass in the air….well you can see what might have put a notion in his head. I slipped my car key off the ring and kept only that key, tucking it into my bra as his eyes followed my hands. As soon as I shut my door and turned around, he slowly and methodically came closer to me. Closer and I was pressed against my car with him pressed against me.
The kissing got heated and intense until a foursome noisily made their way to their cars, their drunken voices reverberating irritatingly off the concrete structure. They were slow to go away so we decided to exit quickly and take that walk after all. The closest and quickest way away from them was that stairwell.
As soon as we were alone again he grabbed my hand and pulled me to him. As we kissed he slowly backed me up to the wall. No, not the wall….it was the glass. He pressed against me with purpose and I could not ignore the hard cock pressing into my belly. His hands took on a life of their own and soon found my ass. Not enough, apparently, as he slowly pulled my skirt up in the back until my ass was exposed to the glass, to whomever could be out there, and his fingers explored my flesh.
To say that things quickly escalated would be an understatement. He removed my shirt and yanked down a bra cup roughly to sate his desire for his lips to meet my breast. My hands found his cock, found his button, found his zipper, found his cock. With his hands on the glass I crouched down to suck him for a few moments. One hand reached down to manuever my bra strap off of my shoulder, to expose my breast to his fingers. As I sucked, he pinched. When he breathlessly warned me that he could see someone outside, I looked up and flat-out stated that I simply didn’t care. He groaned and then roughly pulled me up to standing. His lips found my nipple. His fingers dove under my sodden panties and quickly found my clit.
“Too bad you don’t have a condom” I said.
And he stopped, immediately and stood up. As he stared me down he wordlessly reached for his back pocket and….yes, he did too have one.
I grinned a grin that said “You cocky bastard” as he turned me around, away from him. My palms on the glass, I backed up until I was bent over at the waist, legs spread a bit. He flipped my skirt up and in one move yanked my panties off my ass and left them around my ankles. They cut into my skin a bit as I spread my legs further while waiting for him to sheath up. He entered without warning and we both cursed.
What would someone see if they looked up? For how could they not from say, 50 feet, notice the couple fucking in the well-lit stairwell 4 floors up? They saw me being fucked; my one forearm pressed to the glass and my forehead resting on my arm. One breast hanging outside of my bra, swaying from the force. My other hand between my legs as I violently rubbed my clit. I know how slutty I looked. But they wouldn’t have known that I barely knew the guy fucking me, so they wouldn’t have known the depth of my sluttiness.
Right there in that stairwell. That very well-lit and glassed-in stairwell.
Read MoreAll text and images on this site require permission before they can be used anywhere. To obtain permission, email dangerouslilly @ gmail.com
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