Jun 172008

Is it still exhibitionism if no one knows?

I chat online with guys every day. Some are flirtations that have been around awhile, some are boys-of-the-week. I get VERY aroused when the flirting turns sexual. Not so much cyber-sex as in “I’m doing this to you, can you feel me?”, but the “if I were there” game…the virtual show and tell game…swapping stories and fantasies and compliments and photos (oh the photos…my favorite sort of online exhibitionism…we’ll talk about those another time)

I work in an office, I’m kinda like the receptionist/secretary. Therefore, I don’t hide away in a cubicle or office. There’s only two ways out of our area, and to go out the more-oft used doors, you go past my desk. In any given minute, I have someone walking past my desk. Being that it’s a receptionist desk, I have one of those “counter” like things in front of me.

So I sit here and off and on throughout the day, I’m talking to people. Some days it’s fairly innocent. Other days….whew. Now the people I’m talking to online know what I’m doing, but my coworkers do not.

What am I doing? Talking about sexually explicit things. Perhaps going into the public restroom to snap a photo or two on my phone to send to the lucky recipient. But sometimes…..

Sometimes I’ve gotten out a badboy similar to this:

Slipped it somehow into my panties with the remote in my hand, hidden under my desk. Depending on if I’m wearing pants or a skirt that day, the handpack is hidden under clothes or perhaps not. I nestle it between my pussy lips and against my clit and turn it on. And I try really hard not to let on to all these people walking by my desk what I’m really doing. Which is difficult because this particular toy can get really powerful at the top setting of the dial. At the lower settings it is quiet enough, once nestled, for me to use at my desk (key thing here, for me, which is why I’m having trouble finding a replacement for it since it just died today)

I have had one online-amour, K, instruct me when to turn it on, what setting, when to crank it up and when to let myself orgasm.
I’ve sat here and squirmed, flushed red, driving myself to the edge…but the combination of the act and the talking has me so wet that the vibrating little devil won’t stay put. I try to discretely use my fingers/hand to press the bullet to my clit.
A few times I’ve orgasmed…right here at my desk. Once I had to take it to the restroom (the public one) and discretely finish off in a stall.

So. My point. I had one ;)

SOMEone knows what I’m doing…the online object of my lust…but the people around me do not. sure, I could easily get caught with my hand down my pants, or flushing a little too much.
Is this still exhibitionism?

  4 Responses to “Let’s talk semantics”

  1. I say yes. For me, the fun of voyeurism is the possibility of being seen, which given that you’re at a reception desk, is a very real possibility. I love that thought.

    I also like the idea of an “audience” that I know is there, but that’s not quite as much fun as the “getting busted” possibility.

  2. I’ve just found you, and I wanted to see how this all got started. We share that same affection for voyeurism, something that I’ve developed to such an art that I’m able to pry the deepest darkest secrets from my contacts, and that leaves me oft times breathless. I’m also an exhibitionist and this I will explore by sharing with you a similar event(s) of masterbating at my office desk. There have been times when surfing that the sexual energy has become too much to bear, and as you probably know, the male anatomy when touched just gets harder..
    And so I’ve lowered my pneumatic chair enough to cover me more, and I’ve opened my fly to allow myself to spring forth, and with tissue in hand and keeping an eye out the door to the warhouse, I proceed to work it.
    However my best event was years ago when I shared a cubicle with others in a maze of cubicles that opened onto the main “lane” of the other cubicles and offices. At any point someone could walk by and not only see what might be on the screen but also to see the bulge in my pants. Of course I could really only do this after hours when there were very few if any people around. Still it was too risky and thus impossible to fully expose myself, so I would tuck the tissue into the area of the head of my cock hoping to catch the majority of the eruption and work my erection through the material of my pants.
    Then I would take a nice long stroll through the newsgroups, viewing what pictures and stories I could, building to an incredible plateau..that eventually when it peaked and orgasm came… was a SUPER orgasm. Yes men have them too. It was full body, starting at the base of my brain, balls contracting, semen gushing experience that the tissue completely failed to contain and took me several minutes to recover from.
    I managed to exit the building discreetly carrying my lunch bag in such a way as to cover the wet mark visible on my jeans.
    I have MANY more things to share perhaps, if you enjoyed “looking in my window” ;-)

    And to answer your question. YES it’s still exhibitionism because you are public and there exists the potential for “exposure” and thus the reason for doing it.


  3. Hussy.

  4. I always did promise (threaten? :P) to come back and read your archives. Surprise! :P

    Exhibitionism? Yes, I’d say so. I figure there are two kinds of exhibitionism: the one where you’re being knowingly observed and the one where there’s a risk, you might be caught or punished or even observed without your knowledge. I personally love the idea of someone hiding, watching and getting turned on themselves.

    I went to the polling station with ben-wa balls in this week and only Fractal knew. But it still felt like exhibitionism to me. There’s no way anyone else could’ve known or really found out, so perhaps it isn’t really. Still hot though.

    Sorry to blather!
    Blacksilk x

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